Healing Karma

The act of healing karma is the single most powerful act you can be involved in.  It is an act of love, compassion, and truth to your higher self.  Being able to heal karma, though, can seem to be akin to sending yourself to the moon with a slingshot. It just doesn't seem possible. 

So lets look at what happens inside of you that serves to create karma.  I am not going to look at positive karma but the type of karma that is the result of attachment to certain feelings, most often hurtful ones. It isn't that positive karma is of little concern, it isn't.  Positive karma is a very good thing, and cultivating it is just as important as knowing how to root out negative karma; they go hand in hand and as you root out negative karma, it makes it much easier to build a more positive framework for your life and what you attract.  The issue with negative karma is how much it can hang us up, making us do what we do not want to do and keeping us from doing what we want to do.

Ego is a largely unemotional part of you, and yet it can cause all kinds of emotions to fire off in you as a result of a sense that it has, based on a judgement it is making about what it THINKS it sees, as being the reality of a situation in life.  Because of how ego works, it often identifies with things having to do with past hurts and laches on to details that are then used as the filters for experience going forward.  What this does is it keeps us from seeing things as they ARE.  We can often have these distortions running inside of us for lifetimes, and they can wear deep grooves in who we are, creating a kind of recursive effect to our feeling and reactions.  It governs what we do, how we create, how we think and respond to the world around us. Dealing with this aspect of ourselves is the single most productive thing available to us in reaching a better place.  It can win freedom for you from a range of rough feelings and ways to seeing and responding to the world. In a very real way, ego keeps us from seeing the larger picture because that old hurt was just too important to it than what they truth might be.

The thing about ego is its been given a much broader place than it should have had in the psyche.  We have allowed this important filter in our being to really go overboard. Because the ego is always comparing and dividing things out, its almost always seeing differences between what one person gets and another.  Your sister gets a differently sized piece of cake, and you notice this, note it, and then wait for it to happen again.  There is karma in this. Suddenly, your ego decides the the world is just out to get you.  Because you believe this, you attract it.  That is how the Law of Attraction works. But because you are so convinced that the world is out to get you, you don't consider for five seconds that it could just be your belief system, your bias or prejudice, that is causing all of this.  As you refuse to see the truth, you dig a still deeper hole for yourself. This is a big loop and it loops round and round ad infinitum if you let it.  How does it feel to let go of a karma?  Its freedom.  Its a very simple, sweet moment of letting something go, of effectively snipping the string of a looped piece of behavior or belief in your being that has eluded you for a long time.  But no matter how long this has turned around in you, looping and waiting for the right set of circumstances that activate it, you can at any time snip the loop and watch as it simply falls away as though it had never been.

The way out of karma is not by using ego.  To do this means letting the ego slip backwards within you.  It can be a gradual process for some.  Those who are most mental will have the hardest time.  This is much easier for those people who can handle a little mystery, who don't need to control every little thing and who are happy with not always knowing what is going to happen next.  By realizing that your egoic self is but a small subset of a still larger self that is huge, you can realize that your egoic self is like a small child being led by an infinite self, almost invisibly, yet always there. Just because you cannot see where you are going does not mean that where you are being led isn't a good place.  Its a perfect place for where you are not, but this takes some trust.  If you realize that your belief fuels your experience, then you can probably appreciate that if you do not trust the world or the universe to bring you the right things, then most likely it wont.  However, if you open yourself to not needing to know every detail, and consider that while you may not see results immediately, but can trust that you are being led out of the harder parts of your life, you open up to the universe in a whole new way.  You make room in your belief that the universe isn't just out to get you but that you COULD have been influencing the universe all along.  Taking the leap, you open a door that may have been closed previously.  If you wish it, all of it can change toward something more aligned with your core being.  To do this means removing those beliefs and unresolved issues that are in truth attachments to hurt, negative karma, and once you do this, your landscape will begin to change.  Healing karma is instantaneous, and either you do or you don't, so there is no in between.  Its not a gradual thing but instead happens in a twinkling.  And once you DO heal something its amazing how it will change how you feel and react to all of the things that used to cause you to react.  But how does one achieve this kind of healing?

First, you have to feel safe about doing it.  I think you have to realize that life will be better without it turning in your life.  This can be subtle.  Sometimes I think we almost need to be at the end of our rope in order to reach that place of surrender.  Not all of us are like this, but I think its something about human beings that keep us involved, holding on, unsure of what this letting go is all about. Second, I think that the presence of a part of yourself that some call the Observer can often play a critical role in helping you gain some perspective on the drama that you wind up feeling as a result of the karma.  This portion of yourself, in the midst of a very emotionally tied up time, is critical it seems in allowing the self to feel differently by offering a different solution to how to feel. You see, most negative karma makes us feel crappy.  What the Observer does, is it removes all of that investment in feeling away.  This is a remarkable change that can take place and it is mirrored in the brain where we take our emotional centers and balance them with portions within the neocortex, the prefrontal lobes which provide us with the ability to step aside from our emotional issues and look at the impact some emotional response will have on others as well as our own selves.  Its a unique part of us, and is the next wrinkle in our development....For as much as I go on about feeling and how important it is, this part of the Observer self is just as useful and important also.  Without it, we can often get so tied up in our problems that we have a hard time seeing a way out, or where we are.  The Observer is like a neutral party that enters the scene and then asks "And just what is the problem here?"

By bringing in the Observer, the Observer can calmly teach you how to feel different in the midst of much turmoil.  It may also lead to releasing any old material that you had been hanging onto.  The Observer shows you how to BE different.  While it is calm and unemotional, it seems important for these times when we are shedding those layers. It has been in my experience that the Observer state has most often been the most use when my emotions were the highest.  I cannot speak for others, only for myself, but I suspect that there may be triggers in our brain as well as our own consciousness that bring on this aspect of our being during times of stress.  People often describe feeling an amazing sense of calm in the midst of very chaotic and even scary events.  Think of the man whose car goes down an embankment and with his child trapped in the back seat, he very calmly breaks open a window and gets the child out.  A son sees his father trapped under a car that fell off the jack and lifts the car off him. All describe a feeling of immense calm overtaking them.  They feel as though something inside of them took over but not in an emotional way.  I often wonder how we can learn to cultivate this Observer in ourselves during day to day experience.  It may be that its always there, but its presence is more obvious when we are upset.  Perhaps it seems more calm in comparison to how we felt before.  It may be a coping mechanism, even a survival mechanism.  It seems that by getting to a point where you realize all the old things you have tried have not turned up any results, you simply call on the universe to take on the problem, and you ask for help.

Consider that it may be possible that you do not know HOW to fix a problem, but if you remain open to the idea that there is a way through it that is above your own "pay grade" then you give yourself an out.  There is real merit in giving it all to God, or to some sense of a larger being, self, or universe.  If you are very process oriented, maybe you imagine that you are putting all your problems into a trunk and giving it to the universe to sort.  Consider that you are putting your deepest secrets in it, entrusting your most fragile thoughts and feelings in there for the universe to take care of.  Ask for help from a higher power.  So often, people are healed in just such a way.

Now, for the cutting of the loop. Even if you feel invested in an old hurt, tell yourself daily that you are working on cutting the loop of the karma. Imagine a pair of scissors cutting a loop of string inside of you that is this karma, and then watch how the string just drops away.  Now tell yourself that this is what you want to be able to do with the karma.  You may not know how you will do this, but consider that there is a way that you yourself may not know of just yet but that is within you to do (you just don't know it yet). Consider also that the feelings that keep you invested in the karma might be built on misunderstanding.....and that the reason why things are hard for you and another person caught up in this same karma is the result of just not seeing eye to eye.  You THINK you know that this person only wanted to hurt you, or maybe they did something so hard and difficult that its hard to get past.  For the most part, this is the thing that keeps a karma active, which is the inability to forgive someone.  When you are able to step back and use that Observer, sometimes you can gain perspective. In one case it took going back to a past life to see events and how they had happened to another person to understand WHY they always responded the way they did to me.  In one case, a child had died....and that person wound up having a common karma with their family members that resolved around the fear of losing a child, the fear that someone would not pay enough attention and they would lose the child....which had actually happened.  As a result of this, this person and their family line had reinforced this common karma.  What this meant was that these people would wind up with people who would mirror the behavior that this person had who was around when the child died.  This was replayed over and over until the karma was healed.  Until then, though, the people would respond in a very exaggerated way to events. Small things would become big.  It would SEEM as though the world was out to kill the child....and sure enough, events would happen in such a way that it seemed this was so, even though in truth, no one was dying.....they were just playing and replaying that old hurt over and over and it had its effects on everyone around them.  Being able to see that they were responding because of THEIR karma helped to lessen the reaction to MY karma in this regard. It helped me to see and understand that it really wasn't personal, and in many ways, it really wasn't about me....even though I have managed to become inculcated because of my OWN karma which had nothing to do with having a child die. What held me to them, though, was my inability to forgive myself for things I had done earlier in life, and it was the similarity of this hurt that bound me to them.  The release of the karma lay in my being able to see things for how they were, instead of taking a defensive posture.  By doing this, I was able to reach into a place of understanding.  I was able to have compassion for how much of a hurt this might have caused.  I was able to look upon my own qualities that led to our being attracted and realized that this was just the universe working in its usual way, which wasn't to punish, but to be the mirror that it had always been.  So what was the way out of this tangle of feelings?

The answer is forgiveness.  In this forgiveness, there is a willingness to let it all just go. Analysis in this moment stops, working through the details stops.  Finding a way to forgive stops.  Being ready to make that change, being willing to JUST let it go begins to move and turn, and its in this movement, this willingness to feel differently, that we do.  And as we do, we can feel how freeing this is for us.  Its simple, though, much like how a child can forgive so easily, and let bygones be bygones.  The forgiveness is made for the people who seemed to have created this mess to begin with (in the mind of the ego) but it spreads until you realize, no, I must forgive myself.....for in that moment, perhaps you realize that you had a hand in creating this and the deepest forgiveness must be within YOU.  And its this that binds you to the world of effects and phenomenon of a particular kind.  You see?  Without being entirely aware of it, your inability to let go of an old hurt kept it fresh and vibrant in your life so that the world simply formed itself around that hurt since like attracts like.

Want to be free?  Forgive.  Forgive yourself.  If its easier to do it by forgiving others, then do so.  Its good for them.  But I think you may find that this will lead to forgiving yourself.  Its letting it go, allowing it to go. You may well find that the feeling was there because you weren't able to forgive yourself of some past hurt or trauma, and the very act of holding on to it served to bring all these people who had been hurt by others as a result of similar actions you had been involved in merely served to bring you into the realm of this same drama. Like attracting like.  Again, the way through it, the scissors that cut the chord, is forgiveness.  Forgiveness allows for the old cord to go. 'Fessing up and forgiving takes all the power out of the karma and it drops away.  Its a nonissue from that moment onward and you can feel it dropping away as you realize you have quite literally a new lease on life.  Sometimes just feeling exhausted over this mystery of why things keep cycling over and over is enough to make you throw up your hands and cry help.  And this is the best place to be in.  HAVE no resolution!  HAVE no answer!  Its when you have not rational way around all of this that you actually find the one thing that will work.  And, again, this is why handing your problems over to God or to some higher power whatever that might be, is a powerful way of doing the same thing.  In it is the trust that whatever this higher power is, it is infinitely more capable of taking care of it.  Its enough to get the problem off your back, and when you can do this, you have sprung from the clutches of a very worrisome karma.  Yes, we are little, yes we are limited, yes we are like children.  Some things, are simply above our pay grade.  Don't TRY to solve the problem.  Let it go.  Free your mind, free your heart, because its only in this place that you can feel the rush of love that is the universe.  By punishing yourself, you literally cut yourself off from the love that IS the universe.....that you ARE....that we ALL ARE!

The way that you reach this self is by grace.  Grace allows it to happen.  It means that compassion is more important that one-upmanship, that love is the divine pulse for all life.  When you awaken to this, you will not just know it, you will feel it running all through you. By lightening your load, you literally provide more space for the divine to live within....and I promise that what this divine thing is, is beyond any religious teaching on this earth....for the experience has been so rare an event that most are guessing about its transformative power sometimes.  And yet, you can make this room in your life for it.

I will add in parting that my awakening was fueled by a choice to "work through" an old issue that I had been carrying around for years.  I thought I had a problem to somehow solve, but in the midst of trying to solve it, I found that my problem was about solving what I thought I had to solve or understand (like some math problem or riddle of the universe).  What I most needed to do was to JUST get that old burden off my back!  In Christianity, we see this as a confessional.  We have this way of getting things off our backs that have been bothering us, and when we do, we feel lighter.  When I spoke to the man who listened to my story for the first time in an understanding way, I realized I hadn't come to him for some kind of advice, I came to be heard....to confess in a sense.  When I did this, I magically felt a hundred pounds lighter.  I had not realized just how burdened I had been previously.  In being lighter, I made way for something even more powerful to come into my life.  I can't say that this will work for everyone, but it certainly catalyzed a big shift in my own experienced and launched me onto the path I am on now.

So I hope that this has helped.  I hope that it may serve as a tool that you can use in working through your own stuff, in finding that place where you can simply give it up and let it go.  When you do, you do yourself the biggest favor.  Trust me on this.  Some things are simply above our pay grade!

Nemasté

The Abydos Helicopter - A Question Of Geometry

In Egypt there is a Temple in Abydos to Seti I also known as the Great Temple of Abydos.  While not the oldest of the buildings in Abydos, its origin dates back to 1290 to 1279 BC,  The temple was begun by Seti and finished by his Son Ramses the Great.   There are numerous temples and buildings in this area which was  called Abdu by the Egyptians and then Abydos by the Greeks.  A number of Pharonic dynasties made their mark here, building temples and burial chambers to their kings.

Its also the place of a great mystery that has troubled Egyptologists for a number of years and has excited onlookers who are able to see what appear to be a whole series of flying machines on a lintel above one of the columns in the Great Temple. I say "appear" because Egyptologists seek to explain that this is NOT what these images suggest at all, but are instead the result of two or more layers of stone that have fallen away from each other in order to create a composite image, effectively an accidental image.  According to Egyptologists, this is not something that exists as it appears.  During tours of the temple, this one interesting element is not pointed out to visitors.  There seems that there is a policy in place to simply ignore this aspect of the structure. 

The explanation by leading Egyptologists is that the markings that look like a helicopter, glider and perhaps hovercraft of some kind, is that the details were the result of plaster falling off the surface of the stone which had been placed over to hide the markings underneath by a succeeding dynasty.  The argument made by Egyptologists is that these craft are merely the result of chaotic forces, of chance, creating an illusion of something that simply isn't there.  This is something that Egyptologists call a palimpsest.  

New Note 2/13:  The argument that they make is that this is actualy a composite image, the result of two layers showing through resulting in this accidental result.  Damage or loss of layers is also part of the argument.  It was caused by accident/chaotic forces.  The other issue involves the glyph of the hand in the upper right corner.  Its called a hand by scholars, and while it does look like a hand, there is one very troubling issue with it, which is that there are NO KNOWN glyphs showing the hand that are as stretched or distorted as this one at Abydos.  All hand glyphs show a specific proportion, and the "hand" in the above hieroglyphic is over twice the length of a normal hand!  

Below is a standard glyph of a hand with a comparison of the glyph at Abydos.  

                

The argument is that this is all accidental, and we are just seeing something that does not exist except in composite or the result of damage.  Inscriptions were made on the lintel and then were covered with plaster to alter what was underneath to some degree. When the plaster fell off the stone inscriptions, it resulted in changes to the structure beneath.  Sometimes there is a blending of imagery that can make one believe they are seeing something that just isn't there.  I am going to include in this post some very interesting geometric analysis of the above image done by Jiri Mruzek which I think you will find compelling 

              Above:  images of the flower of life on vertical slab at Osirian Temple.

                                 Above:  closeup of the Flower of Life inscription.

For more information on this interesting image and the many other forms that can be derived from it (such as the Kabalah's Tree of Life) go here.

 It is worth noting, as an aside, that at an adjacent building, older than The Great Temple, is a smaller temple built to honor Osiris.  It is in this building that an image of the Flower of Life can be seen.  What is interesting about this image is that it shows up all over the world.  Its seen on the robes of monks in zen monestaries in Japan, it shows up in Europe and is in Egypt.  What's even more interesting is that when the Flower of Life design is expanded beyond its traditional border, a 3-D image of a cube emerges, often called Metatron's Cube.  This is a series of spheres that serve to make not a flat pattern but a cube which is made up of a number of circular cells.  To add to this, some are now claiming that the image etched onto the stone is done without the aid of pigment or dyes, but is actually etched somehow INTO the stone itself.  Other sources explain that the image emerges as a result of the use of a red ochre, a very stable colorant used in ancient times.   Some feel that this is a model of something, a form of geometry that contains presently unknown information about the structure of something....but what, we aren't sure.  Was it meant to be a teaching tool for understanding consciousness, or was it a tool or mathematical model to help describe how energy and matter interact?  Within the flower of life the five platonic solids can be found, so it could have been a way of containing a broad range of information in one form that was so esteemed, that it has shown up all over the world (except North or South America)

The assumption most often being made about such advanced technology is that if the knowledge for building airplanes and other air ships  were developed in the ancient past, why haven't we found evidence of it? Why no flying machines being dug up in the desert or in a temple somewhere?  Its a valid question, and can perhaps be explained by saying that the images here in Abydos may have been the result of still more ancient technology, perhaps only available in drawings  or scrolls that were themselves ancient which have since been lost to time.   It is possible that this was part of something much older than those doing the decorating or inscribing.  There may be reasons that just are not clear to us as to the why.  However, the emergence of this material is itself a possible proof for airships, even if we do not find any actual airships.  There are stories emerging from India that describe air machines, constructed vehicles called Vimanas that were used to fly all over the earth and out into the celestial realm.  

Consider that in India there is a book referred to as the Ramayana which describes Vimana as a double-deck, circular aircraft with portholes and a dome on its top.  It was described as flying with the speed of the wind and made a melodious sound.  Ancient texts on VImana are very numerous.  The ancient Indians wrote what amounted to flight manuals on the the control of various types of Vimanas.  There were four types of these craft:  the Shakuna, Sundara, Rukma, and Tripura Vimana.  At the very least, these accounts are very curious.  There is nothing about the accounts that would suggest that these books or writings were done in any kind of jest, a kind of ancient science fiction, that we can tell. For many, they are set aside as mere curiosities (perhaps because what they could represent is too troublesome to contemplate.  

It turns out, though, that other airships have emerged in other parts of the world, too, and there are some important elements that serve to lift these objects above mere fantastical models or delightful bird jewelry.  In South America, several craft in the form of medallions and jewelry show delta winged craft.  Realize that a delta wing craft bears no resembelance to a bird, but is something that emerged as a result of our own development of motorized flight in the last 100 years, and is one of the few ways to properly stabilize the rear portion of the plane and help it to steer properly through the air.  No bird has this device as part of their flying apparatus.  The forms from South America show an open cockpit, windshield, wings and the delta wing in the back.  When scanned and built to scale in the current day by a group of interested engineers, their model took off and flew on its first flight!  So on the one hand, we may not have an intact craft to point to, but we do have some very fascinating images as well as miniatures that are all extremely specific to the engineering requirements for flight.  Understanding how a delta wing operates would very likely require a working vehicle and not just a model in order to refine the development of the rear wing orientation.  It would be difficult to develop a model since it would likely involve a series of strings that would allow the individual to pull the model so it could attain the lift needed for flight and then to have another string (actually two in all likelihood) for turning the rear tail section to see how it would affect turning in flight.  

If you would like to see images of these planes, you can go to this post written last year about the same issue, but with less depth than this article.  Planes.  (this link will open a new window in your browser so you do not lose your place on the blog)

What follows is the analysis by Mruzek, describing how proportions emerge throughout the objects, more than just suggesting that the work was more than the result of an accident whereby some material was destroyed while other portions remained, creating a composite, which is called a  palimpsest. 

 

Egyptians Knew the Golden Section - Reconstruction as Proof

Contrary to being chaotic, the Abydos Helicopter scene is a deliberate creation. Its order is of the highest magnitude, being based on the historically famous Golden Section. The palimpsest explanation is simply out of the question, because one can just fire up a CAD program, and easily recreate the area under the helicopter in its exact main proportions from memory. The engraving utilizes Geometry, and the layout of the area is a variation on the basic Golden Section, wih emphasis on Golden Rectangles. The measure of ability to produce a given item measures understanding of that item. Pure opinions are hard to measure.
To begin with, golden rectangles in the area are quite auspicious, and beg testing. To test the area under the helicopter for golden section proportions I had assumed the semicircle's diameter as the starting unit for the construction below.

1 - a unit (semi)circle 
2 - an axis 
                               

Above - The semicircle in the glyph looks quite true, when tested by a circle. 


The usual construction begins with the six operations, or steps, as shown above. Circles '4', and '5' help in obtaining the axial cross, and are discarded afterwards. After this we have a choice of two operations, which will produce the Φ-ratio in the position. The diagram below uses the big green circle concentric with the red circle.
The yellow circle represents the glyphic semicircle, and becomes the red circle in the diagram below. The green circle from above is replaced by the blue square below.

The diagram of the classic Golden Section was imported into the Abydos image by scaling the unit circle to the semicircle in the image. As seen below, this experiment worked like a charm.



We are looking at the proof that the glyphs are proportioned by the Golden Section along the horizontal axis. The area under the helicopter is sectioned by vertical lines into Φ proportions. 

If the semi-circle's radius counts as 1 then the breadth of the row of six columns on the horizontal axis is (Φ²)  2.618..  From the semi-circle to the left on the axis we see successively the distances of  
  0.5  ←→ 0.5 ←→ Φ-1 (0.618..)   ←→  Φ-1 x Φ-1 (0.381966..)   ←→ Φ-1  

and combined distances like

    1   ←→  Φ (1.618..)   ←→  2   ←→    Φ² ( 2.618..)

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Above - A square divided by golden grid

The square that we employed for the Golden Section turns out to fit the square formation of columns, and triangles.
To get to its present location, the square rotates 45 degrees, and slides to the area's boundary on the left. Then it slides down, until the x-axis becomes the square's upper Golden Section divide (below).

The square fits the glyphic square of columns, and triangles very well on three sides, but we do see a bit of imprecision at the top. But, this is amply made up for by the accuracy of the Φ-rectangles within this square.
Here, it should be pointed out that it is the triangles, which give us the width of the square, and actuate the golden  proportion. According to Egyptologists' chronology, the columns came first, but according to the reconstruction by the Golden Section, the points of the square had been given  before any corresponding columns could be created! 



Horizontal lines from E, and F, with the vertical line from H, divide the square into golden sections. The lines are set by both the top and bottom of the middle triangle row,  the upper columns, and by the upper edges of the inner rectangles at bottom left . The square as above contains no less than eight Golden Rectangles, plus corresponding squares. All fit the layout of the engraved square really well.

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• Two big golden rectangles: horizontal width = 2.618..units, height = 1.618 units 
• Golden rectangles based on the unit circle (base 1 unit long, height 0.618)



We can recreate the golden rectangle limiting the area under the helicopter, because its left bottom corner coincides with the square's corner. The big rectangle from under the helicopter just happens to also be the perfect container for the upper two craft on the right, as well, if we see the plane as transporting a suspended object.  The plane's horizontal axis, which seems engraved in, is at the same time a Golden Section line for the rectangle. 
The rectangle on the left contains five smaller golden-rectangles, and they all fit the engraving. The entire area under the helicopter forms a perfect Golden Rectangle, when the helicopter's belly rests upon the upper line of the rectangle, although it's hard to see at this resolution. Fortunately, this marvellous [sic] fit is easy to see in the blow-up below.

(end of quoted document)

You can see the entire analysis that Mruzek makes here. 

 I wanted to include the proportional data here to suggest the possibility that there is more to this than meets the eye....or DOES meet the eye!  I think its a fascinating possibility.  For myself, I do not buy into the ET hypothesis.  Why can't humans come up with this stuff?  Why must it always come from off the planet? We essentially have the same brain as we had three thousand years ago, and even seven thousand and longer....so it stands to reason that while we might not have had the technology as a result of the particular arc of how civilization had developed up to a certain point, this doesn't preclude the possibility that we HAD developed all kinds of technology in our distant past, with most evidence of it having been destroyed.  When I hear the argument about the physical evidence, I can understand, but some things aren't so strange....dynasties destroy the great works of their predecessors, and remarkable things can wind up on the dust heap...

Awakening

The language of Awakening is Union.  

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The Path To Awakening

You live as though you are awake, but a part of you sleeps.  You think and feel and believe it to be what you are.  You are more.  When you feel deeply you touch upon hints of what can be within you.  Somehow, you have been cut off from the universe, but its been so long, you don't even remember the day it happened, or that it happened at all. 

This world does a lot to keep people in a scattered and seperated state of consciousness.  There is much that is created and driven that quite naturally keeps you distracted and unaware of the elephant in the room.  I used to feel like this was some kind of conspiracy, and while some insist it is, I suspect its more innocent than that.  Its merely the blind leading the blind.  What else more can they do?  A person who is awake will sound like a total lunatic because s/he can see.  And what they see is absolutely revolutionary.  And it changes them in a very significant way, and it makes them seem different.  And the blind cannot believe that a sighted person could see such things.  It just sounds like nonsense.  And so the blind are happier being led by still blinder people than even they are.  The sighted most often get shot or crucified or assasinated.  This is how deeply ingrained the blindness is in your kind. 

We make things that keep us distracted because we aren't aware there is something more to fix our attention on that is more worthwhile.  We enjoy having a fragmented awareness because it FEELS like we are busy and being industrious.  What we are doing is splintering the self and creating a habit of dividing awareness away from the unified beam that is your higher consciousness. It is true we are many things, many petals all on the same flower, but in order to know what you are in your higher or larger context, you cannot be scattered.  You have to be unified.  You actually have to begin to vibrate in the same way that your higher self vibrates.  And it does vibrate.  It does INTEND.  It does focus in a certain way.  And if you can begin to fall into that alignment, you will begin to hear the voice of your greater being speak to you in a language so broad you might not even think of it as language.....dreams, visions, seeming hallucinations, intuitions, extrasensory perceptions. 

The way toward awakening is by becoming more unified. And what is this unification?  What does it taste smell or look like?

Some people reach it through meditation, but most simply awaken without diets or postures or mantras or any of that.  I was told by a guide early on that the race was ready for simply stepping into this higher form of consciousness now.  It suggested to me that Awakenings would be on the increase. And they have, most certainly.  What happens in an awakening is when the self becomes more unified, less distracted.  The ego moves back just a bit as the feeling self is allowed more room.  There are some ancient texts that were ordered burned when the Christian church was first being formed that turned up in the Nag Hammadi Scrolls, discovered in 1945 and named for the town near where they were discovered in Egypt.  In them Jesus explains how two eyes become one, how the masculine becomes the feminine, and how a woman becomes a man.  He is explaining the process of inner unification that takes place as the alchemy of the self begins. If you can imagine that you have two wires at the top of your head that have been pulled out of their connections.  One wire is the positive and one wire is the negative.  Positive flows to the negative and they move in this way such that a circuit is made.  The two are made one and the lights come on.  if you can think of it that way, it might help you to understand that your being begins to move closer into itself so that the maculine energy that is you merges into the feminine energy that is you.

I know what you are thinking.  We have a lot of hangups about sex. Manly men, many of them, often tend to be a little homophobic.  Women can be just as scared and intimidated by gay women.  The truth is, though, every single person has both masculine and feminine in them.  Its what rocks the universe. Its what keeps the lights on.  Its life force.  Its how it is constructed. This cycling of energy is what keeps the energy moving and creative.  When these two energies move into unity there is an explosion of bliss which is orgasmic.  Orgasmic energy no longer is kept in the base chakra or limited to the genitals.  This energy flows through you as if some wildfire has been unleashed.  This is what some call the awakening of the serpent fire out of the base or root chakra and into the rest of the body.  The masculine and feminine within you connects and begins to build ever greater amounts of energy as you learn to hold ever greater amounts of it.  And to what end?  The end is the means, and the means is bliss. This is establishing a new baseline way of feeling.  Before, it was as though you were dead and you awoke.  This is exactly how it has been described in some of the early Christian texts when they described resurrection. The resurrection was when an individual awakened.  If you read these texts, its curious how they were set aside, ordered cast out of doctrine.  These were the very words that gave voice to what the kingdom was/is all about.  Kundalini began to move in them, it animated them, it arose through them like a torrent moving up the spine.  You can choose to think of it as two serpents, or any number of things, but all of these will simply be descriptions and not the thing itself.  All of this will simply be an image, and the image, if not chosen clearly will paint a distorted picture of what it is intended to describe. The point I am making is that you have both of these currents in you. Every particle that IS has these currents.  Everything has a positive and negative charge.  Everything.  The entire world is holographic, built on this principle down to the most elementary particles.  Everything emerged OUT of this singular principle. And when you can merge these two in your self, and feel them dance, you have awakened. 

...or on your way to awakening. 

The way that you awaken may be an entire mystery.  For some it is this way.  I certainly didn't do anything intentional to awaken it. I sometimes meditate, but not regularly.  I suspect that for me, the release came when I released an old guilt I had carried about my spiritual path.  When I let go of that, my energy soared. Everything began to change after that.  I had been holding so much of my own energy hostage without realizing it, I had literally had become distracted and tying myself up in knots.  When the knot came undone, I was no longer able to be the person I had been before.

Within you is a place where you are unified.  It is a feeling. It bring bliss and it can also bring anxiety for how strong it is (this is ego talking).  But as you surrender like a lover to it, the bliss flows and unity is yours.  Healing begins apace and you are on your way to becoming your more Essential Self, the personages Jesus described as the Father and Mother (Holy Ghost).  It is also what happens in the Hindu conceptualization when Shakti and Siva merge together in the crown (the truth though is they merge at the very beginning and flow up together....but that is another story).

When you become one, you will know this kingdom....

Cooling It (Coping Skill # 865)

Kundalini is not the wild energy that many would want to make it into.  Its less that the energy is wild and more that the individual is out of sync with this universal energy.  Once you understand that, things can be a lot easier to deal with.

Understanding that the energy responds to your feelings and thoughts is a biggies, but leads back to the first principle I just mentioned.

Any visualization you want or need to do to help calm kundalini will work.  That's because you don't need a system or a guru or some special stamp of certification from the kundalini institute for advanced consciousness.  No, this stuff is as old as the hills, and its kind of the most ancient vehicle for enlightenment and self transformation.  As such, it is entirely free from all of OUR conceptualizations.  Consider it like a meteor falling to earth, cracking open and giving you a view into the fundamentals of how things ARE....all without language or images even.  Its ancient.  And groovy because if you understand its not out to eat you, but to free you, you will have an easier way with it.

Realize that kundalini responds to intent.  If you want the energy to rise, it will.  I generally have about 12 hours after saying "rise" for it to begin to build in intensity.  I don't think its necessarily listening to me as much as my own system is doing what it can to follow or align to my intent.  Its possible, though, that if there is enough conflicting messages swimming around (maybe say fear about it even though you might think you want it to increase in strength), and in this case, you need to be clear about what it is you want before getting dependable results.  It will listen to you, and even "speak" to you in the language of feeling, so watch for this.  Its one aspect of the energy that can help you expand your relationship to it and give you more tools for coping. 

The fear you feel, that's unresolved fear in your subconscious.  You will want to tag the energy with it. Not exactly. Its YOUR energy and the fear and anxiety is all within you.  Kundalini isn't making you do anything. Its merely highlighting what was already there, but ignored.  You do not wrestle with kundalini, you simple surrender.  You let go.  When things are hard, its Kundalini telling you there is a knot to dissolve or let go. In the same way you might use a visualization to cool down and calm kundalini when its all the rage inside of you, so too can you begin to let things go by imagining things that slip away.  I often had images of slipping into a small boat at a dock in the cool of the evening and being entirely rudderless.  This image helped me surrender deeply to the force of my own making.

By visualizing cooling and calming things, your own energy will follow suit.  If you want kundalini to strengthen, simply ask that it do so, and I will guarantee that it will.  I have used this method for years when I was ready for the next round of churning that this energy does to your subconscious.  By doing this, by letting go deeper and deeper, we can heal all those knots and issues that we hadn't paid any attention to.  However, if you do not have control over your feelings or some aspect of your subconscious, you might have some trouble with what this part seems to be doing inside of you. 

You can even do a patterning exercise whereby you do a  mediation that focuses on cooling and calming energies.  At the beginning and end of the meditation, if you have an object that you can associate with the meditation and all the images contained in that meditation, you can, by simply touching your finger on the photo or object, enter a calm state very quickly.  It will take a few times to pattern your insides some, but it will be a wildly effective method.  This is one reason why there is so much ritual in practice.  It doesn't need the stamp of certification from the kundalini institute, though (pardon me if there IS such a place...I am merely making a point).

I can have a piece of turquoise paper, solid, representing the vastness of the ocean....very abstract, yet a touchstone to the larger experience.  When I do that, I find a sense of calm.  Sometimes I can merely imagine I am touching this piece of paper.  And I am there.  It can be that simple.  It can be more complex.  Whatever you choose will work.  there is no magic in someone telling you postures or any of that, even though everyone will tell you that there is/ There isn't.  there is a lot of patterning in all of that, and perhaps you can reach a place where countless others have been.  But do you want to be where others have been, or do you want to go where your soul is calling?  Its a wide open road and you are SAFE.  You have been protected all this time, and you are blessed!

Understanding that kundalini is much closer to your own natural self will help you in knowing how to create a system that works for you.  Once you realize that this really is a kind of game in a sense, all these systems and methods, you can fashion your own with great confidence in its working.  And if you HAVE no confidence, well, then you will probably be looking on the net for some methods to try.  No harm in that.  Its all perfect!

Good luck, and imagine cooling waters......if that's what you need.

Namasté

Dropping Pain Body

(Work In Progress)

One aspect of Awakening is a more acute awareness of karmic issues and old traumas through the medium of the energy body.  People who are awakened can have such exruciation pain in their bodies that they go to see doctors, always to no avail.  Its not real physical pain, but the effect of awareness of the buried pain now being brought to the fore.  All of this is a transmutation of that pain into joy.

The presence of the pain body can be  positive thing in that you are now aware of something you weren't aware of before.  This is a first important step.    The next step is to release what the energy has brought into your awareness.  Its a simple thing; its either pain or bliss.  You know the bliss and you know the pain, and you may know a blend of the two. Letting it all go, ceaseing identification with the issues that you cannot wrestle with, improve, fix or even patch that well, is in line with how our own healing takes place.  If we had been capable of healing it, it would have been healed by now; most hurts are ingrained from lifetimes ago....our hardest issues are those that have repeated over and over and over again.  Lime a theme, a cord running though all of our lives.  Ultimately, no matter the details, it all comes down to love.  In the end, all of this....everything in this world comes down to SELF love. Can you allow yourself to feel the love of the universe so powerfully that YOU are able to let go of everything that stands in the way of the experience?  Can you cease trying to compare yourself against another, or whether you got as much love as another, or whether you measured up in the eyes of others. 

The pain that you feel is the result of sitting at the table of life and reaching across that table seeking the love and approval of others instead of allowing the bliss field to resolve deep within you.  Absent that, a crack or fracture has developed.  Its against the true function of becoming; fix yourself and that singular act prepares you for meeting the perfect bliss of the universe instead of perceiving it through the distorted lens of karma.....any emotional frailty that leads to expectations that are unrealistic.  By knowing that YOU are o.k. first, you can begin to effect the release you need in order for your energy body to begin to disassociate itself with the energetic pattern you have clung to for so long.  Which is it?  Lack of love?  Abuse?  Poverty?  Some guilt could resolve as a pain in your heart.  A disconnect between your deeper bliss field and your feelings could result in a root chakra that is overactive.  Anything that has been suppressed rise to the surface more active than ever. 

(Work In Progress)

Breaking Free

There seems to be a correlation between Awakening and a shift in how one begins to see the world, or relate to it.  For me, the world was beginning to seem different to me.  There was a conspiratorial edge to all of this in the beginning which felt like an underlying sense that all was not as it should be in the world, and a general sense that all was not well here.  Something was off kilter, not right, and it seemed as though the obvious was being decried as conspiratorial bunk.

We live in a world where information is controlled, fed based on what those higher powers wish us to hear.  Its not pure evil, its simply greed, because behind it is a need to keep an old outmoded system running that does not play fair.  Its a battle for the mind, for if you can control information from the top, you can control it throughout the system.  There are numerous examples of this, and its hardly surprising, but it happens.  There remain so many unanswered questions to what happened on 9/11 that it warrants a new investigation.  Explosions in the basement observed by work crews before a plane ever hit.  Molten metal pouring out of the building even though jet fuel does not burn hot enough to cause metal to melt.  Some have offered that the metal we see is actually aluminum, which does melt at a lower temperature.  However, being involved in the foundry process and as someone who has experience melting these metals, aluminum does not get hot enough to emit radiation.  This only happens once you get above a thousand degrees.  Only then does metal show emissivity.  Aluminum wont ever do this.   When molten, it looks like liquid aluminum, or precisely like what mercury looks like at room temperature.  Its shiny.  Not brilliant as the video footage shows, red and orange sparks flowing alongside this molten metal.  And if this happened, then what caused metal to become molten like this if jet fuel could not do it?  And why would firemen observe and report on seeing "molten metal running down the rails as if you were in a foundry" weeks after the collapse?  This is not explained.  Its a technical impossibility, and its not something that will go away.  Despite this and independent testing results that show conclusively the presence of an engineered form of thermite, something called "nano-thermite" which is used to not just cut steel, but vaporize it, the public still wants to follow the story fed to them by mainstream press, which is that nothing untoward is going on. Thousands of engineers and architects who have looked into what happened on that day have banded together to explain to the public that the collapse of the three buildings on 9/11 (there were three not two, and each were perfectly symetrical collapses) were a statistical impossibility.  Never in the history of steel frame buildings has ANY building collapsed due to fire.  The towers were designed to take a direct hit from a large airliner.  While the jets that struck the buildings on that day were larger than the ones that were used to determine how to protect from such catastrophic collapses, many architects who have studied this issue closely tend to agree that what happened on 9/11 simply does not follow facts in the real world.

There were explosions in the basement BEFORE the first plane hit, for example.  Numerous eyewitnesses reported explosions going off before the planes hit, explosions so severe and so close (not from above) that they reduced the basement levels to rubble.  These explosions were described as like grenades that went off over a long time frame.   These were not explosions from above, but came from the basement, pushing witnesses upward, not pushing down ceiling times as happened when the plane DID hit (these are two very different kinds of events and centered in the building very differently).  Some videos on this here.  While it has been edited in a distracting way, the testimony is important. 

It is interesting to note that Rodriguez and his coworkers contacted the 9/11 Commission to tell them their story, to include the evidence of explosions before planes hit the buildings, and their calls were never returned, there was never any follow up and their accounts were never entered into the evidence as presented.  Further, when a NIST official gave a talk to media about their findings, he was asked about molten metal in the buildings, he claimed no knowledge despite numerous well documented and televised accounts of officials and citizens all observing extremely high temperatures, hot enough to melt steel. Even Rudy Guiliani commented to the 911 Commission that there were temperatures in excess of 1500°F. in the rubble (metal glowing red hot) months after the buildings fell, and yet NIST has continued to deny the evidence before them.  For engineers and scientists, this is not mere incompetence.  Regardless, many Americans  continue to buy into the mainstream press's assertion that all of this was caused by planes crashing into the buildings. 

When we entered the Vietnam war, our most decorated naval ship the U.S.S. Liberty was attacked by unmarked fighter jets that officers aboard described as being consistent with Israeli fighter jets strafed the carrier for an hour, seeking to sink it.  On a phone call with President Johnson, Macnemara overheard Johnson calling off air support by a fleet in the area, saying "call off the wings!"  explaining that he wanted to see the ship go to the bottom of the ocean.  The assumption was that Johnson wanted to garner as much outrage over this incident as possible in order to have a reason for entering the Vietnam War.  Without a direct attack, it would have been hard for Johnson to rationalize or make a case for entering such an action as he did.  We now know that the Gulf of Tomkin Incident as it is now called was part of a false flag operation that brought us to war.  For those who think this kind of behavior is an aberation, or an isolated event,  consider that only a few year previous, during the Kennedy Administration,  acts of false flag terror were submitted by a member of the Joint Chiefs as a way to get the U.S. to attack Cuba. Some of the incidents called for the U.S. to shoot down a U.S. plane full of college students returning from Spring break in South America over Cuban airspace and blame it on Castro.  Another scenario suggested flying a plane out of a Chicago airport, land it at a CIA base, place the same numbers on the tail as was on the commercial liner and fly it over Cuban airspace where it could be shot down by our own missiles while blaming it on Castro.  The memo suggested that by filming fake footage of bodies being burned, the public out cry would be so great that a war with Castro would be all but assured.

You can download the original document, obtained via a FOIA request here.

Now, for as doom and gloom as all of that may seem, the other side to the shadow in all of this is the light, and this is the good part.  Part of waking up is seeing the world for what it is and choosing to experience the light rather than staying in the shadows, which is where the likes of Dick Cheney have remained.  Waking up means seeing things more clearly, but also not just falling for the truth of shadow, but the truth of our divinity.  We have freewill, free choice, and part of this means choosing the light.  Only there can you laugh at the absurdity of what we have chosen to build here, the idea that this is all there is.  It isn't.  Within us is the equal capacity for shadow and light, and part of waking up is choosing where we are going to focus our energies.  For as hard as it might be to know that bad things happen and people lie about it, the truth is, this has always been the case.  People have all chosen to do good or ill because of free will.  By changing ourselves, by choosing the light, we actually change the vibration of Collective Consciousness.  We change our species from the inside out.  By loving ourselves first, we are more able to love others in a divine way, which means that the good rain falls on ALL.  This bestowal is what the divine does.  Its life force, which is love and compassion flows to all. What we choose to do with it is a choice.  Always we have choice.  And beyond this world is the womb of the All.  For as precious as it is here, this is not all there is.   Its a ride, a glorious ride, but nothing more.  Its the universe waking up in its dream and asking "Hey, what the heck?  What was I just dreaming a moment ago!!!???"  And so we wake up. Piece by piece, person by person, we turn this inside out. Sweep out the cobwebs and hope that the species continues to wake up.  As this happens, though, there is a kind of drawing back on the part of those not awakened.  The balance is upset as a shift occurs. We do not need to continually teeter between the yin and yang.  We can shift the gears and enter a whole new way of operating.  We can bring it up a notch.  The next step will be people waking up who will have to grapple with their shadow side who have stayed in the shadows.  They will need a lot of compassion, love and understanding so that they will not languish in fear but marinate themselves in the bliss that their souls have craved since day one.  Sure, there are killers amongst us. Killers of people who are themselves immortal.  Bodies will die, but souls will continue. Am I minimizing our place here as a species?  Never.  In truth, this is like a dream within a still larger dream.  Its a lovely dream with money to be made, lives to protect, ideas to defend, and battles to be fought.  But still, its a bit like a dream, and we are in it.  Why do you think we have so many movies touching up on this idea lately? Its swimming inside the Collective.  Its gurgling up.  We are taking the Red pill. The deeper truth is that we dont need to take a pill and we wont see the truth as something horrible, just as it is, which is the result of greed and shortsightedness.  Its why Jesus turned over the tables in the Temple over their hoarding the half-sheckle which was the form of tribute paid by the Jews at that time.  it was a money making scheme and the bankers were allowed into the holiest of places, the Temple.  Well, folks, the same thing is happening now.  You and I can choose different.  We can do the good and BE the good.  And then, as we grow in number, how many crooked people will there be to fill Congress of the White House?  Slowly, the face of even our worst institutions will change.  It wont be a sudden revolutionary movement, but a gentle rocking of that baby into another dream where something different is experienced and brought to be.  Maybe you think that is pie in the sky or fanciful thinking, but its how it will happen short of violent overthrows and aggressive acts.

When we wake up we will simply say "no more" and because all of us will be saying it, there wont be a need to change anyone's minds.  For we will Be That.

Waking up is a pretty radical shift at first.  Over time, its seen in broader perspective.  This is not to say that we sit idly while unjust things happen.  You have a voice and YOU can choose to use it.  Will it matter if the powers that be don't want change?  Slowly, change will come for we WILL be the change.  We will teach our children something different and they will respond without even thinking.  They will esteem this new way without thinking twice.  Slowly, we will change.  We have already changed.  We have shown that a man or woman doesn't have to be judged just for the color of their skin.  We followed the Constitution, and we did so largely peacefully as Dr. King's movement showed, and just as Gandhi's movement showed.  It CAN be done.  And it can change the world.  It already has.  And it will continue to do so.

Do not fear the shadow, for it is a new dawn. Soon, it will all be light....

Coping With Kundalini

With kundalini, you soon see how everything is connected.  You feel it.  You might even feel yourself becoming it.  The physical body is caught up in this trans-formative process, and there are some very physical things you can do to make its presence in your body easier to deal with.

I think that it depends on where you are in your process.  I lived with kundalini for about four years before things began to get difficult.  I certainly had some difficulty before then, but nothing compared to when I began to question my experience, which led to a deepening of the energy within me and this highlighted the issues within that had lain more dormant as the energy seemed to have a place to reside, but was, I think, coming up against strong internal resistance on my part, albeit subconscious in many ways, against its going deeper.  When I began to work on loosening blocks in a much more conscious way, life became very difficult because the inrush of kundalini through all these knots made things very painful.  I think its possible to live with kundalini but have its energy only go so far.  Its as though it wont go where it is not welcomed, and while some would see the coming of kundalini as nothing they ever asked for, it is my feeling that on a deeper level it was most certainly bidden, and if you consider that there was something moving deeper within you that did bring this on, you are in a better position to begin to consider why this is so, and to feel less like a victim of this torrential energy and more as someone who has just awakened and is now growing up, so to speak.  I know that when I ask the energy to come on stronger in order to do some work, it does.  Sometimes it feels like it is kicking my behind, but I know that this pain or difficulty is merely lack of alignment to its perfect energy. I know that I did not have the trouble with adrenaline until I began working to remove blocks.  Only then did adrenaline rev up like nobodies business. 

The effect that this has on the adrenals and kidneys is very real.  Some can suffer adrenal burn-out, and having adrenaline pumping through you in this way can be very wearing on the body.  This can be part of the trial by "fire" that many talk about. But one thing is for sure; for as hard as this part of the journey was, it taught me come hell or high water how to be the captain of my own ship, which meant learning how to flush out latent fear in my body and soul and to get a grip on my physiology and actually learn to control it.  Your body will mirror your feelings perfectly, but in awakening, you might be a few steps behind what your body is trying to tell you by having anxiety or fear or adrenaline going full tilt.  Consider that kundalini IS a few steps ahead of you and is trying to tell you something.  the adrenaline side of this experience, when it winds up being a daily phenomenon until it finally gets resolved can be incredibly trying.  Maddening, even.  But if you have encountered this, you are not alone and it IS possible to get through it.  Many have, and you now have it in you to do so also, if there is stored fear in you somewhere.  I do suggest surrounding you with people who either understand you very well or who love you unconditionally and regardless of whether they understand or even KNOW what this kundalini is all about, are willing to be there to help you talk you down out of a tree when you need it, if you need it.  Sometimes the best thing that you can do is listen to a great joke or blow off steam in moments like these.  If it feels like you have been gritting your teeth for the last week and a half, its time to do something that will break this cycle and focus you in a different way.  there is something that some call kundalini syndrome and it has resulted in some people kind of losing it.  You have to stick with this and work through it in order to dredge the latent material in your psyche.  It is curious because its less about chucking something out the door as its simply not mattering anymore.  More on this towards the end....

Listen to what your body is telling you.  If you are not hungry, eat when you are hungry. If you are a strict vegetarian and feel an urge to eat meat, this is not something you should ignore.  If you can't bring yourself to eat meat, at the very least look into what it is your body is craving and seek to supply it in other ways if you can. Some foods I have found that have been very calming have been curry, cantaloupe, and eggs have been a very good "smooth" form of protein that I do not have many reactions to. I have read that any kind of melon can have a calming effect.  I often have issues with meat sometimes, especially beef.  Not always. We pump all kinds of things into these animals and we do not have good ways of slaughtering them. All of this can be felt in the heightened state of kundalini. Soy has estrogenic compounds in it, but Mung beans are almost as high in protein as soy without these compounds which might have a calming effect, and they might also have the effect of working against your own hormonal output. I have found that greek yoghurt, while higher in fat than other yoghurt, it also has a lot of protein too and tends to stick with you.  Peanut butter has been a staple for a morning meal on toast and is something that can stick with you if you want to stay away from meat.

  To this end, there are things you can do to help support your body during this time.  One of these is simple, but very useful.  Its exercise.  Some have said that exercise can make it worse, but my experience has been that it helped to burn adrenaline at a critical time when I was in a kind of misery physically.  If this get to this point, strong exercise can do the job.  Realize, the reason why there is so much adrenaline is because of fear rising to the surface.  This is not JUST a physical effect, but one brought on by kundalini pushing fear out of your subconscious self into waking consciousness.  As hard as that is, it is what Kundalini will do.  It is a very hard blessing because it will clear you out in the end.  When I say exercise, it may need to be strong exercise in order to burn off the adrenaline.  Understand that adrenaline is there to power your muscles.  So power it.  The adrenaline comes in proportion to the presence of fear that has long been suppressed. During some of the hardest times with this, I had a bicycle that I would ride.  My bike is a mountain bike, so I took it off-road and rode up and down grassy hills around parks and in natural locations.  Instead of feeling totally jazzed, I felt a measure of peace after these rides.  This is of course a stop-gap measure, but if this is a big issue, a painful one, then for the time being exercise that will get your heart rate up will most likely be the best.  The other side of this is learning to deal with the fear, which I will get to later.

One thing that was pointed out to me by a friend who had lived with kundalini her whole life and who was educated in eastern practices, was how the eastern cultures tend to have an alkalizing diet.  It is in these cultures that there seems to be the greatest awareness off and perhaps incidence of awakenings.  Is it possible that the by products of adrenaline,the fight or flight end of our experience, creates compounds in the body that serve to keep it in a frightened state?  A kind of chemical reminder that we are still very much swimming in the chemical soup of fear and the shadow side of ourselves?  Alkalizing the body serves to actually change the body from acid to alkaline.  Its totally unintuitive, but the results are that it does.  One way that I introduced this into my day to day regimen was to put two teaspoons of organic apple cider vinegar in water.  I eventually got to a place where I would just quaff a tablespoon of it straight with a good dose of water to chase it down. I tried to do this twice a day.  Another way would be to use lemon juice.  You can also make sure that you eat salads that have vinegar in them as well.  One things you will need to watch is how it might effect your digestion.  Normally stomach acid is very strong, but in some people who have problems with acid reflux, making sure you don't aggravate your condition with the addition of more acid could be something worth considering.  The other side of this was how to help the kidneys, because it is the kidneys that are involved in the production of adrenaline.  One very good tonic is organic wild cherry juice.  It can be had as a concentrate added in the same way to water as the vinegar.  Take a few times each week, it is supposed to help support the kidneys.  At the core of this, though, is learning how to deal with adrenaline.

I am of the opinion that the reason why the adrenaline is there in the first place is because of an unresolved issue concerning fear.  Kundalini highlights this and builds on it in a kind of unmerciful way where everything is put under the spot light so WE SEE IT instead of just shoving it down.  We may not even know WHY we are shuddering from the adrenaline and having such a hard time of it, but I do believe that the whole purpose of the adrenaline syndrome is to learn how to transform or transmute it in the body.  This is huge.   HUGE.  Being able to figure out intuitively how to change this set up in your body, this end of the chemistry is a form of spiritual alchemy.  We can analyze it all we want, but ultimately it requires an ability to gain some control over our bodies and how they react to this chemistry.  Adrenaline, I suspect, is only part of the story.  In fact, I believe that my bliss is not simply a dopamine/serotonin cycle but a cycle of adrenaline as well (but in a much smaller dose---we have kind of gotten off track with our feelings and this has affected our body chemistry).  Adrenaline mixed with dopamine gives me the "high" that feels perfect with kundalini.  I also suspect that most addictions to opiates (which are dopamine mimics) and to speedy drugs like cocaine and amphetamines (which mimics the adrenaline) are the inner yearnings we have towards trying to find a balance of them in our bodies, a subconscious effort to bring about a balancing of them, and thus a craving for them.  I think this MIGHT work in the beginning of using such outside forms of the chemistry, but it quickly devolves as it almost always does with addiction into something that wrecks health and life.  We recognize this chemistry, but learning how to foster it in our bodies is the trick. Its very much like learning how to ride a surf board.  Not too much forward, not too much back.  You have to be in balance on this mighty wave.  Its a kind of way, very hard at first, for finding that balance point where through feeling (feelings are the catalyst for all our chemistry internally I feel), we are able to steer our own vessels into waters that were entirely unknown before all of this took place.

So let's think about fear for a moment.  Why do we have fear? And what does fear accomplish?  Most often fear is the result of something that has happened in your past that created a strong memory.  We all know that the event is in the past.  It is gone now, but we carry the fear into the present and even project it into the future.  This does two things. It takes us out of the present which is the point of all power and it also keeps us from meeting the world in a more direct way free from prejudicing it with fear.  The cycle of fear continues until the fear is either faced or let go.  Learning the art of surrender is a powerful way to stop the cycle of fear. But how do you do this? It takes some doing.  It takes being willing to relax in the moment and tell yourself that there is nothing you can do about the fear. Fear is from the past, not something in the present.  You are merely projecting it into now or some unknown future and it robs you of what resides in both. Tell yourself that there is nothing you can do about whatever you are fearing.  What happens if you feel fear but feel like it is so irrational that you do not know its source? The same. Tell yourself as you sit quietly breathing that there is nothing you can do about the fear except to let it go.  You tell yourself that you will, step by step, reduce your reliance on this frame of mind.

Breath in deeply and slowly and as you do imagine that you are breathing in nothing but the present.  You are not breathing in the past. Imagine that the air of the present is not touched by the past and that what you are breathing in is perfectly pure air free from all troubles. As you breathe in, imagine this pure air exchanging itself and as you breath out carbon dioxide, you are also ridding your body of a fine layer of fear.  With each breath, you are doing this.  As you think through the day, focus on your breathing.....and all you have to do is imagine this, image it in your mind. This type of practice is very powerful because we go where our thinking goes. If we can imagine a different outcome or condition, then this will eventually take hold. Its how we are. We are  like computers that get programmed. What you are doing is reprogramming yourself.  In order for this to work, you must work at it and give it time to work. The next type of breathing is very helpful and the most potent and it involves breathing in one nostril with a finger covering the other nostril for a number of breaths.  Four would be a good place to start.  Then switch to the other nostril and do that four times.  Do this as many times as you feel works for you.  it does a very good job of calming your mind. You see, your mind has been allowed to run this fear program for years, and now you are beginning to put that program to an end.

Relaxation CD's  have also been very helpful for me.  The best have been the ones where someone is simply guiding you with a minimal of other bells and whistles.  I used a CD for dealing with anxiety at the hardest point of my process.

Another very simple yet effective way of dealing with energy is to lie on the ground to help discharge it.  Another is simply surrender, a practice that will loosen your field up some and just allow all this energy to flow. If one area feels tight, it suggests there are knots there.  Kundalini can help to dissolve these, but it seems to work best when absent having any understanding of what the block is about. You do not need to consciously know all the time what these are. Allow yourself to be led. Consider knowing is not necessary.  Feeling will lead you there and using the mind can sometimes get in the way. The mind is not always the greatest tool for getting yourself around this. Surrender will tend to allow the flow to increase and also run more smoothly.  If it all feels too much, surrender more. This is the act of realizing what you are deeper down.  If this brings on anxiety, its most likely the presence of ego. The only way around this is to let the ego drift into the background. It can cause most problems especially early on. The phenomenon of "ego death" which I consider a misnomer, is a rearrangement of the ego within the self so that things function more smoothly.  Ego has been put front and center where it occupies the same space (kind of) as the essential self should.  Moving it out of the way will help immensely.  However, this can be a difficult process.  Some call it crushing, a kind of collapse of all kinds of artificial constructs that we thought were so important. But this is not the end, but the beginning. You will find great relief in letting the ego go.  This is why meditation can be so helpful because the ego has a tendency to drift back and away.  In sleep this happens in the normal course of dreaming, too.

Meditation can be helpful because of its naturally relaxing tendencies.  Allowing the self to quiet down and open so one can flow can be very helpful in coping with kundalini. Sometimes it can also make one feel less grounded, so you have to decide for yourself what works best.  I am of the mind that an increase in the energy is a positive thing, and the only problem lies in feeling safe with it. If the energy feels adversarial, it is best to realize that this is not coming from the energy but from you.  The energy is colored by this and it will seem it is true.  Removing the "problem" is the solution. Surrender.

I have used Chi Gong (also spelled Gung) during my process that helped a lot. Chi Gong means "energy work" and involves a very low impact physical workout.  It helps to move Chi in the body. I found it helped to dissolve blocks very effectively.  I spent close to a year going to these weekly classes that were held by a man who had learned White Crane Chi Gung that is part of the Shaolin tradition. I think it is good if you have a teacher who is calm and supportive.  You don't need someone yelling at you or barking orders. Ordering a DVD on this type of work could be good for a daily routine alone if need be.

Another aspect of healing blocks is shaking.  Many people will go into shaking fits when kundalini hits them. There is a reason for this.  The instinctual self repsonds to try and remove or make the way easier for the energy to move and shaking will do this.  This is just another form of movement.  People who reach ecstatic states most often do so with shaking and even jerky movements. There is a reason for this. It has a neurological, energetic, and physical basis. Do not feel funny about shaking or moving.  It is nature's way. Even vigorous dance will no doubt make you feel much better. Past trauma and hurt and other issues are lodged in the body on all levels and this shaking helps.  People who do energy work in the body find that by moving the body this can help release blockages.  Ida Rolf had a very aggressive form of deep tissue massage that she found helped to release old impacted emotional material.  You need someone who knows intuitively where to work on you in order to locate and then liberate your body of this material.  Shoulders and upper back can be a popular place for material to rest, but so can the abdomen, the hips, and other joints. Often people will lodge a lot of emotion at the location of an old injury. Anything lingering from than injury can often be found there.  It happened to me that I had emotional material lodged in my shoulder after an injury there.

Movement is something I am dealing with in my book Waking The Infinite, and in it I have observed through numerous traditions that movement, even ecstatic movement, serves an important function in the physiological connection to the effects that trauma has on the body.  As you awaken, I am sure you have discovered a whole new way of sensing energy.  Things are much more apparent in this way, and you feel through the energy body to the point where you can feel others around you.  You feel patterns of past trauma in others as energetic patterns that can be translated into etheric pain that gets referred to the body as well.  This is where extreme stomach tightness can occur, headaches, and pain in the heart or just about any other part of the body.  As a result, you can become more acutely aware of those issues you have in your own etheric body and which have become lodged also in your physical body since the etheric and physical feed perfectly into one another.

Something that can also help you is to simply use intention.  If you reach a place where you feel like you are all out of answers, if you feel like you can use this method, do.  Ask the universe to send you the resources that will serve your highest.  You do not need to know what this will present to you as.  You can also ask for more specific things like a teacher or assistant of some kind.  The more open you are to its coming in many different forms, the quicker it can happen.  This could come as a person or it could come in the form of a book or an experience or conversation with someone who mentions to you just what you need without your having ever mentioned it. If you have not yet experienced the power of this during awakening, it is time you tried.  It is known that there are these odd events called synchronicities that happen in greater number with those who are awakened. If you look up synchronicity on this blog there should be some examples of my own experiences with it. It does no good if you simply do not believe in it. The way for it to work is to hold the hope or wish as clearly in your mind as you can. Imagine how you wished for some toy as a child. Do you remember how excited you were when you wished like that as a child?  You need to do that and as you do, hold it only for a moment and then entirely let it go. Give it to the universe.  Don't hold onto it.  The energy has to do its work FOR you. It does no good to simultaneously wish and then feel like it can never happen because what you are doing is asking the universe not to give it to you. Its going to mirror you perfectly, so send the wish with as much hope and excitement as you can and let it go. Put your mind on other things and forget about it. I do this all the time and its as simple as making the wish and then not obsessing over it.

If I were to tell you how this has worked for me over the years, you might have a hard time believing it.  And yet, if you let yourself consider it as a possibility, you can see for yourself how you can begin to utilize this very powerful ally in your own journey.  You do not need to know how it will work.  If you ask for something that does not come it could be two things.  It could be you have a competing belief or it is somehow not right for you. I do not mean to say that it wont ever be right, but trust also that there might be other things more pressing that you have to get through. If you can feel a sense of trust in this vast power that will do what is best for you, it can open you up to just the right attitude that you need.  Consider being led.  Let your own will become the will of the universe.  Feel devotion to it, feel peace that everything will work out as it should.  You are small, and you may not be able to see the bigger picture.  This also does not mean that you should simply sit idly by for it to happen. Follow your instincts too. Make yourself ready or open by living your life.  Allow accidents to happen.  Follow a hunch. It does not always have to make sense.  I have made my greatest discoveries when I pulled a random book off a shelf or followed a completely odd urging in my head to go somewhere or do something.  These can be the things that can lead you to the resources that you didn't even know exist.

One of the single most effective stances during awakening is courage.  Being willing to meet every single skeleton in your closet and let it go is a powerful tool at your command.  This is important, at least in my experience because a very interesting things happens when you are sitting there at two in the morning aware that there is some great wall of menace bearing down on you as you sit in meditation; when you let yourself step into that wall of menacing blackness without fear, a very curious thing happens; the fear is transformed into a sense of buoyancy, even of bliss.  What you thought one moment was the end of you was in truth a new beginning.  Whenever I have stepped into the unknown in this way, the very nature of the thing before me changed.  What once was like a giant dragon became a small mouse.  I laugh; over and over I seem to have to relearn this!  My goodness!  So in the beginning of awakening, you might be faced with something that might paralyze you with fear, but in that moment be brave and ask yourself; are you going to die from some faceless fear?  Will this REALLY be the end of you or your ego or identity?   I think of that old scratchy recording of FDR saying "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself" I smile because you know, he was right!  Its the FEAR that is the problem.  Once it is gone, most challenges tend to pale in comparison.  Your faceless fear (okay, so let's say it has a face....its still being driven by fear after all....so consider that) can morph and change into anything because it really is beyond all reality.  By facing it, you bring it into reality and realize that the REALITY is that within you is this divine creature seeking to emerge (really!!).  Try it sometime, and I think you will see what I mean.  You are actually in the process of shedding layers and for a time these layers might project themselves against the wall of your fear and make you concerned.  But I encourage you to take courage.  Believe in yourself.  Be easy on yourself.  yes, we have all fallen short, yes we have all done things we are not proud of.  If you must seek forgiveness or confess, then do so.  Do what you need to do to reach  a place where you feel right with the world.  Piercing the depths of our own ignorance and fear is one of the single most laudable acts a soul can make here on this planet!

See, when we fear something, the fear itself serves as an attractant for whatever that vibration is of that thing that is upsetting or dogging you.  You are like velcro inside with loops custom made for whatever that thing is that is upsetting you.  Your job is to let go of it, and when you do, all those little loops just relax and it just slips away.  Its very much like this!  By changing your own inner energetics, you make it to these things that were drawn to you or that still hang around you to just go away.  This is so for old hurt or trauma, to people in your life to even etheric critters that might show up to give you a scare. Like attracts like....and it might only be a fragment of like that is in you, but you really do have to let go and the rest will slip away.  Layer by layer you will go at this, so do not be surprised that when you clear your heart center one time, you wind up going back to it a year or two later for deeper clearings.  Its almost like dimensions within your energy field.  the Hindus, I have come to learn call these Etheric Sheaths (and I have a post on these, so you can search using that term and find the post).  Its like you go from one dimension within one chakra center only to find that you emerge into another world within that chakra, and then another and another.  This I think will take some time, and do not be concerned about it, because once you get to that point, you WILL be in a much better place (its all a process, layer by layer....).  So don't feel defeated if you make a big release only to find yourself having another in the same place.  It wasn't that you didn't do it completely or somehow failed at it, you certainly DID release material, there was just more of a different vibration.  It might be a smidge of something at the first level that has to be flushed or it might be a block deeper down.  Be easy on yourself.  Keep your perspective!  And when worse comes to worse, don't forget to laugh!  I mean it!  Don't get to serious!  Ego loves serious, and you need to keep the bugger at bay.  And when we laugh, we most often tend to put things back int perspective:  "Oh my goodness!  I was so serious about that big knot in my chest!  Now that its gone, I see it wasn't such a big deal as I made it out to be!"  Just go easy on yourself, okay?  And if you can't do that, realize that you are here at a time when the vibration on the earth is changing and its changing in part due to YOU and thousands, perhaps even millions like you in an event that is unlike another in history (hows that for revving your ego engine?) which is that there are more people now having spontaneous awakenings than at any other time in recorded history!  I think that is pretty awesome, don't you?  What does it mean?  Well....that's for another day.  For now, chop wood, haul water!

I am a firm believer that as you seek, so shall you find. Doors will be opened to you as you ask for them in the right way.  Believing in the possibility but not dwelling on it or anticipating their happening has always been the best key to their happening. In this way, they feel entirely effortless, and this is I think the whole point. Things can be much easier if you let them. If something is tripping you up, maybe some pain in your field is resulting in fear or hurt.  Maybe through movement or a simple act of forgiveness, you allow some long lost issue to simply drop away, one that had gone past its due date.  And as it does, the hurt resolves into its opposite, which is joy.  And love.  Being able to do this kind of work for ourselves is a profound act of love towards the self, the soul.  it seeks to make YOU right before trying to make the world right. Since the world IS inside of you, getting better inside you is a fabulous and very healthy way to find authentic happiness and fulfillment.
I hope you find the magic that is your own soul peering back at you through these marvelous events that are great gifts!