The Secret of Breath

Breath of life.

Its huge. 

Real huge. 


We have a lot of images attached to this, and its meaning looms large. Our past is dotted with its undeniable traces through esoteric traditions as well as methods and means not so hidden or obscure;  breath of life encompasses so much.

The secret in Awakening is that breath has a two-fold meaning.  Your body must take in breath moment by moment, like the movement of your heart, this breath must continue. It is continuous, and just as you breath in the vital oxygen, your etheric body breathes in prana, Qi, or life force.  This breath is constant, and it has a kind of metabolism because what it takes in, it transforms, creates in a co-creative way. As you live, the creative force is moving through you in a very literal way.  This energy, which we say supports all life is the stream of energy upon which we ride.  Truth is, we ARE this force.  We cannot be killed, stilled, or taken away from the stream.  We and the stream are One, and this is where things can get incomprehensible.  Be ready for paradox, be able to handle a mystery.  If you can, you begin to step into the stream of life force and its great wonders.

In the yogic traditions all over the world, breath becomes so vital. The shaman out on the vast prairie holds up his pipe to the sky as he takes in the smoke; breath made visible.  A sacrament to the All.  One pipe becomes All.  Underpinning it is breath.  Breath is life, power, life force, prana, Qi. We breathe this in all the time.  Thoughts and feelings can hinder its movement. We can so restrict its flow that it feels as though we do not have enough of its energy.  In an Awakening, though, you can begin to feel the movement of this energy as though it is pure bliss.....because it is. If you resist its flow, it turns into tension and pain.  The traditions, though, speak of straight spine, lotus, half lotus, eyes focused on third eye, tongue on the roof of the mouth. All of this has a purpose, it is said, which is to help facilitate breath as well as the flow of energy in the body.

By breathing, you calm the body.  If you breath in one nostril and the next slowly, you will find the troubles of a moment ago will likely completely dissolve.  A student who was upset in my class tried this method and cried out "Man, this is like opium!  What are you doing to me?"  Well, I wasn't doing anything.  The student was merely using the motion of physical breath to effect a very energetic change.  This reminded the feeling, the emotional side to just calm down.  And so it works. The body can be used to remind the etheric body what it needs to do.  Breathing is an important pat of this.  The etheric, though, has such a fine stream of energy flowing through it, its more like its a plant absorbing CO2 through its leaves, through all of its surfaces.  This is how we "breathe" in prana.  Our energy centers, the chakras, are powerful funnels for this energy as a way of corresponding to the different pitches or qualities of our being as defined in energy.  Just as a song is not composed of just one note but a series of notes, so is our energy composed of a scale of harmonics. 

If breathing helps you get there, great.  I think breathing is very important, but the deeper truth is that your energy body brings this energy down from on high into the physical system in a process that is more like a cycling wave with eddies and streams, our root bringing it in at the base, and all other centers bringing in different wavelengths of the same energy of the cosmos.  While it certainly feels as though the energy of an awakening proceeeds from root to crown (not always; it can jump around and certainly does this).  The thing to realize is that each energy gate or chakra is just that; a gateway.  Each chakra will draw into the body certain frequencies of energy for the good of the whole. Each gateway is a world of its own, like a dynamic organ that is part of a larger whole.  It is a vibration of consciousness in a body of being that operates as a whole.  Consciousness, then, is an assemblage of parts....particles....just as your physical body is made up of vast continents of cells all with their own individual consciousness helping to cooperate in this loving and caring way for the good of the all.  And on top of this rides your own particalized consciousness which can delve into the ocean of this wave of being that makes up boundless numbers of particles of awareness which all give up some part of themselves in their focus in order to be part of the whole.  In doing this, none are diminished, they give up their focus of being singular in order to dream BIG. When you awaken, you are that cell that suddenly begins to dream big and suddenly finds itself riding that forward edge of WAVE consciousness! 

Particle/wave.  Dual ranges of awareness. Both are part of a larger continuum.  Breathing in, breathing out.  When you breathe out, you are creating something.  Literally and figuratively.  What are you creating?  Are you aware of what just left you? You breathe out feeling, you breathe in life, which is also feeling from the universe, and will feel the bliss "locked up" in it as you become more aware-ised through such an Awakening as this.  What did you just create in that breath? Becoming mindful of what you are, who you are, and what you are becoming, helps breath to become a sacred act of purposefulness.  Forget the guilt and shame....let that go and be free in your breath. It can also help to facilitate the flow of life force into you as it tells you to calm down and feel your birthright. It brings with it the bliss of Being.  Life force is creation and creation, the act of it, is sheer bliss. Always has been, hopefully it remains that way. Creating was THE most amazing thing for the Source of all Life.  And as it breathed us out in that big long shuddering breath, what do you think It created?

This is the secret of breath.  Its a big one, an important one. When you understand that your life force is inspired (inspiration.....the primal merging of forces that bring about creation itself) then you will perhaps feel it in a new way.

Nemaste

Sublimation & Kundalini

Sublimation is  both concept and practice whereby the  fluids related to sexual operation, namely seminal and cervical fluid, are said to rise up through the spinal column into the brain where they  nourish the brain and higher energy centers, namely the crown chakra.  This method, it is claimed, is a form of alchemy, a transmutation of bodily fluids into prana.  The only problem with how it is thus described is that this process is itself a biological impossibility.  Anyone who has a grasp on biology can tell you that the fluid from our sexual organs do not cross into the spinal column to go upward into the brain.  This is due to what is famously called the blood-brain barrier, and it serves some important functions (namely keeping things like seminal fluid and other fluids that ARE part of the blood system and processed by various organs such as the kidneys and the liver) out of the brain and nervous system.  This notion has arisen as a result of how the sensation feels when one is actively sublimating.  It is a vivid feeling of pressure which rises upwards along the spinal column.  Yet, there are those who express an interest in pursuing an understanding of kundalini from a scientific perspective who continue to cleave to this notion that somehow these fluids co-mingle in the way that they are felt to do.  The creation of this model for understanding predates modern medicine and scientific models from the last hundred years, so it was very probably an effort to describe the phenomenon based on feeling alone instead of anything empirical.

In his book,  The Biological Basis of Religion and Genius, Gopi Krishna states the prevailing wisdom of his time concerning sublimation in this way:

"It is sufficient to mention here that during the whole course of this (kundalini) transformation, in addition to the blood and other fuels present in the body, every particle of powerful reproductive fluid in the system is sucked up through the spinal canal to irrigate and feed the various nerve junctions and the brain. This entirely biological operation is carried out in such an unmistakeable way that even a novice in physiology cannot fail to notice it. The semen in men is now produced in such abundance that a tiny stream rises day and night through the spine into the cranium to provide the richest and the purest food for the now heavily overworked brain cells. In women, the sexual energy and secretions involved in erotics are used as the fuel. This is a perfect example of the forethought and ingenuity of nature to keep the body equipped with all the necessities to make the completion of the evolutionary process, normally needing eons to accomplish, possible in the short span of one life."

My perspective is that as long as we use models that do not reflect reality, we will tend to misunderstand in a more precise way what is happening to us.  Ironically, the Indians and the Chinese were excellent observers of energetic phenomenon who were able to map out with great detail the channels that run through the nonphyiscal energetic matrix called the subtle body, the naddis and meridians, to a great level of specificity.  All of this was a masterstroke of accumulating a knowledge base for something that could not be touched, or seen, with our physical eyes, or monitored by physical devices.  And yet, we have this rather odd idea still circulating about how cervical fluid and seminal fluid are transmuted into prana through a physical channel which is simply not possible.  It is curious and it continues to be repeated.  Perhaps this is because of how the etheric body interfaces with the nervous system, that we get the sensation of something rising upwards in this way.  This is an example of how, lacking sufficient understanding, we as humans can sometimes come up with explanations that are less about what actually happens physiologically as it does nonphysically.  This is a distinction that is important if we are to learn how to determine the real forces at work when it comes to the action of sublimation.  After all, sublimation is itself a very important strategy or method for working through the issues that confront the individual when awakening becomes a presence in your life.  To better understand what is actually happening, I am going to offer to you some careful observations that I have made in my own life and offer them up to you for consideration, all in the hopes of forwarding understanding of this most important of phenomena.

The Brain Interprets

What I do know from my own observation over many years is that if the brain ever receives input from a source outside of the five senses, its tendency is to place that sensory input into a place that makes sense. This has been the result also of speaking with physiological psychologists who have all explained that this sort of things happens all the time.  There is referred pain as well as phantom sensations and what can only be considered an interpretation of information.  Let me explain by way of another example.

An excellent example for how the brain interprets  phenomenon that does not directly exist, is by observing what happens when a sensitive sees a human aura.  This energy, which they eyes cannot see, is still picked up by the person reading the aura.  The simple fact is that the eyes simply cannot detect the particular wavelength of energy which constitutes the human aura.  And yet, there are many individuals who claim to see them.  Being someone who reads auras himself, I have noted that what I in truth do when I see an aura is to feel it first.  When I observe very closely to what happens when I "tune in" is that I am feeling the aura with my body, with my own energy field which interacts or reads the energy directly.  This information is then translated by the brain as something akin to a phantom image which can be deciphered by me in a way that makes sense.

When I first came across this idea that we do not actually see the aura, I rebelled against it initially, but as my own mind came to accept the logic behind it, I ceased for an entire year, seeing auras.  In that time I came to peace with the idea that my brain may have been merely translating the information in the only way that it could.  After that, I began seeing them again.  I never stopped feeling them throughout this period of time, however.  There is a basis for our sensing these weak electromagnetic fields in living creatures, and we find them in the animal kingdom, most notably among those animals living in our oceans.  Similar kinds of sensory abilities are observed in other animals who have been observed as being sensitive to the weak electrical signals and electromagnetic fields around living creatures, most notably  some fish and sharks.  Some sharks have been observed, such as the Great White, to hone in on prey using a sense that is sensitive to electrical currents.  Before a shark goes in for the kill they have an opaque inner lid that comes over the eye to protect it, rendering the shark temporarily blind for the last few feet of its attack on prey.  It is this sense, marine biologists have discovered, that allows them to continue to track and locate their prey.(1)  Bolstering this observation is the fact that sharks will often chew wildly on metallic objects near boats when food is put out to attract them for study. They will often miss the food and go for metallic objects in stead, chewing wildly on them. This was a behavior that biologists observed over many years and were for a long time puzzled by it, with many surmising that it was due to a shark simply being hungry and being blind as they went in for the kill.  What biologists noted, however, was that this was a fairly consistent behavior, and sharks were often seen going for metal objects that were a good bit further away from the food being left for them to eat.   Metals emit a strong electrical current in sea water, an electrical current that would be strongest than living or recently living flesh.  Monotremes, most notably the platypus, are also known to have similar abilities.(2)  This is a sense that is called electroreception, and to learn more about it you can read this article to find out more.

There are other examples of nonphysical senses that have a physical compliment, such as healers using Reiki, a form of energy healing, to sense changes in energy as hot and cold.(3)   Healers who are sending energy to clients have reported that their hands felt as though they get hot.  While some reiki effects do seem to impact the physical body through increased blood flow in the hands, there are many effects noted that do not appear to be directly related to actual physical heat.  Some feel pressure, or lack of pressure while others will feel cold.  Again, as I have sensed in my own experience, there is something I am picking up on as it relates to this subtle energy (which kundalini is said to be) which is often expressed as a kind of sensation that begins first within as a feeling that is nonphysical and "rises" to the level of a full blown physical reaction.  It may be that the brain simply does not have a good way to deal with the idea of energy being sense directly, and so instead seeks to interpret in a way that makes sense to it.  Again, the brain is known to interpret what it may be receiving through the "ether channels" of the light body or pranamayakosha.

It is extremely common in early awakening experiences for individuals to feel very real physical pain that is the result of kundalini becoming active.  Read any account or go through the list of awakening symptoms and this phenomenon is regularly cited as being connected with kundalini.  This is, though, a nonphysical energy streaming into our awareness, if our current understanding of the phenomenon is to be understood correctly.  As doctors will most often point out to their pained clients, there is no observable reason for the pain.  There are many stories of people who have awakened going to their doctors to find the cause of their painful dilemma, only to be sent home.  As awakening continues to unfold, the force of kundalini most often tends to assist in releasing blocks within the energy body that also has the result of reducing this pain.  In my experience, this pain was itself a form of extreme tension that was held so strongly by the body or reacted to by the body so that it felt like pain. Upon careful observation, in every case, the pain emerged from a state of emotional or psychological discomfort.  The release of the pain always came from an ability to surrender, to let go, to engage in what can be considered a non-rational method for dealing with a problem involving buried or latent trauma, pain, or old hurt.

Very recently I was reminded of how difficult this process was as I went through something poorly described as "ego death" by a reader of Waking The Infinite. It is interesting how often people in this situation describe it as feeling as though their bodies are being squeezed in a vice.  I experienced this same kind of pain in varying levels and in various places in my body as a sensation that was akin to having the bed of my fingernail being pressed very hard until it hurt.  This pain would persist for months until I was able by hook or crook, to release the old pent up block of material, after which the pain would transform into a radiant sense of joy and bliss.  I observed this same condition play out  many dozens of times over the course of a few years where the most difficult sensations of pain were released.  There are many other people who also describe these blocks in the same way, which is an exaggerated form of tension which begins to take on the sensation of pain.

My sense is that many people simply have a block when it comes to considering that something nonphysical could feel so physical.  It is my suspicion that when faced with such vividly charged emotional energy that we do the same thing that is done when there is no direct physical sense available to express a deeper truth that is taking place within the individual.  This is a place that is perhaps difficult for some people to entertain because it moves away from the physical senses, and we are anything if not overly tuned to the traditional five senses as the arbiters of our experience here on earth.  But just as kundalini will often reveal, there is much more than just the five physical senses.  But how we become aware of these nonphysical senses may create something of a challenge for some people when faced with them since they stream into awareness along untested or unknown pathways.  It may also help to explain why we wind up with ideas that seem to straddle the anything-goes world of energy with the more orderly realm of the physical.  As energy moves upwards along the charged and electrically capable spinal column, there is an accompanying sense of SOMETHING happening as the pitch or vibration of the energy is changed.  This becomes a near-universal sense of pressure, a pressure that feels like a fluid is moving.  It is my consideration that we begin thinking anew about these phenomenon and take a page from the book of the physiological psychologists who know that when faced with something outside the physical senses, we will most often have a brain that will do its level best and interpret this very real phenomenon for us.  It is just as likely that the pressure that is felt is the effect of the energy actually in the process of changing pitch or vibration as it then is passed on to a chakra cventer in the body that is able to sense it more clearly.  What was once a raw root energy and perhaps highly sexual is changed, and this change results in a feeling of upward pressure as the vibration shifts from a low to higher vibration.  We all seem to sense or know that the vibration of the root chakra is very different from the heart chakra and what the heart can feel is different from what the root can feel.  What happens when you transmute an energy in the root?  We all know that energy does not go away, it simply changes form.  In this case, we are the energetic vehicles responsible for the change, for the transmutation taking place.

When my third eye first activated in what was one of the more dramatic effects of an early stage of kundalini rising, I experienced a sensation that at the time I could not discern as being anything except physical, although I now know there was no possible way that it was.  In this particular experience, as I lay in bed, I felt what I knew to be someone grasping the temples of my forehead and squeezing my head for all their might. This was a very real sensation of physical pressure on my skin and muscle groups along the side of my forehead (these are the muscles that you can feel tensing when you chew, but are located well above the jaw into the side of the forehead)  At the time I imagined that some invisible guide in spirit was by my bedside doing this in order to achieve some effect.  This sensation was so vivid that I did not consider at the time that it may have had a different origin, which was as simple as a chakra opening in a dramatic way.  This happened not just once but a number of times until my entire forehead was engulfed in a series of bands of pressure that radiated out from the third eye center all the way to the back of my head. It was only after I placed my entire focus on my third eye in my inner vision that my inner sensory field exploded into a vision of a fiery eye rising up into my field of inner vision as the eye flashed from a brilliant blue to green.  You can see, though, how I could have easily thought that it MUST have been a nonphysical presence somehow acting on the physical in some unknown impossible way.  After all, how could it be otherwise?  There was no one else but me there!  What is so interesting is that one of the foremost awakening symptoms prior to full rising of kundalini is a third eye activation that results in a near-universal sensation of pressure along the third eye chakra that can often spread, in bands, all the way around the forehead to the back of the head.  And yet, for as vivid as this pressure is felt by those who go through awakening, there is simply no actual physical means by which this sensation could have been produced.  Again,  ideas like sublimation emerge due to how the phenomenon feels to us rather than stepping back and observing more closely in order to get at the underlying issue.  And for that matter, it may be difficult for some to do this.  It may be impossible for some, and so we wind up with something that sounds more like an urban myth than anything that seems logical in its explanation.  Call me pedantic, but if we are to understand kundalini in a "scientific" way as some seek to suggest they are involved in, then finding some models that fit known biological activity will need to be found.  I am just as interested in observing this phenomenon scientifically as the next person since I too have had direct experience with kundalini and would like to see some solid models developed that can help forward our current understanding.

I think that what is most likely is that the brain is an amazing device for handling an immense amount of data, but at the end of the day, it is known to interpret.  Does this interpretation fit what is possible physically?  We are surely experiencing something, yes, and it seems that our very crafty brains are doing their best to put together something that will help to communicate that something is moving upward somehow.  It may be just as likely that all of this is a sensory analog, an attempt to define something that simply cannot be sensed through our physical senses.  If so, it helps to illuminate who and what we are and also helps to guide us in understanding how we can perceive a host of phenomenon that simply isn't there in the usual understanding.  Either way, it helps to expand our knowledge of ourselves as well as what we think constitutes reality.  This idea is itself not foreign at all in the area of those who awaken as so much of the old literature about awakening is centered on undoing the "illusion" that is physical reality.  If physical reality is itself something that we can agree is illusory, then why not something as simple as how the brain deals with sensory stimuli that is coming in through less than physical channels?

How far fetched is it that the nervous system itself has the capability of reading the bleed-throughs of this electrical phenomenon called kundalini through its sheath of insulative myaline in the same way that an electrical wire running from a speaker to an amplifier can sometimes pick up signals from the environment outside it?  And indeed, could it be that all phenomenon like mind reading, reading auras and all the rest, comes from a hitherto unknown capacity for the nervous system to pick up on these "stray" outer signals which are not part of the physiology as modern medicine has suggested exists?   For if that is possible, then it is just as possible that something like changing vibrational energy in the light body can be felt and picked up and interpreted by the brain as a feeling of delicious energy rising upwards as a fluid pressure.

To understand how spinal and cerebral fluid is produced these articles may be of some help in explaining how this has been observed in a scientific context:

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Where_is_the_cerebrospinal_fluid_produced 

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1890044/   A bit technical,  the article explains in exacting detail how the fluid is produced.

http://www.anaesthesiamcq.com/FluidBook/fl3_6.php  This brief article also explains that this fluid is protected from the blood-brain barrier.

Sources Cited:
1. Scientific American, R. Douglas Fields, http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=the-sharks-electric-sense
2.  http://web.archive.org/web/19981206164009/http://instruct1.cit.cornell.edu/courses/bionb420.07/anelson/platypus.html
3.  http://www.iarp.org/reiki-sensations.html

As a post script to this, here is a video of Osho, also known as Bagwan Shree Rajneesh who explains some important aspects of being that bear remembering....

In my next post I will address the role of breath in all of this. Like sublimation of fluids, breath is important, but the etheric body breathes in its own way and our own physical breathing reminds us of what we need to be centered in when it comes to pranic breathing. 

Nemasté

Love is the Cure

Baby we all know this world aint for angels
its hardly fit for you and me
but lordy
lordy
the rain is coming down
its getting too hard to see.

There will be a clear blue sky
by morning
a rainbow just to make it clear
this world has been a place  of suffering
how do we fill it with hope
when its  so full of fear?

The happiness
that we find
the love we beg steal and borrow
I'd like to remember it  as it used to be
as today slips into tomorrow.

Hard world
hard hearts
will say
this life just aint fair
but a new song is coming down
raining through the sweet summer air
Love is the cure,
love is the way,
love is the only word
that has the power to say


What matters is what we do
The love and the joy we bring
Everything here might be  hard
but its the song we sing:

Hard world
hard hearts
will say
this life just aint fair
but a new song is coming down
raining through the sweet summer air
Love is the cure,
love is the way,
love is the only word
that has the power to say

What matters is what we do
The love and the joy we bring
Everything here might be  hard
but its the song we sing:

love is the cure
love is the way
nothing else will heal the world
loe is the cure
love is the way.

A New Kind of Warming

The earth is being bombarded with plumes of different forms of radiation right now from the Japanese melt-down.  What is leaking out is affecting Japan most immediately and most devastatingly, and sadly the lack of good information about the severity of the situation has left some of us wondering what on earth is going on.

My intuition has said from the start that they weren't going to report the full range of the problem, choosing to downplay it shot of being able to do something constructive.  What would have been constructive, I say, is to do what Russia did when they had a nuclear problem; they shipped their people out of the area on freight trains.  Maybe not high class transport, but it saved untold lives and untold suffering from limiting the exposure to radiation.

In the United States and Canada, we are the first after Japan to receive the radioactive fallout.  Here, just as in Japan, the numbers have been scarce and the scope of the problem has been down played.  The question innevitably becomes "what do those who are the hardest hit do?"  My answer is that its better to have the information so that something can be done in order to lessen the impact on human life.  It sorrows me to think how those on the West Coast of our country are having to bite the bullet and go on with life because its not practical for millions of people to just get up and move.  Sure, it would be a real problem and it would have a real effect on jobs, the economy, and all the rest.  But consider what the Dutch are seeing in their monitoring that does not get reported elsewhere.  We now have American monitoring sites which have been shut down or idled.  Some of the particulate cannot be read via a geiger counter. EPA limits have long been suspect and we all know that small amounts of something over long periods can do same or greater damage that larger doses for shorter periods.

I am not interested in spreading fear.  I am, however, interested in spreading information for those who want to know more and who can handle the fact that we are looking at an event that dwarfs Chernobyl.  If this kind of thing is something that will upset you, knowing more, then the suggestion I make is that you ignore the links I am providing.  Already heads of the plant in Japan have resigned because they say that the truth has not been told and they do not want to be caught in the net of deception.

So here goes.  First is a chart of radiation exposure so you can get an idea as to what causes what, just general information, nothing scary (unless you read up on what major radiation exposure can do)

Radiation Information Chart


These are forecasts and you have to look close for the English

EURAD

Flexpart models and weather info for the area near the Plant

Fukushima Weather Info

Jet stream forecasting

http://squall.sfsu.edu/crws/jetstream.html
http://arctic.atmos.uiuc.edu/CT/animate.arctic.color.0.html
http://nowcoast.noaa.gov/
http://www.srh.noaa.gov/srh/tropicalwx/satpix/nwpac_ir4_l…



The following are links to other radiation monitoring sites:

http://www.woweather.com/weather/news/fukushima?LANG=us&a…
http://eurdeppub.jrc.it/eurdeppub/home.aspx#
http://www.csn.es/index.php?option=com_maps&view=mapp…
http://www.epa.gov (click on radiation update)
http://www.irsn.fr/EN/Pages/home.aspx
http://www.nucleartourist.com/
http://www.stuk.fi/index_en.html
http://www.nisa.meti.go.jp/english/index.html
http://www.yle.fi/tekstitv/html/P867_02.html
http://www.mapion.co.jp/topics/genpatu/
http://strahlenbelastung.wo-wann-wer.de/


Information on Cesium (which is being released)

http://www.epa.gov/rpdweb00/radionuclides/cesium.html

All of this is for informational use because of what seems to be a dearth of forthcoming information.  There is a lot of Dutch testing because the Dutch were at the forefront of the testing when the Russian explosion occurred in 1998 at the power plant there.

Back in the late 40's Eisenhower was going to go from one building to the next while it was raining.  At the time he was told by a general that he couldn't do that, that they had set off some nuclear bombs in the west and there would be particulate raining down.  If they knew the risk back then, they know the risk now.  There was also a movie put out in the 80's (I think) entitled The Atomic Cafe which showed how the popular media went along with a campaign to lie to the American people about the risks associated with nuclear bombs and nuclear radiation.  This was supposedly done to limit panic in the event of air raids or other potential risks of having bombs dropped on the citizenry from our Russian neighbors (who were deemed our enemies just to keep life interesting back in the day).



UPDATE:  5/14/2001


The NILU website, which has been the most forthcoming site for radiation levels (this is the Dutch site mentioned above) has taken its information down.  Very troubling.  Why would they do this?  To quell fear?    So sorry to have to put this out there, but since others are not, this is a source that has the information which comes with a very strange connection to an old movie.  Welcome to Zardoz......some of the info is not completely clear...is this merely a way of running forecasts or inputting data or is it more?  I wish there was more information on this, but am putting this here for those interested in finding out more....

The Emergence of the Goddess

We are more than we realize.  If we can't touch taste or feel it with our senses, it means it does not exist.  This legacy has been brought to us by an aspect of humanity that became disentangled from its feeling centers, and from its intuitive grounding.  In essence, this was something that was oriented towards a more masculine and mental/egoic way of relating to the world and is for the most part, how much of us have been oriented.  What kundalini has been doing all this while has been to orient me towards something I could not see or touch or smell but which was very much alive and real within.  The problem for us is that we have grown not to trust that part of us.  What is happening right now en masse, however, is a spreading awareness of the other side of this cognitive coin which is that the more feeling and inner sensing side of our beings are getting ready to come forward in a more collective fashion.  It heralds the emergence of the divine feminine, that part of us which is of a higher order awareness, a collective self or being that resides in this sparkling world of possibility that we can very easily set aside as not real.  We have been lulled into this sense that what is inside of us is not real.  What we need most in this time is what is not real, then.  What we need is to make this unreal thing real in our world, to stop refusing its entry and begin to celebrate its presence amongst us both within and without us.

It is a recognition, celebration, and honoring, of the goddess within and without all of us;  in our bodies as an energy which connects us to the whole at the deepest core levels, as a psychic archetype that exists in our myths, legends and dreams, and as a guiding force beyond us and within us, whether we are aware or not.  By simply choosing to let Her in, we signal a change.  This change need only happen in a handful of people, numbered in only thousands, not millions, for the rules have changed in this age as it concerns this kind of change. The race has chosen a path of resonant influence as a way to effect massive planetary change.  If you read through this blog you will find other references to this principle that is alive in us in a way that is has not shown itself before.  We can quite literally bring change from the inside out.  So by choosing to honor that vibration which you know to be the goddess, you bring the collective voice to a greater volume, pitch and intensity.  This is not magic, but its not always understood, least of all by the mainstream biological sciences, but the tide is changing.

A kundalini awakening can fuel a powerful drive towards integration of a whole slew of things within, but what I have found over and over is that you have to be ready for this change.  For my own, this process has put me in very different waters.  I had built my professional career a certain way and found myself at a loss when I was faced with such a change.  I went from being someone who drove the wagon, held the reins, to stepping aside and letting that something else do the driving.  This has meant understanding all of my foiables as just that, forgiving myself as well as others, and moving on. By doing this those things which we hold onto which have a magnetic reality and which stay in our energy fields and spirits, we actually change our energy so that it sends out a different pulse, a different vibration.  For a long time I was left at total odds as to what to do in this new way of doing things.  It was quite literally like staring up at a blank screen.  I would look at it and think "Now what?..."  When we let go, we let in our higher purpose, our higher energetics, which is what I call Divine Energetics, and its a combination or matrix of physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual elements which go together to make up the world we know.  One very big thing for me is learning to build a bridge to that aspect of me which I know to be feminine.  Without the feminine in me, the masculine part of me would not have the tempering effect that it does.  By learning how to honor that part in me I am able to honor that part in a more refined way in the world, but I will say that it is not me that seems to be doing the refining but rather this refinement seems to me to be coming from those higher-source archetypes which are me but are also plugged into the larger scales of consciousness, which includes a collective awareness and a vast sea of feeling, knowing, and being (I know this sounds rather grandiose, but we need I think to become aware of where these things go and emerge from in order to not mythologize them too much or to add dogma or other distorting ideas into the mix which has been our tendency for countless centuries).  In an awakening this becomes increasingly important for not developing blind spots and for integrating those elements which come from the higher into the "lower" or more "local" parts of me which is my earthbound self.

Many years ago I had a vision that involved what I later knew to be the White Buffalo Calf Woman.  I saw her in the form of a friend, and wondered if she WAS the White Buffalo Calf Woman.  For those who do not know, White Buffalo Calf Woman is a goddess being amongst the Plains tribes that brought the sacred rites of the Lakota, and served as a humanizing force in the history of the culture.  She was also supposed to return, and we would know this time when there would be the birthing of white buffalo calves.  Well, over the last 20 years there have been a rise in the births of these white bison calves. This is seen by the Lakota as a powerful sign that we are entering an important part of the Cleansing Time upon the earth.  This Cleansing was seen as a natural response to the state of health of the earth not just as a biological organism but as a spiritual one and the Hopi have a lot to say about this.  This is a subject close to me because as a young man of 18 I found myself in the middle of an intense memory from my past life as a Native American man who was being told about a day in the future when the earth would be going through a cleansing time, a time when I would be present as a new person.  That I would witness the White Buffalo Calf Woman showing herself was not a huge surprise after I began to learn what all of this Cleansing business was about.   And while some may wait for an individual to step forward who might be the White Buffalo Calf Woman, my feeling is that She will move through the culture of earth as a whole, a giant rippling in the Collective, of our higher aspects seeking to know its divinity (which the White Buffalo Calf Woman certain is) less individually (but certainly individually) but more as a whole. This is where Her true power will radiate, this is where Goddess, in ALL of her forms will begin to be known within and without. Here her great potential will be known as we begin to learn the deepest secret of our being, of those forms that exist in seemingly small scales within us, but that spiral outward seemingly beyond us into forms that are extensions of our own consciousness and that weave us into the All (as those higher selves are themselves part of stil larger constructs of consciousness in the same way that cells in our bodies are part of a massive interconnected and cooperative whole).

These forms exist within us  and when we begin to integrate greater and greater amounts of conscious energy, we also can tip the scale towards an understanding of this identity as a collective as well as on the individual level.  I suspect that this is what we are doing.  In much the same way that Jesus spoke in many gospels (many which were not allowed into the King James' version however) that spoke of how others could embody the same spirit as he did (with the implication that we could all become Christs, joined through the father......except in his day he either could not or would not speak much of the mother, the feminine compliment in the psyche of the higher self).  In this way we can become channels for those higher aspects of consciousness which are us but which seem so expansive we have a hard time believing its even us.  But it is. My feeling is that we ought not be merely curious, but engaged in this time in who and what we are, to give all of what we are in this because each person makes a difference in the game now, and the game can be changed.  This is why we are here.  Not so long ago this was spoken by a Hopi elder: 

 

These are the End times and the people must know the truth, share what we have taught you. There can be no more secrets now if we are to survive as a thinking species through these times." "This," they say, "must be done because the dream of humanity can only be preserved through the combined efforts of all peoples, and the joining and merging of all cultures into a oneness."  (Statement of the traditional Hopi Elders as told to Cho Qosh Auh Ho Oh, a Chumash/Yaqui/Maya Native)

So as we run up to the time when we will reach what the Hopi call the "Third Shaking" we know that this is related to big earth movements, most notably volcanic eruptions which come in waves.  This last one is getting close and by watching what the Yellowstone cauldera has in store as its dome builds, we all wonder where this will come from, this third shaking.  But this shaking is the goddess, the feminine principle that is earth that reacts, responds to what has been happening upon it.  That we are spoiling her in the way we have been doing is testament to how things must change if the planet is to sustain life.  Life itself will not allow too much of itself to be destructive, to bring the rest of the house down with it without in some way responding, reacting, balancing the scales.  This is not retribution, but preservation through a principle that is built into the very core of all matter.  It is alive in our world and as we dump tritium into the Mississipi, as the destroyed Fukashima nuclear power plant is allowed to dump Mox (weapons grade radioactive material) into the ocean, or make Iraq and Afghanistan a wasteland of radioactivity through the use of DU (depleted uranium--this metal is hard enough to penetrate armor and will vaporize upon contact, spraying the area with a mist of radioactive particles akin to a dirty bomb and lethal for anyone near it at the time.....a legacy we have sown for our military and those who remain in those countries we have polluted), the earth feels all of this and will respond.  

                                            White Buffalo Calf Woman by Brett Stokes

Everything that I was shown in that vision from my past life as a native American man dreaming the thunder beings tells me that this is true and that life here will change in a rather drastic way if we continue on the path that we are on.  The Goddess, dressed in her power, will emerge to effect those changes which will change the game, life here on the planet.  

So whether we see the white buffalo calf woman in others or simply forge a stronger understanding of ourselves as an interesting mix of character traits which themselves set up an energetic dynamic that both repels and attracts depending on how each person is composed, we in one way or another learn to integrate these parts of ourselves in a way that is more harmonious and inclusive.  In this way the goddess is reflected throughout all of creation, and this I think is as it needs to be, because we are all in dire need of her in our lives.  I know I do. I know that the goddess in all of her forms continues to rise to the surface of my collective awareness, in my experiences along the path of kundalini, and so I am moved to speak this truth, to speak her through me since I myself am integrating those lost aspects of myself which I know I must surely have if I am to survive this time in a way that is born of an emergent paradigm.

 

Isis and Osiris by Susan Seddon Boulet

The one thing that I have been taught in my ancient past is that balance will be maintained.  Since there is no death, our moving from the stage while seemingly disruptive to our day to day lives, would be just another shift in our path.  Life here is not some accident, but is itself the result of careful calculations, intentional choices that resulted in a cradle that was to bring forth a broad range of life.  Some of this life exists as a vestige of what it once was (dinosaurs) while other forms are being given a voice as something larger oversees and helps move larger blocks of energy as evolution winds its way very slowly most often, but sometimes occurring in bursts of brilliant change.  We have ourselves sought to have this earth be erased of most life in order to start all over again, one through a direct hit in the Carribean/South American region, and another from a large comet.  This is the dynamic nature of creation and the great womb that is the goddess Gaia that can remove life and start over almost from scratch.

This has its reflection in the world at large. The feminine principle is coming forward in a way that it has not in ages, and it is time. it is time that we begin to understand the great power of the feminine in our world at all scales of being; what it means to us individually as well as a planet.  With a world culture that is slowly loosening its grip of control and oppression to women, as doors begin to open and a new breeze blows through our worldly institutions we recognize its our minds and hearts which are being changed, too.  It feels synergistic to me, that its bound to happen but not fated. We decide. Some days we leap forward, some we fall back.  Together, as a species, we are working out so much.  I am convinced, though, that I am here to witness the emergence of the feminine principle in ourselves coming forward into the world in a way that it has not done before.  We do this in big and small ways and every effort to bring it forward is needed, important.  In the end it seems to mirror some inner resolution going on within us collectively and individually.  The divine feminine is the collective female in everyone, the goddess, that aspect of us which is intuitive, feeling, which does not seek control but brings a sense of compassion,  care and healing into the moment.  But as we all let Her into ourselves more, we also find ourselves loosening up more, feeling an innate sensuality and ease with ourselves.

Much of the things that seemed to loom large in our mythological world was really aspects of ourselves projected into forms that we could look at, understand, know objectively.  Now is the time to do what John Campbell certainly must have suggested, which is to do the work of integrating those aspects into our day to day lives.  And this is my prayer, my simple hope in my own journey.  As we move closer to a day when we honor the Mothers in our lives, let us not forget Her in her collective wonder and how she can find her way into each of us in a way that is clear and understood and worshipped with awe, wonder, and love for all that she gives us.

Nemasté

Most of the artwork contained in this blog is the work of one of my most favorite artists.  Her name is Susan Seddon Boulet. While she passed from this world in the late 90's, she left behind a wonderful world of art that expressed her interesting mix of concerns spiritually.  Her work can be found here.


P.S.  For those who would like to know more about some of the indigenous prophecies this site does a pretty good job of bringing forth some of the issues that are at hand:

Cleansing and Entry Into the Fifth World

Getting The Hang Of It

Now for something different....

All videos are of music produced using a new musical instrument called a "Hang" which is very much like a steel drum in essence, but since its played with the hands, without the sticks and from a heavier gauge metal than the drum type, they are more melodic and "dreamy."  I hope you enjoy this introduction to such an interesting instrument.  

Ascending

Kundalini is the infrastructure for enlightenment
but is not the enlightenment.
It is the wind of change
but not the change that happens.
An awakening will support and begin to suggest
but it will never demand.

You alone determine this.

This is a wedding of the higher to the lower.
You do not dissapear
but you might begin to melt.
Some fear this melting
and will hold on for dear life.
I did.
The melting is merely moving into a gentler
and kinder kind of energy.
The real truth
is in letting the kinder energetic
into your life
a world of action and realization
on the physical plane.

Within you is a whole range of energies.
You can choose where along the dial you focus.
What you focus on will speak of where you are
and your actions will reflect this.

But no matter how hard you try with your actions
you can never contain something that you first
do not feel.
If you cannot contain it
you cannot become it
and seeking to anchor it in your life
will be a hollow body
holding nothing of consequence.
Equally do actions contain intent
if the intent is truly there.

In my case, my intent was to have my life change.
And boy did my life change!
Each time I have been careful not to curse the change
but embrace it and see it for what it is.
Sometimes the change that comes shows me precisely where I need to refine
because that lack of refinement shows up in the event or the people who come into my life.
Students, friends, customers, clients, family and more....
they all will reflect aspects
of where I am inwardly
seeking to project and create outwardly...

Going beyond now
into an infinity of nows
wedding the higher with the lower
as each creates a synthesis
and brings each into a new place.

Without Condition

True Love
is without a condition.
Freely given
like the sun shines.
I spoke to a man
who shrugged
and turned away
as I explained
that the kingdom he wanted to come
would come when we loved unconditionally.

Even a man who is hated
who has killed
or done bad things
cannot be refused this love
for this love must flow
or else it ceases to be love
but becomes corrupted.

Without unconditional love
we simply would not be.
If we treat our enemies
like they are not our enemies
we cease having enemies
and begin to see
and feel
differently.

It not a weak person who does this
but someone very strong.
It takes an uncommon woman
or man
to feel this profoundly
to let his or her heart beam so powerfully
and yet when you feel it open up in this way
you know that there IS no other way
except the way of soul death
or blindness
where an eye for an eye
leaves us unable to see
beyond ourselves.

People do not realize how steeped they are
marinating in hurt
anger
aggression.
Their hearts have been blinded by this greater world
this world we are searching for
within ourselves
every second of the day.

Giving love does not mean that you condone evil acts.
Giving love is merely what must be done to live
to be alive
to be a holy person
a Christian
or Muslim
or Zoraster
or Sufi
or a hundred different paths.

They all resolve around love
because love is the great equalizer
the great truth of our higher selves.
Perhaps instead of hating gleefully
we should let love shed some light
on why some feel the need to attack others
and see what shedding loves light there might do.
Its not a silly proposition
but the only one
that will in time
result in peace
and love.

May you find unconditional love today
and all days....

Rule #1

There are no rules
save the ones we make
and the ones we make
we better be ready to conform to
lest those who count beans
and dust motes
catch their eye on our nonconformist ways.

The way to heaven
is through the self
singular
alone.
While This is about union
and unity
each of us goes by that gateway
alone
but carried
by All.

The way forward
is not through the promise of some reward
some carrot dangled before us
for expectation leads to suffering---
and what if your karmic cords are bound up in your not succeeding
or being a failure somehow.
Bad combination.
So this can't be about you or me or uncle Ned
but the single star of your soul
as it shimmers and shines
and realizes
it is the bliss
it has been seeking.

You are the love
you seek.

We are our infinite.

You are the bliss
that you yearn for
and would die for a hundred thousand times
and the loves lost were all in a sense illusory
for the fact that no love every existed outside of you
but shone brightly in the mirror
of your soul.

Your soul is perfect
boundless
beautiful
a miracle
even though earthbound
slow to see
your earthly eyes might not perceive the brilliance
but will in time come into itself
its Divine Alignment
that axial point of the self
a miracle
but one that must be found alone
one one's own.
If we seek this with the hope of reward of another
for another
with another
we reinforce the same age old pattern of separation
through expectation
which leads to all of Buddha's sufferings....
for love is not to be won
nor is it a commodity
or given to the elite
or elect.
It is the very nature of us
who and what we are.
It is not to be bartered
bought
sold
traded
but given and discovered
as the great truth of You is made manifest
in this one simple moment
as a world of you
rises into this frame
leaps like flame
and bids you come
the gate is narrow
not wide
as we each go to find the miracle that exists inside...

Dust To Dust

Image credit:
Awakened

What you brought
you can take away.

What you breathed into me
can breathed out.

As the universe expands
so does it collapse.
Over and over does this happen
endlessly
or perhaps until something has been satisfied within...

All of this goes in
all of it goes out.

I am not perfect enough for this
I am not refined.
I am full of sorrow

I struggle
I do not excel.

I am not born of grace
but of discordinance.

I am unsure that this has any purpose at all
beyond breathing me in.

if I am breathed in
I can be breathed out.

If I am
I can not be.

So recycle me
take me apart
limb by limb
so that I might dissapear
and be ground into the kind of thing
that is food for the universe.
Move me through the furnace
make me into something
more fitting for you.

There is nothing I can do
only be
and being is not enough.
Let this cup pass before me
I get that we are all one
but I cannot be one with the greater all.
I can only be me
in my little world
pulsing
but not being in the pulse
for its too terrible the truth
of this world.

This is where love dies
where hopes are dashed
even in the face of divine visions of ultimate possibility.
The reality is that its time that we all be ground into dust
starfire for some birthing of the cosmos
a recyclcing of this terrible experiment
which seems to have gone awry.
We are just not ready.

No one truly wishes for the All to Be present in them
but rather their own all to move through them.
This is the problem with individuation.
Everyone is out for themselves.
And that is me too.
And you.
All of you.
We do whats good for us
not for the All.
And maybe
just maybe
the best thing
is that we move beyond this realm
so this world might get some peace.
For our appetites are so huge
so insatiable that we will find no end to Maya
want and wish and hungering.
Never happy enough with the best outcome
we move to the next
and the next.

It will not end.

It will resolve into some terrible result
just as it has for generations.
So let this pass before me
take me
let me be resolved into the great nothing
which is everything
and which has the power to dream itself anew.
Dream me anew
as something different
more fitting for the dust that makes up my cells
and the fire that burns in my soul.

Made
I know I cannot be unmade
but would rather that this might be so
that this terrible world I have walked through
can be less than even a memory
but forgotten
wiped clean.
But this world
is a nightmare.
Are these awakenings stirring in each of us
enough to rouse dust to fire
and fire to transformation?
I saw this before it was even created.
I weep at what has resolved before me.
What was this walk for?
This long terrible turning of the wheel?
What good was it to be gentle and kind in such a world as this?


So Thunderself
come down
step down out of heaven;
I call you
as I call my own self.
Cleanse this world of me
make of me something new
burn all of this desiring out of me
and make of me something different
shining
new.
Let all that has gathered in this cycle
be released
all memory purged
forgot.
Arms raised high
strike me
turn me to smoke
let me rise
like mist into heaven
to rain down upon these fertile lands
made dirty by what we have lain here

Let some good come of this at long last.
Let something good come
let this not be for naught
and let me lay my worry
and heartbreak
that I might slip into some deeper dreaming
where dust swirls off the edge of Orion
and out time forgot
but redeemed
by some greater force
than the ones which seem to have been left in a world such as this.

The Joke

As I stand in this place
I feel the forgotten ages slip between my fingers
like pearls on a silken necklace
like stars in a sky counted before breakfast
before sunrise
as I walk
smiling into the dawn.

But you brought this desiring into me
you who made me
were you seeking to play a joke on me?
Would you give me the world
yet hold it from my lips?
Would you give me knowing
only to keep its reality from my life?

What kind of joke are you trying to play on me?

As the wheel of fortune spins
as a fool moves through his many seasons
the inner self moves forward
and speaks.
I know his voice.
Its not imagined
but known
implicit in the moment.
But why must this all work this way?
What exactly have I done to be so deserving of this?

All of us
suffering on our way to the promised land
just trying to get through this world
swallowing hard
taking all of the gall
just to get to a place where we can dream of honey
but not truly know it
as expressed in this realm.
I am not interested in having heaven slip between my fingers.
I am here to bring heaven to earth.
I was born to walk this realm
countless lives I walked
of not having
alone
even though I was surrounded
by a sea of surging humanity.
And now it is time to bring this to earth
but honestly
there must be something I am missing.
Like some great joke
you have lain all of this before me.
I  wonder over its purpose.

The world
every soul within it
hungers for this love
and yet this love is never enough.
Person by person
awakened
gentled
then brought into the flame
which burns to our marrow.
How can we be
so changed?
How can thou joke in such a way?
You allow yourself to be infinitely divided
yet seek to remain One
and all the while
your children hunger for the only thing they have ever wanted
and this itself
is not enough.
Feed your children.
Feed your progeny.

Such tricks
jokes
played.
Surely I must be missing something.
Surely I missed the punch line.
Sad that it has to be a punch.
Not a gentle prod
or a touch point.
A punch.
Here is mud in your eye!

Sensibility

I have been a searcher all my life.  I can remember this feeling that erupted through me somewhere around the age of 9 or 10.  It began with my searching books about things like divination.  When I read Raymond Moody Jr's first book Life After Death I felt like I had hit upon something very important.  I wasn't looking for magic but the magic that IS us.  Over the years the journey continued and I kept reading some new book by someone who had something happen to them.  All of this left me with a feeling like I had just scratched some deep itch.  There was something MORE.

Over the years it felt as though increasingly more and more was being discovered, this other realm of being that I had hungrily read about through others' experiences, and hen as I grew older, began to brush up against this realm more and more....seeing auras, having past life memories, experiencing energetic effects and how they affected consciousness, my interaction with a deceased grandmother who returned in the early morning hours to enter a dream when I was awake but in the right state to perceive her in her unbounded state of being.....these things and more all began to point to some continuum of experience that I was very interested in....in the same way we were excited in the 60's and early 70's to be going to the moon, and to discover other worlds.  We are, in all truth, adventurous in this way whether we are discovering inner or outer space! 

As I read more, though, I found a rather curious impulse to emerge.  I found I could not read that much about systems of thought very much.  I found a few teachers through books but found by and large, when it came to something that felt like it was system driven, I would stray away.  A light bulb went off when I finally did read some of Krishnamurti's work a few years ago in the wake of my awakening.  He espoused the pathless path, one that did not seek to inject dogma once again into a spiritual journey. After having FELT into awakening for myself I was able to appreciate his words so much more.  I also began to understand, and continue to do so now especially, why I had stayed away.

I never did Kundalini yoga
I never practiced special diets (but I would fast from time to time)
I never meditated based using any system (my meditation was calming down after a long day while in bed)
I did not read and adhere to any eastern traditions of thought about aspects of Awakening.

Understand though, I didn't feel like there was anything at all wrong with these things.  I did not eschew kundalini yoga or any eastern traditions because I thought there was something WRONG with them (or evil or of the devil or any of that nonsense) but because of some deeper sense inside of me that my inner self knew what its "truth" was.   I use quotation marks because truth is itself so changeable and even suspect, subject to peoples perceptions and turns of mind that are themselves built on a worldly foundation that has a lot of distortions. Something inside of me must have known that at some point I would know what I would need to know as I needed it. Looking back I can say that resources came as I needed them in perfect timing and now that I have awakened, this has never been more true. Having said all of this, I did read Gopi Krishna's book and I have browsed through a few things about how meridians work or about chakras.  For the most part, I was very much a tourist.

I have found that now I can go into books and begin reading them and see what they have to say after I was able to FEEL my way through all of this.  It has helped me to gain some insight I think into where we have gone astray, or perhaps better stated that it helps me to understand where I would prefer not to go in this awakened state as a result of what I have encountered.  I also do not get hung up in the language of the traditions (nondualistic shavaism, Advaita, etc.).

An example of this is how energy works.  By seeing and feeling into this and using my own experience and the guidance of a dear friend who has helped me understand some of these principles and how they work, I was able to see that when we connect to others, we also connect into their karma.  Often with energy we can tune a person or change their energy through this deeper connection of our deeper essence. But what people do not realize is that this also means that, through love, we accept their burden and the responsibility in some measure for that person.  The problem is that this means that everything that is connected to that person becomes your own. Energy can manifest illness when it is off kilter, it can cause all manner of things to happen to you if you are not careful.  So as I read recently about a man who gave something to his students called shaktipat, I realized that he was taking on their karma when the writing described how he would often take on their illnesses and suffer through the problems of that student as though they were his own.  This was so because they were part of his own. It was then that I realized just how serious this stuff is. You have to ask yourself if its worth it to take on this other stuff for the sake of bringing one person upwards energetically.  Is it enough to keep them there?  Is this being done out of love or is it being done out of ego? And as far as I am concerned, ego is always there anyway, so the answer is yes (even if just a smidge).  But I suppose then this is about DEGREES.  The difference is that love will seek only to help liberate for more love, not for the person to gain more love but only the satisfaction that they were a vessel for this love, that they did the will of something greater.  But discerning what this is in the midst of an ego trip means little discernment in truth because the ego will hop into the process so fast that you wont even realize its ego.  Don't get me wrong;  I do not view the ego as some devil or evil in us that must be rooted out and destroyed.  I just know that it CANT be destroyed and find all this talk of ego death as laughable, really, because in all truth we don't nor can't do that.  We can ascend into a space or focus our consciousness into a place where it seems we are awash in a cosmic radiance, but we are still here on this earth with everything in place as before.  The real challenge to my mind is learning how to take a bit of that cosmic and breathe it into our lives here now in order to effect that small self that is us here.  Its about growing up.  I am certain that those who only know the bliss of the cosmic have not done the work on themselves necessary for the very fact that I have been able to feel that bliss perfectly yet still come back down to this channel of awareness only to find myself frustrated angry and upset over the most petty things.  I am only human, yes, but I think my challenge is in making myself a better person through real change of the self.

So in reading about this issue of shaktipat and darshan I see that they are in essence the same thing.  One is more "intentional" in which one person is going deep into the other in order to flow kundalini into the other.  In darshan, it is done through a glance, but realize here that with kundalini space is not an issue, so whether at a glance or with your hand on someone's heart, it matters little.  I remember seeing someone doing this (darshan) and I realized what it was she was doing. It was sending out her essence, her soul, her love, into the crowd.  It was called a blessing, but it was also taking on energy by others.  This is experienced just as one might experience these experiences of soul connection which is also like shaktipat.  It is, energetically speaking, the same thing.  In order to send the energy it means a connection is forged.  This then unites the two people even if only for a moment. To release the karma requires an act of grace, a surrender, a letting go.  When I read of a teacher taking on the diseases and maladies of his or her students I know what is at work here.  Its energy.  But we make contracts with it and can be bound in many ways by it, with it.  By knowing this before crossing the road we do not get tangled in that which is part of some false sense of compassion or ego.  By moving forward in a positive way I am better able to forge alliances based on bliss than on what is unresolved in me.  The desire to fix things in others runs strong in the control meme and we have to be careful I think and use love as the measure by which all else is considered. 

So I wonder; is it our job to reach outward and seek to awaken others?  The impulse to press forward to do that can be strong. I know we can tune others' consciousness, but just because we can, does it mean we are here to do that?  Or instead, can we work behind the scenery, through the resonant field of the species to pour our energy into the system by being part of that system and change it from the inside out?  Does the building energy of awakening in one of us press against the walls of the Collective self of the species?  I know it does.  Can we help effect a change based on how the Collective Self wishes?  I think so.  I think that as the pressure builds those who are ready to awaken will do so seemingly spontaneously.   Its hard to know what will awaken others into this new life, but within each of us is the infinite self, the infinite knowing, and while some of us may seem like we are rolling about on the floor unaware we have hands and feet with which to get ourselves up with, we do, and we can (get up).

We are gifted with consciousness which in truth can turn into anything it wants or needs to become fulfilled.  This can mean countless other realities through which we project the energy of consciousness  like a projector that makes the movie of our reality possible.  What we ultimately choose at higher and lower levels of awareness is part of our gift of free will.  In hand with freewill is also individuality. At some place we wed the higher to the lower.  I can't say that I know what will come from that since it has yet to happen fully in our world in an intentional enough way for us to understand it.  This is ultimately the great adventure that is our consciousness and our place in many realities.

I go back and forth on all of this, trying to feel through how it surely should be in its highest.  What I think about is how so many of us have KNOWN what is best for another person, then shoving that view or way of acting or being on another person, and sometimes this has meant entire nations have been effected (here in this country scores of Native Peoples had their lives destroyed by a western conquest that also meant the end of their old world view with the requirement that they adopt the new Christian ideals--people were not allowed to speak their language nor practice their rites....sacred pipes were hidden away lest they be confiscated by priests or police--and their children were deemed in danger from their parents and forced into adoption in order to be raised by Christian parents...all in order to crush and destroy a great and wonderful way of Being here on this earth).  So as I think about this legacy of control and might making right, I reflect on these things and consider what is all of this about?  What is the truth?  The truth, I know, is that we are all infinite beings underneath and thus are working through our own inner stuff in our own way.  To us it might seem people are just not coming 'round but in my higher self I know that time is largely illusory in the sense that its not the final word on how time flows.  Time flows in eddies and currents in swirls but emerges from a larger expanding present and so time loses some of its meaning when we operate in multiple dimensions at once....across vast time scales....and so seen this way, we will each find our ascension at some point and as our own insides bid us.  We can accept help, but trying to push the flow might not always be the best.

By going beyond the old paradigm of control and trying to form and mold a larger spiritual awareness, perhaps we need to approach this in the same way that we have to approach on an individual basis an awakening....which is to surrender.  Maybe as a race we need to learn to surrender when it comes to or larger global awakening.  Maybe not let those who would seek to control to have their run of the place, but to slowly weed this out by simply following what we feel is right to do....and while it seems we are headed for a One World Governing structure, what if the people who are bent on control set this system up only to find that the planet IS ready to unite as one, but just not as they had envisioned?   Maybe that is very pollyanna, but it might also contain more truth than we might think at first glance.

Beyond all the dogma, beyond all belief is the still truth of your soul and this "truth" is love, and your soul is this love.  How do I continue to operate within this stream of love?  How do I honor the larger awakening that is coming to earth?  Let those who have ears to hear......