Within each person is the means to reaching a fuller sense of being, a way towards understanding and experiencing life in a way that frees you from the prison that has been life. I use this term with the understanding that it is we who have made this prison. It has been built by us each choice by choice.
The way out is fairly simple. Understanding how to live a life that is married to the transcendent is, I feel, what we all yearn for within. We want very much to feel connected to something larger. This something larger is your birthright. To get there, a few prerequisites....
At the front of your awareness, normally, is your ego and mind. They are so present that most people aren't even aware of them. Its like that ring on your finger you had there for so long that you forget its even there. What all of this is about is letting down mind and ego, and when you do this the universe comes into view. I have some ideas about how we can go about letting that universe in based on clues in my own awakening. Everyone is different, certainly, and not everything will work for everyone. I never did those things that we are told we must do through other traditions such as the Hindu one which involves mediation and clearing the nadis, part of your energy system. What I did do, which is very telling to me, is I released an old burden emotionally that I had been holding onto for years. As a result of a vision I had at age 18, I was left wondering what it all meant for me now because it dealt with events that I was told would come to pass. I spent years feeling like I was not doing enough to understand it, to honor it in the right way. As a result of this I had a knot of guilt and frustration over the whole thing. For years I merely ignored it, unable to come to any conclusion. Finally, though, I wound up staring at a page about the thunder beings, which this vision was about. There, on the page, this man was giving a speech before a tribal council and he gave his phone number. I had a draft of a letter to another elder that I was going to send hoping to gain some insight on this matter, but something about it bothered me. I couldn't quite pin it. I kept writing it and rewriting it. As I sat there, what would be the fourth and final draft of the letter sat ready to be mailed. For whatever reason I knew I had to call this man. The interesting thing that happened was that not a lot of resolved or explained. This kind man listened to my story and then suggested that perhaps it was time for another vision quest...what I found from speaking to him was that I felt about 80 pounds lighter. I had let go of something that had been occupying my mind in such a way that I was not fully aware of just how much it was weighing me down. Suddenly, somehow, I felt as though I had confessed my sins to some priest (I am not Catholic, but I assume this must be what it is like), and was released from it somehow. I felt so much better. Somewhere, in there, I realized that it was all going to be okay, and I was able to forgive myself.
After that, I began to feel very different. I began to feel as though a presence was calling me, making itself known to me as if it were upon the breeze, somewhere "off over there somewhere" as I felt into this sudden awareness of something more. I felt how I belonged to a realm of being, a family of consciousness. After that, more and more things took place. While I do not meditate in any organized way, I do sink into what is essentially a meditative state. I also did do one meditation which may have helped to spark what I call waveform awareness. I have discussed this a number of times and its what is behind getting the hang of this type of awareness. I contend that its a lot easier to do when you divest yourself of something, or things, that may be weighing on you. These things quite literally drag you down, keep you engaged in ego and mind without your realizing it. We are so used to solving a problem like this when there really is not solving it other than finding a way to just let it go. If its a problem to you, then surely your mind and ego together have sought a way to deal with it. Like me, you will find that you do not solve anything. You let it go. The past is the past. You are no longer in that past. The power that you have resides in the moment. So in this life, be in the moment. This is where you can change things for the better by simply being different. Letting go of those chew bones of the mind, the mind has nothing to do and when you can let the mind go in a quiet and contemplative way and feel into your being....you can become aware of what has always been within you but carefully covered over. Doing this, you effectively release a damming up of your awareness and your energy field. Perhaps you imagine yourself stripping down, imagining that you are removing layers. Perhaps, also, you try Qi Gong, something that has been very helpful for me later on when I became more aware of the blocks in my field. You then can let the universe through. By feeling into yourself you find that place where the universe can be felt. The mind and ego are filters, though, so they have to go, set aside for a bit. They are important for small tasks, but not helpful when trying to conceive of the universe. Lighten your being, breath, and focus on the third eye. Be quiet. Be so quiet and still that there is no other focus but the third eye. If you drift, return. Keep returning and then focus on nothing else. Over time, you will find yourself as if you were dreaming....something is happening. What is happening is that you have moved from particalized egoic awareness to the wave form. its not bad to fall asleep. I often meditate prior to bed so that if I do fall asleep, its a bonus. I can get back to it the next day. The universe is beginning to enter in. If you are ready for an awakening, you may find a host of other symptoms that begin to take place as this energy situates itself within you.
You are a being of many layers. Out front is normally your mind and ego. The ego is most often the part of us that is tasked with deciding what we want. These wants can be shaped by the limited perspective that the ego has, and as a result, can also house wants reflective of our beliefs. Our beliefs are whatever we accept, and within us is a tendency to look to an authority for what it is that is important, or what we think we need. In a family situation, you learn from your parents and family, but you take on belief from others around you, including media. Its understood in sales that we as humans have a built in resistance to anything new until we are bombarded by it enough. I can remember being told that after a given number of "no's" said to a sales person that the average person will eventually cave in and begin saying yes. This is similar to how horses are trained by the horse whisperer. What this man has discovered is that horses have a built-in flight response which is aroud a kilometer. Something curious will happen with a horse after it has satisfied its flight response; it will essentially "give up" and accept whomever is nearest it as its leader and its nature will become suddenly succeptible to whatever direction its given. The horse whisperer uses this as a way for training the horse to take direction form the human "leader." So understanding this principle that plays out in people as well as horses, you can see how succeptible we are on a psychological and biological level to patterning which also includes beliefs.
When you look at how the world is, how media is oriented within it, our beliefs could well be informed by those things which are the antithesis of this transcendent state. This transcendent state is simply your super conscious, your larger self, and this self exists with a higher sense of right and goodness. It is part of a vast system of cooperation, creation, and fulfillment that is beyond most any smaller-scale fulfillment's, which is why when you are situated within the ego mind that when you seek to manifest things in your life that are not for your higher good, they simply will not come to be. These smaller scale fulfillment's are not bad, they are simply the most immediate things that the self seems to want, or believes that it wants. Since its subject to beliefs of what it wants, it can also be formed and shaped. By being exposed to the way media is today, it doesn't take much to see how formed people can be, even on subtle levels. After 9/11, we wound up invading Iraq. All of the prerequisites were there to help solidify public support for such a move, but to this date, there is no evidence linking Iraq to what happened on 9/11. In fact, Wesley Clark states in an interview that he saw plans just days after 9/11 for invading a series of countries which included Libya, Egypt, and Syria. This is just now playing out with our involvement in these other countries for one reason or another. To consider that rebellion could be fomented by those people on the ground, influenced or supported by our own covert agencies in the U.S. is troubling, but shows how these "arguments" are constructed, formed, and to what great lengths a country will go for meddling in another country. Freedom at work. But this is just to illustrate how your beliefs can indeed be shaped out of whole cloth fabrication. By learning to FEEL into the truth, beyond all the mentalizing and egoic struggling, there lies a pulse of love. This is not a love FOR something, the kind of love we most often feel in our particle individualized consciousness, but a love that literally animates all of life and IS life. the very source of life. Its not something you have to do anything for but to simply be. Like a birthright, or a lovely inheritance.
As you awaken more and more, you begin to sense, feel, know, that there is a deeper form of authority within and that you do not need to look for it outside of yourself. This is one reason, not surprisingly, why people who are awakened, reach a place almost universally, where they have to turn off the t.v. and also be careful what music they listen to or what movies they watch because buried within the message is an energetic alignment that is out of whack with what their insides are telling them. I know I am taking a bit of a peripheral view in explaining some of this, but hopefully you can begin to understand in a more tangible way how the mechanics of manipulation can take place. Then, you can become more free by choosing no longer to be afraid or caught in the vise of whatever happens to be going on. You can be a more natural human being, and happier, too.
The presence of this transcendent self is beginning to influence your wants and behavior as its presence is known. When you understand that many of your wants may not be based on your deeper needs but something that is part of a script, you can begin to be more aware of what is happening to you. I am not suggesting that everything you have been told is not true or that its the result of a vast conspiracy, but that most of what is in our world has been so mixed up in distortions that it can be hard to reach the still deeper self. Karma is tied up in this, and karma is most often emotional in nature. Fear of not fitting in, needing to out-Jones the Jones's.....we call this competitiveness, but it also points to a fear of failure, a feeling of needing to prove ones self for fear of not being adequate, or needing others' approval. All of this keeps the ego in motion, engaged in your psyche, and it also can help keep awakening at bay because this awakening happens when you begin to disengage from the falsehood that exists, the distortions in reality, in this level of awareness. The higher self does not need this stuff, it knows that it is perfect because of where it is in the cosmic order. This is so because the higher self is situated within the energy of love and love never seeks to do harm, nor does it seek to work against the larger good. This is what ascetics call disengaging from the world of "illusion." While we may not feel good about ourselves, its because of some misalignment within ourselves in comparison to our higher being.
Once you begin to examine your outer layer stuff, you can begin the work that will help to remove these layers of illusion....getting back to what you what you genuinely need and what will be best for you and your long term goals and happiness. The path is simple and is through feeling. Realize that this self exists outside of time and as a result can make decisions in what seems nanoseconds with an incredible deftness and attention to detail. If there is something up ahead that might make a choice your ego wants to accept but that it cannot see (because it is a very limited part of your being and unable to wrap itself around this timeless dimension), then whatever it is that is not good for you and your higher good, will simply not be. The ego itself does not have the power to intend things so they manifest in your life. Ego will decide based on very immediate surface things. The transcendent sense of self which is plugged into the entirety of the universe has the power and means to manifest nearly anything you need. This is because it IS the energy of the universe. Your self needs to be able to come to a place where it not only knows this, but has beliefs that truly support this notion...less that it needs the power of belief behind it, and more that it needs those beliefs that simply support it. A small but important difference.
In order to get to the core of your power as an unlimited being requires you to move beyond the veils, the layers of yourself to get to this boundless self. In truth the individual self has very limited power until it learns to let go of its idea of individual awareness here in order to begin to soak up this cosmic flow just "beyond" you (seemingly). To do this, though, requires that you leave ego behind. It requires that you surrender your emotional baggage, your karmas, before you can begin to experience samadhi, satori, or bliss. You CAN feel this bliss without surrender, but it will be more as though you have abided by the river side rather than jumping into its curents. Reaching this state is like suddenly finding yourself before a vast ocean of being. At first it seems like this ocean is not you, but once situated within it, you realize it IS you. It is all of us.And it is love. It is all the love you never got, all the love you refused yourself without realizing it. No matter how much you loved another, it could be that it was somehow never enough. that was because something was missing. What was missing was the love of the universe filling you and making a real woman or man of you. This love is orgasmic, it is the deepest form of love affair with the cosmic, and it will reflect back to you everything that you are until you refine and become more like it. Not that YOU are erased. You aren't. Think of this force as being like a parent who is showing you how to be. A father admonishes the child, correcting her, showing her how to be....and over time, she learns the correct habits and attitudes so that they become more like a habit, and then she does not have to work at it so hard. In some ways, this is like this....learning how to grow up in a new way, learning how to become a new kind of person all without ever shedding the beautiful mark of your own individuality and personality. Because this energy is so vast, it has room for you to be whomever you wish, but because of how this love is, this divine pulse, it will show you how to be if you look to it as the one who can model the best that is within you. You do not need a religion for this. You need only let this force in like a lover sneaks in through the back gate and into your chamber. This force will love you perfectly if you turn your attention to it, which means turning from your mind long enough to glimpse this shimmering realm of love. You need only follow it and always ask fo it how you can be a more perfect lover for it....and it will show you.
This is the core energy of the universe, of all things that shape and mold the world we know. This is the intelligence that created dna, that gives shape to molecules, to gravity, and to the cellular structures of simple and complex life forms. This organizing energy is creative and it is constantly forming and reforming in countless worlds. Our world is not merely material that gives rise to life, but rather this energy IS the material world. When you step behind the curtain of your present ego awareness, you dip into this vast ocean and you can literally have an influence upon events. Having said this, this does not mean that you can wreak havoc or bring the world to total peace. It does not work that way. This is a higher intelligence and while its powerful, so is free will. Free will is what can make a very egoic person do things that are not in the interest of the whole. This is what leads to senseless suffering when the planet could be liberated by the sense of cooperativeness and pushing the species and the rest of the planet upwards to a better tomorrow instead of a world where people do terrible things. Its not that some god is silent as much as this spirit is present in ALL things and set up this lab of a planet to learn about being co-creative and in order to do this, we need to understand how our actions can cause real effects in the world.
Creation is itself the very epitome of intention, so in order to learn to be a good creator, you and I must be free to learn the ropes of this type of being. This means that free will must reign supreme. Some would say that this world is not real, and I have to disagree. Nothing created by consciousness is NOT real. A creation gives form to this creative force in all things. In order to create sanely, we need to learn how to handle the reins and responsibility that this act involves. Understanding this one prerequisite will help you to understand how this marvelous intelligence which you can feel within you works. While we may wring our hands and wonder "where is God?" in the midst of bad events, we must understand tha this presence is all around us every moment. It is literally in everything. It animates everything. Its as though our consciousness literally rides upon a wave that is this vast force. The more you can do to become aware of it in your body, the better able you are to understand how it can be utilized to give you a better life.
I am not suggesting that this power be used to help you win the lottery, although if its in your highest for this to happen, there are ways where this could happen. The trick is being clear enough within yourself to know what will in the end really make you happiest and most fulfilled. While most people would say that winning the lottery would make them happiest, I need only think of the many people who, a year after having won, find themselves in a less than ideal situation. Some wind up being "taken" in investment scams, or jealousy in the family or amongst friends takes it toll. Because of the life they led up to that point and the karmas attracting those people to them, they often wind up in bad situations that weren't so good for them. By simply going to the store to buy a ticket and winning, they effected a very physical change in their life, one which their ego told them would be good for them. On the other side of the coin are also people who were happy and fulfilled by their choice to play and then win the lottery. It all depends on where your inner glitches lie. The superself, though, is never wrong, and even if it keeps us from landing that seemingly perfect job or wining the lottery, there are things ahead that will wind up helping to serve our greater purpose in the end. To do this, though, requires a leap of faith. This is hard and its something that causes the ego to want to jump in and try to manage. This happens when there is fear or uncertainty. This is the one emotion that blocks access to the higher self.
Part of an awakening is learning to stay our of fear and stay in the bliss of the boundless awareness that is in everything. This is done also by keeping the ego mind in its place enough for this universal flow to move through you. When you give in to fear, you effectively put a kink in your essence as a vessel for your divine or super self. When you do that, you block yourself from the larger dominion of your being. Learning how to allow this flow to move through you is the next evolutionary wrinkle in your being on this planet. By learning to be in this flow, you learn to move this energy through you and as you do that, you can begin to direct this energy for the good of your own life and for the good of all. Nothing else is as important as that. When you learn to direct this universal flow in your life, you are literally learning how to create at a whole new level. You are a multi-leveled being and by opening in this way you are learning about a part of yourself a vast dominion of your being that straddles physical reality and time. This being exists both in and out of time all at once. This being is capable of communicating a feeling what others feel.
This being can also learn to create in a way that is in harmony with a higher purpose. This higher purpose will always create that which is best. Since you are also a being that is learning, you may have things happen in the midst of this which may seem to be accidents, things out of alignment with peace and harmony. This is because you can begin to feel and direct this universal energy before you have completely divested yourself of those things that stand in the way of being one with this larger sense of self. the biggest impediment is karma....and karma, as I have said, is itself a misalignment, most often emotionally, with the larger or higher purpose or self. It is also a misalignment with reality.
As is often the case, we can have opinions and attitudes about things that are less about how things really are as we feel them to be or believe them to be. If our own insides are not in tune with the universe, then it will feel and wish and hope for things based on this lack of alignment and can bring about creations that do not always work out perfectly. If you remain engaged, willing to learn from these mistakes, you will find the thing that was at odds in the act of creating and will help you to learn to take the guidance of the higher self better in the future. The good thing, though, is that this higher self wont ever be wrong. If you can simply sit back and hand the reins over to this higher self it will guide you. You might not feel like you are in control like you used to be, but then having your ego in control of the universe would be very dangerous indeed. Ego is good for very limited things. It can help you to discern between me and the, a necessary thing for living in a dual universe, but it is only the first layer of experience...a bit like the shimmering light on the surface of the water. Beyond the surface lies something much larger, boundless, and this is the universe which you are a part of in a much larger way than you can imagine.
The way to this state of being is by learning how to move from particle awareness to wave awareness. Particle awareness is your egoic awareness. It is limited, but it is also an important aspect of your experience here.
The other part is the wave form of awareness, and in this state your particle shifts into an alliance with the energy of the universe in building a wave that is limitless in potential. the more is succumbs or surrenders to this state of being, the more aware it is of this larger wave. Out of this wave, you can channel the energy of the universe in creating here on this planet. Out of this you can see and learn things about the mystery of being. It is quite literally at your fingertips because the energy is shimmering and alive. As you are perched upon this wave, you can draw any amount of inspiration from it. You can also simply rest in bliss as some monks have done, happy to simply ride that wave of the All. Learning how to ride this wave and be in this bliss AND operate in the world all at the same time is the practice of mastery. To do this requires that you allow the influence of the bliss to enter into your life and change it.
Anyone can feel this bliss of the All, and they can do this through the layers of karmic entanglement, and you can in a sense be perched in what I call superposition, a term used by quantum physicists, but with all the material you still contain, the effects will be limited. But as you use the energy to help create a better arrangement of your being by doing the work of divesting yourself of those "clods" that serve to block the flow of this energy, you begin to see real change in who you are, how you respond to others, and to your belief system, which begins to change and become more aligned to this larger reality of being.
If your beliefs are limiting, your experience wil likewise be limited also. If, for example, you have an incomplete knowing about good and evil, for example, your perception of this energy might reflect something that is less that focused or resolved. There will invariably be distortions in your mind and body about what all of this is about. By having beliefs that are more in alignment with the ay things are, you will begin to feel and know this higher self in a more complete and clear way. It will also change your behavior and you will begin to mature spiritually.
To get to a new level, learning to listen to this larger self and learn from it, you can effect change in your life. this requires a great deal of faith and surrender. This is not easy to do, but very recently I was willing to listen to this deeper self and it was able to guide me perfectly in the direction that I sorely needed in order to get through a hard period in my life. It feels like we are taking our hands off the wheel, and in many ways we are. Learning to let go is not irresponsible. Learning to let go means you still tend to the day to day things necessary in life. You do not simply remove yourself from life, no, but with the bigger things in your life, you simply allow the bigger part of you to take control and guide the bus.
Now what I am going to tell you is that as a result of this experience, you can learn how to unhook from the grid of control that is part of this world. Instead of simply being in the world but not of it, my sincere feeling is that we are here to learn to create in as high a vibration as we can. We are human and we are imperfect, but we are also learning to hook into and dial into this self which is not entangled in our world as we are. By feeling into this larger self, very often you can simply sense what is not quite right in things of this world and it can serve to help you to steer away from it and to create something different.
When I awakened, I began to feel, in a slightly paranoid way, that there was something seriously amiss with the world. I could just FEEL it.....but since I was only marginally tuned in, I could not quite get what it was. As my awakening came on more strongly, I began to see evidence of how wrong the world was. I realized that there was a lot about our world that simply was not being talked about much, and those who did were labeled loonies. What is so ironic is that now, those conspiracy "nutjobs" are now being called correct in their assessment of what was underway with our world (this has even trickled into mainstream media in regards to world government, for example---and this was reported on Fox even!).
Taking a broader view, I was able to understand how other energies were involved in the game of control in our world. I understood that consciousness, the very nature of it, is made so it can form alliances. We do so in forming the waveform of awareness. We literally merge with the collective awareness to become "one." Likewise, every cell in your body has its own unique awareness, and your own awareness 'rides' on the wave of its being as literally billions of cells live and die in the moment, replacing themselves with the right speed to maintain the wave that is your body and being. This is an example of the built in 'code' that governs the entire universe, most notably life here. This cooperative experience is what we are, it is the essence of us, and unfortunately this can also mean that we can make alliances with forces which are probably not so good for us in the long run.
So to the meat of this....it is now possible, through the power of superposition or cosmic awareness to intend a better world. Things are not so good right now, but we can in our time stop being passive and begin to take a more active role in our gifts to the world. We can mediate each morning and intend that the best world come about for the good of all, wishing or hoping or praying for a better world to come about in these times....a world that is guided more and more by this cosmic principle. And then you can also do more by taking classes that will help you to move energy blocks in your field so the energy will flow more freely. You might try running or exercising. Movement helps a lot! You might save up money and go to a conference or workshop on learning how to work in a higher manner for the good of all. Maybe its a class taught by someone whose at the forefront of global awareness, or you might teach a class on your own of how to bring this awareness into your own body and those of your students. Maybe its a book club that deals with the new world or maybe you write your own book. Maybe its as simple as volunteering to do work in your community in order to support a better local sense of togetherness. By learning to co-create, you use what may seem a passive bliss energy to create out of this bliss instead of the old paradigm of separation. Maybe you write an article for a yoga journal, or an online resource like Nonduality Magazine, or Nonduality America, or any number of other resources out there. Perhaps you volunteer for hospice, or do work through a church or other organization. Who knows what it could be. But by bringing this vibration into the world you create something that shimmers with this energy. By making the energy solid by manifesting it in the world, you literally push more good energy into the world. Maybe you go pick up a handful of gravel and you pray over these little inconsequential pieces of rock and see yourself investing them with all the power of your awakened being, all the love that can flow through you, anchored in that stone, and then go about your day, placing these little stones everywhere you go..
As I sit and write this, it is possible for you to access a font of energy that is not just my energy but that of the entirety of he universe. You can allow yourself in this moment to become inspired, hopeful, and awake about your place on the planet. Free will will always rein, yes, so in this case you can also use your free will to put some of the love into the world, for even the flutter of a butterfly does have some small effect. By bringing in the intention of your boundless self, you bring the power of a universe of such wings into the moment!
For those of you wanting some exercise that might help you reduce your inner junk (as I call it), I suggest that you go back to this page and scroll down to the bottom to find the link near the end. In it, you will be led to a meditation by Osho that I think you can find to be useful in releasing the inner junk that can lead to feeling the bliss of this experience. I say this because in the book I am writing I can see that there was a link between my letting go of some old buried guilt I had been carrying and my feeling a sense of release as well as a sense of needing to make some changes in my life. The spirit was very willing and just a nudge in the right direction set me on a course with an Awakening. I cannot say it will be so for you, but I understand that if you are overburdened with karmic stuff, it might be hard to begin to feel the first strains of this revolutionary energy. Ultimately only your own soul can know if its right for you for this particular time, but if it is right for you then by using intention and asking for the right signs and teachers or helpers or events to come into your life to help burgeon your awakening, then it will happen. In fact, nothing can stop it from happening. It is our birthright....
Nemaste
The way out is fairly simple. Understanding how to live a life that is married to the transcendent is, I feel, what we all yearn for within. We want very much to feel connected to something larger. This something larger is your birthright. To get there, a few prerequisites....
At the front of your awareness, normally, is your ego and mind. They are so present that most people aren't even aware of them. Its like that ring on your finger you had there for so long that you forget its even there. What all of this is about is letting down mind and ego, and when you do this the universe comes into view. I have some ideas about how we can go about letting that universe in based on clues in my own awakening. Everyone is different, certainly, and not everything will work for everyone. I never did those things that we are told we must do through other traditions such as the Hindu one which involves mediation and clearing the nadis, part of your energy system. What I did do, which is very telling to me, is I released an old burden emotionally that I had been holding onto for years. As a result of a vision I had at age 18, I was left wondering what it all meant for me now because it dealt with events that I was told would come to pass. I spent years feeling like I was not doing enough to understand it, to honor it in the right way. As a result of this I had a knot of guilt and frustration over the whole thing. For years I merely ignored it, unable to come to any conclusion. Finally, though, I wound up staring at a page about the thunder beings, which this vision was about. There, on the page, this man was giving a speech before a tribal council and he gave his phone number. I had a draft of a letter to another elder that I was going to send hoping to gain some insight on this matter, but something about it bothered me. I couldn't quite pin it. I kept writing it and rewriting it. As I sat there, what would be the fourth and final draft of the letter sat ready to be mailed. For whatever reason I knew I had to call this man. The interesting thing that happened was that not a lot of resolved or explained. This kind man listened to my story and then suggested that perhaps it was time for another vision quest...what I found from speaking to him was that I felt about 80 pounds lighter. I had let go of something that had been occupying my mind in such a way that I was not fully aware of just how much it was weighing me down. Suddenly, somehow, I felt as though I had confessed my sins to some priest (I am not Catholic, but I assume this must be what it is like), and was released from it somehow. I felt so much better. Somewhere, in there, I realized that it was all going to be okay, and I was able to forgive myself.
After that, I began to feel very different. I began to feel as though a presence was calling me, making itself known to me as if it were upon the breeze, somewhere "off over there somewhere" as I felt into this sudden awareness of something more. I felt how I belonged to a realm of being, a family of consciousness. After that, more and more things took place. While I do not meditate in any organized way, I do sink into what is essentially a meditative state. I also did do one meditation which may have helped to spark what I call waveform awareness. I have discussed this a number of times and its what is behind getting the hang of this type of awareness. I contend that its a lot easier to do when you divest yourself of something, or things, that may be weighing on you. These things quite literally drag you down, keep you engaged in ego and mind without your realizing it. We are so used to solving a problem like this when there really is not solving it other than finding a way to just let it go. If its a problem to you, then surely your mind and ego together have sought a way to deal with it. Like me, you will find that you do not solve anything. You let it go. The past is the past. You are no longer in that past. The power that you have resides in the moment. So in this life, be in the moment. This is where you can change things for the better by simply being different. Letting go of those chew bones of the mind, the mind has nothing to do and when you can let the mind go in a quiet and contemplative way and feel into your being....you can become aware of what has always been within you but carefully covered over. Doing this, you effectively release a damming up of your awareness and your energy field. Perhaps you imagine yourself stripping down, imagining that you are removing layers. Perhaps, also, you try Qi Gong, something that has been very helpful for me later on when I became more aware of the blocks in my field. You then can let the universe through. By feeling into yourself you find that place where the universe can be felt. The mind and ego are filters, though, so they have to go, set aside for a bit. They are important for small tasks, but not helpful when trying to conceive of the universe. Lighten your being, breath, and focus on the third eye. Be quiet. Be so quiet and still that there is no other focus but the third eye. If you drift, return. Keep returning and then focus on nothing else. Over time, you will find yourself as if you were dreaming....something is happening. What is happening is that you have moved from particalized egoic awareness to the wave form. its not bad to fall asleep. I often meditate prior to bed so that if I do fall asleep, its a bonus. I can get back to it the next day. The universe is beginning to enter in. If you are ready for an awakening, you may find a host of other symptoms that begin to take place as this energy situates itself within you.
You are a being of many layers. Out front is normally your mind and ego. The ego is most often the part of us that is tasked with deciding what we want. These wants can be shaped by the limited perspective that the ego has, and as a result, can also house wants reflective of our beliefs. Our beliefs are whatever we accept, and within us is a tendency to look to an authority for what it is that is important, or what we think we need. In a family situation, you learn from your parents and family, but you take on belief from others around you, including media. Its understood in sales that we as humans have a built in resistance to anything new until we are bombarded by it enough. I can remember being told that after a given number of "no's" said to a sales person that the average person will eventually cave in and begin saying yes. This is similar to how horses are trained by the horse whisperer. What this man has discovered is that horses have a built-in flight response which is aroud a kilometer. Something curious will happen with a horse after it has satisfied its flight response; it will essentially "give up" and accept whomever is nearest it as its leader and its nature will become suddenly succeptible to whatever direction its given. The horse whisperer uses this as a way for training the horse to take direction form the human "leader." So understanding this principle that plays out in people as well as horses, you can see how succeptible we are on a psychological and biological level to patterning which also includes beliefs.
When you look at how the world is, how media is oriented within it, our beliefs could well be informed by those things which are the antithesis of this transcendent state. This transcendent state is simply your super conscious, your larger self, and this self exists with a higher sense of right and goodness. It is part of a vast system of cooperation, creation, and fulfillment that is beyond most any smaller-scale fulfillment's, which is why when you are situated within the ego mind that when you seek to manifest things in your life that are not for your higher good, they simply will not come to be. These smaller scale fulfillment's are not bad, they are simply the most immediate things that the self seems to want, or believes that it wants. Since its subject to beliefs of what it wants, it can also be formed and shaped. By being exposed to the way media is today, it doesn't take much to see how formed people can be, even on subtle levels. After 9/11, we wound up invading Iraq. All of the prerequisites were there to help solidify public support for such a move, but to this date, there is no evidence linking Iraq to what happened on 9/11. In fact, Wesley Clark states in an interview that he saw plans just days after 9/11 for invading a series of countries which included Libya, Egypt, and Syria. This is just now playing out with our involvement in these other countries for one reason or another. To consider that rebellion could be fomented by those people on the ground, influenced or supported by our own covert agencies in the U.S. is troubling, but shows how these "arguments" are constructed, formed, and to what great lengths a country will go for meddling in another country. Freedom at work. But this is just to illustrate how your beliefs can indeed be shaped out of whole cloth fabrication. By learning to FEEL into the truth, beyond all the mentalizing and egoic struggling, there lies a pulse of love. This is not a love FOR something, the kind of love we most often feel in our particle individualized consciousness, but a love that literally animates all of life and IS life. the very source of life. Its not something you have to do anything for but to simply be. Like a birthright, or a lovely inheritance.
As you awaken more and more, you begin to sense, feel, know, that there is a deeper form of authority within and that you do not need to look for it outside of yourself. This is one reason, not surprisingly, why people who are awakened, reach a place almost universally, where they have to turn off the t.v. and also be careful what music they listen to or what movies they watch because buried within the message is an energetic alignment that is out of whack with what their insides are telling them. I know I am taking a bit of a peripheral view in explaining some of this, but hopefully you can begin to understand in a more tangible way how the mechanics of manipulation can take place. Then, you can become more free by choosing no longer to be afraid or caught in the vise of whatever happens to be going on. You can be a more natural human being, and happier, too.
The presence of this transcendent self is beginning to influence your wants and behavior as its presence is known. When you understand that many of your wants may not be based on your deeper needs but something that is part of a script, you can begin to be more aware of what is happening to you. I am not suggesting that everything you have been told is not true or that its the result of a vast conspiracy, but that most of what is in our world has been so mixed up in distortions that it can be hard to reach the still deeper self. Karma is tied up in this, and karma is most often emotional in nature. Fear of not fitting in, needing to out-Jones the Jones's.....we call this competitiveness, but it also points to a fear of failure, a feeling of needing to prove ones self for fear of not being adequate, or needing others' approval. All of this keeps the ego in motion, engaged in your psyche, and it also can help keep awakening at bay because this awakening happens when you begin to disengage from the falsehood that exists, the distortions in reality, in this level of awareness. The higher self does not need this stuff, it knows that it is perfect because of where it is in the cosmic order. This is so because the higher self is situated within the energy of love and love never seeks to do harm, nor does it seek to work against the larger good. This is what ascetics call disengaging from the world of "illusion." While we may not feel good about ourselves, its because of some misalignment within ourselves in comparison to our higher being.
Once you begin to examine your outer layer stuff, you can begin the work that will help to remove these layers of illusion....getting back to what you what you genuinely need and what will be best for you and your long term goals and happiness. The path is simple and is through feeling. Realize that this self exists outside of time and as a result can make decisions in what seems nanoseconds with an incredible deftness and attention to detail. If there is something up ahead that might make a choice your ego wants to accept but that it cannot see (because it is a very limited part of your being and unable to wrap itself around this timeless dimension), then whatever it is that is not good for you and your higher good, will simply not be. The ego itself does not have the power to intend things so they manifest in your life. Ego will decide based on very immediate surface things. The transcendent sense of self which is plugged into the entirety of the universe has the power and means to manifest nearly anything you need. This is because it IS the energy of the universe. Your self needs to be able to come to a place where it not only knows this, but has beliefs that truly support this notion...less that it needs the power of belief behind it, and more that it needs those beliefs that simply support it. A small but important difference.
In order to get to the core of your power as an unlimited being requires you to move beyond the veils, the layers of yourself to get to this boundless self. In truth the individual self has very limited power until it learns to let go of its idea of individual awareness here in order to begin to soak up this cosmic flow just "beyond" you (seemingly). To do this, though, requires that you leave ego behind. It requires that you surrender your emotional baggage, your karmas, before you can begin to experience samadhi, satori, or bliss. You CAN feel this bliss without surrender, but it will be more as though you have abided by the river side rather than jumping into its curents. Reaching this state is like suddenly finding yourself before a vast ocean of being. At first it seems like this ocean is not you, but once situated within it, you realize it IS you. It is all of us.And it is love. It is all the love you never got, all the love you refused yourself without realizing it. No matter how much you loved another, it could be that it was somehow never enough. that was because something was missing. What was missing was the love of the universe filling you and making a real woman or man of you. This love is orgasmic, it is the deepest form of love affair with the cosmic, and it will reflect back to you everything that you are until you refine and become more like it. Not that YOU are erased. You aren't. Think of this force as being like a parent who is showing you how to be. A father admonishes the child, correcting her, showing her how to be....and over time, she learns the correct habits and attitudes so that they become more like a habit, and then she does not have to work at it so hard. In some ways, this is like this....learning how to grow up in a new way, learning how to become a new kind of person all without ever shedding the beautiful mark of your own individuality and personality. Because this energy is so vast, it has room for you to be whomever you wish, but because of how this love is, this divine pulse, it will show you how to be if you look to it as the one who can model the best that is within you. You do not need a religion for this. You need only let this force in like a lover sneaks in through the back gate and into your chamber. This force will love you perfectly if you turn your attention to it, which means turning from your mind long enough to glimpse this shimmering realm of love. You need only follow it and always ask fo it how you can be a more perfect lover for it....and it will show you.
This is the core energy of the universe, of all things that shape and mold the world we know. This is the intelligence that created dna, that gives shape to molecules, to gravity, and to the cellular structures of simple and complex life forms. This organizing energy is creative and it is constantly forming and reforming in countless worlds. Our world is not merely material that gives rise to life, but rather this energy IS the material world. When you step behind the curtain of your present ego awareness, you dip into this vast ocean and you can literally have an influence upon events. Having said this, this does not mean that you can wreak havoc or bring the world to total peace. It does not work that way. This is a higher intelligence and while its powerful, so is free will. Free will is what can make a very egoic person do things that are not in the interest of the whole. This is what leads to senseless suffering when the planet could be liberated by the sense of cooperativeness and pushing the species and the rest of the planet upwards to a better tomorrow instead of a world where people do terrible things. Its not that some god is silent as much as this spirit is present in ALL things and set up this lab of a planet to learn about being co-creative and in order to do this, we need to understand how our actions can cause real effects in the world.
Creation is itself the very epitome of intention, so in order to learn to be a good creator, you and I must be free to learn the ropes of this type of being. This means that free will must reign supreme. Some would say that this world is not real, and I have to disagree. Nothing created by consciousness is NOT real. A creation gives form to this creative force in all things. In order to create sanely, we need to learn how to handle the reins and responsibility that this act involves. Understanding this one prerequisite will help you to understand how this marvelous intelligence which you can feel within you works. While we may wring our hands and wonder "where is God?" in the midst of bad events, we must understand tha this presence is all around us every moment. It is literally in everything. It animates everything. Its as though our consciousness literally rides upon a wave that is this vast force. The more you can do to become aware of it in your body, the better able you are to understand how it can be utilized to give you a better life.
I am not suggesting that this power be used to help you win the lottery, although if its in your highest for this to happen, there are ways where this could happen. The trick is being clear enough within yourself to know what will in the end really make you happiest and most fulfilled. While most people would say that winning the lottery would make them happiest, I need only think of the many people who, a year after having won, find themselves in a less than ideal situation. Some wind up being "taken" in investment scams, or jealousy in the family or amongst friends takes it toll. Because of the life they led up to that point and the karmas attracting those people to them, they often wind up in bad situations that weren't so good for them. By simply going to the store to buy a ticket and winning, they effected a very physical change in their life, one which their ego told them would be good for them. On the other side of the coin are also people who were happy and fulfilled by their choice to play and then win the lottery. It all depends on where your inner glitches lie. The superself, though, is never wrong, and even if it keeps us from landing that seemingly perfect job or wining the lottery, there are things ahead that will wind up helping to serve our greater purpose in the end. To do this, though, requires a leap of faith. This is hard and its something that causes the ego to want to jump in and try to manage. This happens when there is fear or uncertainty. This is the one emotion that blocks access to the higher self.
Part of an awakening is learning to stay our of fear and stay in the bliss of the boundless awareness that is in everything. This is done also by keeping the ego mind in its place enough for this universal flow to move through you. When you give in to fear, you effectively put a kink in your essence as a vessel for your divine or super self. When you do that, you block yourself from the larger dominion of your being. Learning how to allow this flow to move through you is the next evolutionary wrinkle in your being on this planet. By learning to be in this flow, you learn to move this energy through you and as you do that, you can begin to direct this energy for the good of your own life and for the good of all. Nothing else is as important as that. When you learn to direct this universal flow in your life, you are literally learning how to create at a whole new level. You are a multi-leveled being and by opening in this way you are learning about a part of yourself a vast dominion of your being that straddles physical reality and time. This being exists both in and out of time all at once. This being is capable of communicating a feeling what others feel.
This being can also learn to create in a way that is in harmony with a higher purpose. This higher purpose will always create that which is best. Since you are also a being that is learning, you may have things happen in the midst of this which may seem to be accidents, things out of alignment with peace and harmony. This is because you can begin to feel and direct this universal energy before you have completely divested yourself of those things that stand in the way of being one with this larger sense of self. the biggest impediment is karma....and karma, as I have said, is itself a misalignment, most often emotionally, with the larger or higher purpose or self. It is also a misalignment with reality.
As is often the case, we can have opinions and attitudes about things that are less about how things really are as we feel them to be or believe them to be. If our own insides are not in tune with the universe, then it will feel and wish and hope for things based on this lack of alignment and can bring about creations that do not always work out perfectly. If you remain engaged, willing to learn from these mistakes, you will find the thing that was at odds in the act of creating and will help you to learn to take the guidance of the higher self better in the future. The good thing, though, is that this higher self wont ever be wrong. If you can simply sit back and hand the reins over to this higher self it will guide you. You might not feel like you are in control like you used to be, but then having your ego in control of the universe would be very dangerous indeed. Ego is good for very limited things. It can help you to discern between me and the, a necessary thing for living in a dual universe, but it is only the first layer of experience...a bit like the shimmering light on the surface of the water. Beyond the surface lies something much larger, boundless, and this is the universe which you are a part of in a much larger way than you can imagine.
The way to this state of being is by learning how to move from particle awareness to wave awareness. Particle awareness is your egoic awareness. It is limited, but it is also an important aspect of your experience here.
The other part is the wave form of awareness, and in this state your particle shifts into an alliance with the energy of the universe in building a wave that is limitless in potential. the more is succumbs or surrenders to this state of being, the more aware it is of this larger wave. Out of this wave, you can channel the energy of the universe in creating here on this planet. Out of this you can see and learn things about the mystery of being. It is quite literally at your fingertips because the energy is shimmering and alive. As you are perched upon this wave, you can draw any amount of inspiration from it. You can also simply rest in bliss as some monks have done, happy to simply ride that wave of the All. Learning how to ride this wave and be in this bliss AND operate in the world all at the same time is the practice of mastery. To do this requires that you allow the influence of the bliss to enter into your life and change it.
Anyone can feel this bliss of the All, and they can do this through the layers of karmic entanglement, and you can in a sense be perched in what I call superposition, a term used by quantum physicists, but with all the material you still contain, the effects will be limited. But as you use the energy to help create a better arrangement of your being by doing the work of divesting yourself of those "clods" that serve to block the flow of this energy, you begin to see real change in who you are, how you respond to others, and to your belief system, which begins to change and become more aligned to this larger reality of being.
If your beliefs are limiting, your experience wil likewise be limited also. If, for example, you have an incomplete knowing about good and evil, for example, your perception of this energy might reflect something that is less that focused or resolved. There will invariably be distortions in your mind and body about what all of this is about. By having beliefs that are more in alignment with the ay things are, you will begin to feel and know this higher self in a more complete and clear way. It will also change your behavior and you will begin to mature spiritually.
To get to a new level, learning to listen to this larger self and learn from it, you can effect change in your life. this requires a great deal of faith and surrender. This is not easy to do, but very recently I was willing to listen to this deeper self and it was able to guide me perfectly in the direction that I sorely needed in order to get through a hard period in my life. It feels like we are taking our hands off the wheel, and in many ways we are. Learning to let go is not irresponsible. Learning to let go means you still tend to the day to day things necessary in life. You do not simply remove yourself from life, no, but with the bigger things in your life, you simply allow the bigger part of you to take control and guide the bus.
Now what I am going to tell you is that as a result of this experience, you can learn how to unhook from the grid of control that is part of this world. Instead of simply being in the world but not of it, my sincere feeling is that we are here to learn to create in as high a vibration as we can. We are human and we are imperfect, but we are also learning to hook into and dial into this self which is not entangled in our world as we are. By feeling into this larger self, very often you can simply sense what is not quite right in things of this world and it can serve to help you to steer away from it and to create something different.
When I awakened, I began to feel, in a slightly paranoid way, that there was something seriously amiss with the world. I could just FEEL it.....but since I was only marginally tuned in, I could not quite get what it was. As my awakening came on more strongly, I began to see evidence of how wrong the world was. I realized that there was a lot about our world that simply was not being talked about much, and those who did were labeled loonies. What is so ironic is that now, those conspiracy "nutjobs" are now being called correct in their assessment of what was underway with our world (this has even trickled into mainstream media in regards to world government, for example---and this was reported on Fox even!).
Taking a broader view, I was able to understand how other energies were involved in the game of control in our world. I understood that consciousness, the very nature of it, is made so it can form alliances. We do so in forming the waveform of awareness. We literally merge with the collective awareness to become "one." Likewise, every cell in your body has its own unique awareness, and your own awareness 'rides' on the wave of its being as literally billions of cells live and die in the moment, replacing themselves with the right speed to maintain the wave that is your body and being. This is an example of the built in 'code' that governs the entire universe, most notably life here. This cooperative experience is what we are, it is the essence of us, and unfortunately this can also mean that we can make alliances with forces which are probably not so good for us in the long run.
So to the meat of this....it is now possible, through the power of superposition or cosmic awareness to intend a better world. Things are not so good right now, but we can in our time stop being passive and begin to take a more active role in our gifts to the world. We can mediate each morning and intend that the best world come about for the good of all, wishing or hoping or praying for a better world to come about in these times....a world that is guided more and more by this cosmic principle. And then you can also do more by taking classes that will help you to move energy blocks in your field so the energy will flow more freely. You might try running or exercising. Movement helps a lot! You might save up money and go to a conference or workshop on learning how to work in a higher manner for the good of all. Maybe its a class taught by someone whose at the forefront of global awareness, or you might teach a class on your own of how to bring this awareness into your own body and those of your students. Maybe its a book club that deals with the new world or maybe you write your own book. Maybe its as simple as volunteering to do work in your community in order to support a better local sense of togetherness. By learning to co-create, you use what may seem a passive bliss energy to create out of this bliss instead of the old paradigm of separation. Maybe you write an article for a yoga journal, or an online resource like Nonduality Magazine, or Nonduality America, or any number of other resources out there. Perhaps you volunteer for hospice, or do work through a church or other organization. Who knows what it could be. But by bringing this vibration into the world you create something that shimmers with this energy. By making the energy solid by manifesting it in the world, you literally push more good energy into the world. Maybe you go pick up a handful of gravel and you pray over these little inconsequential pieces of rock and see yourself investing them with all the power of your awakened being, all the love that can flow through you, anchored in that stone, and then go about your day, placing these little stones everywhere you go..
As I sit and write this, it is possible for you to access a font of energy that is not just my energy but that of the entirety of he universe. You can allow yourself in this moment to become inspired, hopeful, and awake about your place on the planet. Free will will always rein, yes, so in this case you can also use your free will to put some of the love into the world, for even the flutter of a butterfly does have some small effect. By bringing in the intention of your boundless self, you bring the power of a universe of such wings into the moment!
For those of you wanting some exercise that might help you reduce your inner junk (as I call it), I suggest that you go back to this page and scroll down to the bottom to find the link near the end. In it, you will be led to a meditation by Osho that I think you can find to be useful in releasing the inner junk that can lead to feeling the bliss of this experience. I say this because in the book I am writing I can see that there was a link between my letting go of some old buried guilt I had been carrying and my feeling a sense of release as well as a sense of needing to make some changes in my life. The spirit was very willing and just a nudge in the right direction set me on a course with an Awakening. I cannot say it will be so for you, but I understand that if you are overburdened with karmic stuff, it might be hard to begin to feel the first strains of this revolutionary energy. Ultimately only your own soul can know if its right for you for this particular time, but if it is right for you then by using intention and asking for the right signs and teachers or helpers or events to come into your life to help burgeon your awakening, then it will happen. In fact, nothing can stop it from happening. It is our birthright....
Nemaste
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