Thursday, September 6, 2012


When I first had my awakening experience, one of the things I was keenly aware of was this new energy moving through me.  It was conscious, I knew, yet I could not explain how I knew this for the fact that this was something that I sensed within.  We are notoriously distrustful of our insides, and if we are not busy feeling that way, we can also be uncertain about HOW we feel.  The truth, I think, is that most of us wind up being like a basket where we carry all sots of notions and feelings, good and bad.  Some serve us, some don't.  But sensing what you are is so very important for it leads to feeling more solid about who you are and what you are.  When you do that, I think that you reach a place of peace and in that peace you can feel things that might have escaped your notice previously. This was so for me in awakening.  It was as though some new channel opened up inside of I had this great piece of stereo equipment but never touched this one dial.....and that dial seemed a big mystery.  One day, for whatever reason, that dial responds to touch and suddenly the volume moves up.  The sound is suddenly richer as this knob adds a whole new dimension to this marvelous piece of equipment.  The big a-ha has just happened.

I soon realized that the energy moving through me was a negative and positive cooler or more receptive while the other was dynamic, directing and "warmer" in a way.  One moved into the other and both seemed to hold one another in an energetic embrace. This was the universe, this was cosmic consciousness. Using language to describe all of this or to relate to it can be tricky because this energy is without form even though it gives rise to form.  I have long believed that we have to be careful about the words we use because they create a nonspecific picture in people's minds that can be interpreted many different ways.  When I discuss art projects with my students in the sculpture class that I teach at a local university, I require them to provide a drawing.  I do this because my experience has shown just how poor words are at conveying information.  A picture is incredibly efficient, and it brings to mind the saying "a picture is worth a thousand words."   It was Philip in his newly discovered gospel in the desert of Egypt in the Nag Hammadi scrolls where he said the same thing, which is that we need to be careful about the words we use, for words create images and we then can become prisoners to these images.  So while it may sound terribly pedantic to you that I say all of this, it is important for reasons you may not even realize.  Words can govern how you think.  Words can free just as they can imprison.  I want you to consider that when I say masculine and feminine, I am being very specific but I am also being very broad.  I know that what we see here now in this place has ever higher expressions in other realities.  Our own awareness is capable of glimpsing these realities.  Thales, the Presocratic philosopher once said that "All things are full of gods" and I firmly feel that he was referring to what I glimpsed in the process of my awakening, which is that all of existence is multidimensional in nature and that what exists in us here exists in still "larger" scales of consciousness. Everything is connected, and it is this connection that allows for every part to communicate to all other parts.  It is what happens when you are able to manifest something in your life, too.  Imagine this quantum ripple that spreads out at light speed through all of matter, like some giant search engine of the soul to find the perfect thing to match your wish, to help you to manifest it.  I am jumping ahead of myself though because there is more to fill you in on first.

What I knew in the process of awakening was that the energy was a teacher living inside of me, showing me the one thing that as it would turn out, would be reflected in nearly every aspect, every nook, every cranny of existence.  It took a while to understand how this could be so.....and while the knowing came in a flash, it took some time to see how it applied itself throughout life. It showed me that it was like a two-stranded energy that wove itself through the center of all life, much like a necklace of beads is held by a cord.  It is this cord, you see, that is the essence of all life, is the soul of the cosmos, the bearer of life and light to everything that is.  And when I say "life" I am not speaking only of sentient life.  No. The universe is a living thing since its body is filled from top to bottom with this energy.  The difference is that most people simply are not aware of it.  The language of the cosmos is feeling, and this is one thing that you will come face to face with when you go through an awakening which is that you now have added sensing ability or awareness.  You don't just SEE the universe, you FEEL it.  This is what all the monks and sages and gurus have been talking about in relation to this seemingly elusive state that leads to samadhi.  When this energy filled me, it showed me how it was present in everything.  It was a yin and yang principle.  Just as in thermodynamic hot moves to cool, as positive moves to negative, so too does this energy in all things.  I very much feel that this principle can be seen reflected throughout the cosmos.

So take manifestation.  You wish for something, you let it go, and it eventually comes back to you as a fulfilled wish. Consider for a moment that as the universe is itself neutral, a kind of living canvas upon which you create your life, that the energy of manifestation is the result of two seeming opposites working together to help make your wishes happen......two energies that follow the content of your own energy to a "T."  This means that if part of you believes, for example, that you can manifest abundance, but that you may also have a competing belief that deep down you aren't worthy of it somehow, you send that out with each wish and you wind up with abundance  with strings or little glitches attached to it.  Maybe its a great money deal that winds up having some problem that emerges somewhere in the process.  Its that feeling like "I know I deserve good things, but it seems things always go to !*%# in the end!"  This is the result of some competing issue that is in the way that helps to form events, and the universe, being neutral, takes the energy as it comes and fashions you this event or opportunity in order to aid your fulfillment.  In dropping away the competing beliefs and resolving those things, suddenly your own being becomes a clearer transmitter of information to the universe.  The glitch is gone.  The "yeah but" is edited out of the situation.

But about this yin and yang, though.....

Consider that just as your own body has two currents of masculine and feminine that rise right up into the brain and crown, the hemispheres of your brain are themselves also formed and informed by this same energy.  The two energies cross in the head where the bliss of union is experienced by the awakened  yogi's and yogini's.  The left hemisphere is masculine, the right is feminine.  The masculine is linear, rational, and is most often good at language. It can pick out the tree in the forest, but his eyes glaze over when you look at the forest.  The feminine, which is the right brain, is holistic, intuitive, irrational, and sees the forest and can be bored looking at just one tree. Brought together, however, and there is a spark and a flame of inspiration kindled. Here great ideas are born. No, the right brain is not the artistic side because in order to make art you need a way to express it.  The right brain very much needs the left brain to help give it form.  The feminine turns to her consort and says "Oh I am feeling something so deep.....but its so deep that I just can't quite put it to word....." and the left brain is able to put it to word because that is what it does.  It is great at being able to hone in on one thing and identify it. Left alone, though, the left brain can chop and dice the universe until its so may little pieces....and it will only be able to see each piece, not how all the pieces go together.  I needs the right brain for this, the one who can magically conceive the implicate order in all things.  How she does this is not rational in the least.  Its almost like magic.  But together, they do a wonderful job of helping to create.  They are the very engine of creation. And when it comes to manifesting, I am seeing the same circular loop of the masculine and feminine energies working together.

When you wish for something, it most often comes about as a result of the left brain being able to give form and order to what it is that you want.  Here, there is a brilliant spark that is made, but this is all that it is for now.  This spark must be released entirely and allowed to go out into the "world" into the receptive realm of the feminine.  It is interesting because the Hindus often refer to the feminine as being the world.  Jesus, in the Gnostics texts speaks of the world as being the Great Mother. The native Americans call earth "Mother" also.  But what I am talking about is the energetic principle IN the all things......and as the spark of intention is released, it moves through the inner world and is nourished into existence, into full being by the body of the feminine force.  This can emerge as an object, event, or idea. The more that the spark can be utterly released, the better able it is to move freely through the universe to find its moment of conception in the feminine force.  Then, in perfect timing, the feminine brings forth this new thing that is the result of your wish, your hope, your intention. Because the feminine force is so broad, so infinite, she can give birth to anything in the same way that a woman will conceive and then give birth to a child.  This child might be short or tall, dark or light headed.  She might bring forth twins.  Part of what she will give birth to will be how the spark was sent, the content of that spark.  She is capable of bringing forth such a profusion of things, you see, and just as a woman can do this, so too does the mother of the world do this.  Her presence is in everything, and when you touch her with your intention, your intention winds up touching everything.  Instantly.  Holographically.  Events can take months to come to fruition and they can also happen in a flicker of an eye.  What makes the difference?  When you are able to release a block in you that is keeping something from taking place in the world around you, you may find just as I did that this is when the phone starts ringing with someone asking you if you would like to take part in an opportunity that you had been wishing you could be involved in for years.....and in that moment, the world didn't just align with you, but merely was able to receive the right message devoid of any competing material.  Maybe it was that you felt that you would love to try some new kind of work but that you might not be good enough at it......who knows really, for the reasons can be legion, and all I can do is pluck examples for why this might be so in order for you to begin to understand how this all works.  But when you remove the blocks, the energy flows.  And it flows from one pole to the other pole, from intention to manifestation, from masculine to feminine.  This, then, is the very engine of creation and manifestation.  When you can bring more energy through your system, this speeds up the process of manifestation as everyone who has had an awakening speaks of or experiences.  In fact, the lag time between through and manifestation can be measured in seconds or minutes, not days, months, or years.  If you can allow yourself to FEEL it as deeply as possible, as vividly as you can, you are literally magnetizing your own energy field so that the universe conforms to that image.  The more energy you move through you, the faster this happens for the simple fact that energy is magnetic.  Electricity creates magnetic fields, for example, and part of your own biological functioning does involve weak electrical fields. Your own iron rich blood helps to build and propagate an electromagnetic field around your body which we all refer to as the human aura.  For those who can see them, you can read all kinds of material present in thought, feeling, and even in the biological functioning of the body.  I know this because I began seeing auras when I was 18 and was a careful observer of all that I saw.

This is how your own brain works, two hemispheres in consort together to bring the light of inspiration. They are themselves manifestations of the yin and yang principle in your own body, in the giant filing cabinet and control center that helps organize information in your physical organism.  It is how you fall in love.  It is how new life is formed, and it is how the universe is threaded with these seeming opposites which in truth are aspects of one another.  In the particle/wave duality, we know that while these two states are different, they are one. I write about this in my book Waking The Infinite in terms of the particle/wave duality, and consciousness itself also exhibits traits that fit very well into the notion of the finite particle and the infinite wave.  We are both. When these two forces are in harmony manifestation can happen much quicker.  What happens when your brain works together?  Inspiration happens.  What happens when a man and woman are in harmony together?  Pure bliss.  When the two are in harmony within you, this union of yourself brings their union as energetic forces.  Quite naturally, this union creates ecstasy or bliss, and this is just what all the yogis seek and describe as the ultimate in self realization.  This bliss is orgasmic in nature, the very moment which is conception in the physical body, and which is inspiration in the energy body.  Normally, in the physical, this orgasmic energy is expressed or experienced as a release.  In the energy body, however, it is not limited and can build in potential in awareness so that it becomes a standing wave whose crest does not break.  As long as these two remain in your awareness in union, their energy remains as their very essence which is bliss. When this standing wave is present, all who awaken find that synchronicities and unusual events take place in rapid succession.  The world suddenly begins to be much more responsive in a moment by moment way.  Manifestation is now no longer just a spark, but is now an ongoing flow of events.  You are now living a life that is a discovery of what is possible in this new terrain. This is the engine of creation, and just as the creator's own continuous union within supports the universe, so too does your own continuous union within support creation at the level of your life.  It is true, then, that you are learning the basics of creation.  For creation to continue as a river flows without drying up it requires this same continuous attention.  The fulfillment is the result of your own creation. Again, Creation 101.

This same aspect can be seen as operating on so many levels.  Perhaps it may seem that all of this is just a convenient way to see things.  If you feel into it, perhaps you too can begin to experience this directly.  Everything resolves into the dance of the yin and yang.....all threaded through creation, all present at every level.  All is love, all is focused in this dance of gazing one into the other in the greatest secret that will ever be revealed to you.  It is, in truth, THE secret, for they are mother and father of them all.  if you know them at the smallest level, you know them at the largest.  Their presence as the mechanism for manifestation.  From the subatomic to the cosmic.  So when you are wondering why things happen as they do, consider the content of the masculine pulse and what it contains, which is the light of your intention.  It is both divine as well as karmic.  Upon its wave your awareness and intention rides.  Then, just as importantly, consider the content of the feminine within you.  The more free you
are from hitches and issues, the more at peace you are and the more peace will come to you.  As more peace comes to you, this becomes a naturally self reinforcing condition. Trust it, lean on it, devote yourself to it and always seek its grace, it unending capacity to forgive and allow you a path towards ascension, which is assured if you are willing to take it.

The energy is circular. It builds as long as the union remains  As awareness remains balanced on the quantum wave, you will see the presence of it in your life. This is the greatest love, the love that someone once told me "is you and the universe."  We are all connected by this. We are all this.


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