And The Awakening Continues...

Just five minutes ago I came across this video, and I'd like to share it with you because its so much about what awakening is doing and what makes it so promising, so great.  Quietly, calmly, peacefully, people are waking up to this lovely system we have.....its not in any one country, but spreading worldwide.....and its increasingly about control.  Awakening is the opposite of this.  Its a place of sanity and getting back to what matters most.  When all is said and done, what will you have to say about how your life went down?   Did you participate in the control meme and in so doing, did you limit your experience?  Do you find yourself wishing you could have felt an authentic peace within? No guru, no teacher, no religion needed to find it.....Like the VanMorrison song and a bit like what John Lennon was talking about, too.  The authentic isn't dependent on anything from an outside source, and yet it weds you to everything.

So here is Sarah and Michael Feeley in their own words.  Enjoy!

www3.bestbxcleaner and blogs

This is perhaps a technical issue that concerns traffic to blogs from a site known as bestbxcleaner, and  I am mentioning it here for others who are using blogger as a footprint.

There is a function in blogger that provides  information on traffic to the site. This is all anonymous information to blog administrators and is useful more for knowing where traffic is coming to the site, such as through back links, etc., and acts as a tool for knowing what efforts at generating traffic work and what do not.  Again, this is anonymous information because you don't know WHO it is that is coming from a given site.  No isp information is given, only the sites referring the traffic or where the traffic comes from before coming to your blog site.

Recently there has emerged a page link for traffic that has the address of www3.bestbxcleaner.com that show up in the administrative level Stats panel for blogger.  This is not anything the reader of the blog will ever see, so the links in this case only pertain to the writer/administrator of the blog site when accessing the control panel for web traffic/Stats.  For blog owner and administrators, do NOT  click on the link on the Stats page because it will lead you to a web page that involves active hacking and can install  a trojan horse which will corrupt your computer. This link does not show up anywhere except on your administration pages showing where your traffic is coming from. This is not accessible to anyone reading your blog however since this type of attack is being focused on owners of blogs.

You might, as an admin, be curios to see what this site is all about in order to better understand why so much traffic is coming form that page to yours.  But don't.  Doing so can result in code being placed into your computer that can cause you problems down the road. It is also spam, whose only purpose is to get you as the owner of the blog to click and go to their site.  This is affecting blogs because there does not seem to be a way for Google to stop it.  There IS a way to stop it, but Google has not put anything in place to do that.  In the meantime, stay away from the site www3.bestbxcleaner.

Yes, it drives up your traffic count, but no, its not a good thing.  You may find your traffic fluctuating much more with bestbxcleaner in the mix.
To make bestbxcleaner stop seems to be to not click on their links.  Maybe writing a short article about it on your blog could help too.  Since having this post up I have gone from close to 10 hits a day from www3.bestbxcleaner to zero.

So to repeat;  guests to your blog will not be affected by this bug. Nowhere will there be links that are in any way a problem for your site traffic. This only affects the administrators of blogs since it targets them with links on their Stats page. If you would like more information on this issue, I refer you to a discussion group concerning the blogger and bestbxcleaner issue HERE.  The link opens a new window so you can continue to browse the blog if you would like without being redirected.

Happy Computing!

The Marrow Of Practice

How do I tell you that before awakening all practice only serves you if it leads you to feeling deeply what is already there, that there is absolutely no magic in hand movements, postures, or positions?  Mantras will not do it, meditation will not do it, expecting a result will not do it.  They will not lead you to it.

It is not something that is conferred upon you because it is what you ARE inside.  Its almost as though its something that you know, you just do not know that you know.  Its so close to you that its hanging in your present awareness even though you don't realize what it is.  So this makes it all seem highly mysterious, and perhaps even more confounding for those who seek.

it is not found in silence, for to be silent is to be dead.  There are more who seek the silence without realizing that in that silence something has died.  The silence that  you must seek is one which bustles with life, oozes with it, is the very personification of it. Yes, the mind does become quiet, but it does not become silent. It has a Presence of knowing, of being. It is in love, but it does not say it is in love.  It does not have to. There is an material-less world now humming all through  you, playing through you like a musical instrument, filling you with ecstasy. It is something that you do not achieve.  It is what you are.  It truly is.  Being awake is much more like falling in love than in snapping your fingers, sitting in full lotus, holding your tongue a certain way on the roof of your mouth, your eyes in the right spot, the breathing a certain way.  Once you get it, practice, being meditation or yoga, serve to bring you to the place, but it does not get you there until you are there.  It is not the carriage that picks you up, it is the carriage that carries you once you are on your way.

When I say no practice will get you there, I do need to explain something, and I hope that you can understand that I am not contradicting what I have already just told you.

Will a practice of yoga help you to feel this love?  Can meditation make a lover of you?  Perhaps.  Most likely, though, what happens, is that people approach these things with a goal in mind.  They do not know what the result is, so perhaps they focus on the effects. It calms them, it brings them peace. These are of course all good things, but its not what makes you the lover. I think there is something wrong with a system that has not updated its yoga or meditation in centuries. We say that kundalini yoga will awaken, yet if its so effective, it should be happening regularly using the practice.  This is because the source of awakening is not through a practice. It is more through the imagination than anything else. But when I say this, it seems preposterous.  The imagination is this immaterial thing that gives rise to things that are without solidity, without any realness to them, right?  Here, an important point is missed.  Like how you imagine, like how you fall in love, these things have to do with the very core of what you are.   It is not in a hand posture, it is inside of you.  The posture is an effect, a material form that unless connected to the deeper current, is only a thing. It is like saying you can achieve enlightenment if you do all the same things Buddha did when he reached that place of realization under the boddhi tree.  And no doubt, many go there to sit under a tree planted from the same tree's grandchild that Buddha achieved what he achieved.  But it wont work.  It isn't there.  Its in you.

So it can be said that making up your own practice which serves feeling deeply can be far more effective than any yoga or technique, for it arises out of you, out of your own passion and being. This is just what I have found in my own awakening, that those practices I have created for my own use follow the scent of this beautiful flower that blooms within me, but that is also in everything else, most often hidden, perhaps still just a bud.  What helps me is what makes me more of this thing, which is passion, awareness, awe and wonder.  It is falling for this love in me. Falling for love outside means becoming dependent on the love that dwells in the world, and we are always apt to being dissatisfied with it.  This is not some narcissistic love, it is self love, which is less what you even feel for yourself as what you ARE.  And all practice supports this, or any practice that does what its supposed to do.....which is to serve as a bookmark for this radical feeling, this divine notion, a reminder for what we are.  Practice is not the thing, it is just a facilitator for the thing, only if it gets you there. it helps to inspire the feeling. And it could be that if you get in the habit of always looking into a corner of the room whenever you feel this come over you, just looking into the corner will be the magic....because it helps to remind you where you need to be within yourself, within feeling. But to say that a practice that is supposed to remind you of something you have never felt, like sitting under the boddhi tree like Buddha did, is missing an important ingredient. You lose sight of just what it is by doing this.

The very act of creating structure around this is like trying to grasp the wind.  Once you try, you have not succeeded.  This is not something that you grasp, not something you do.  It is what you ARE.  Once you ARE this, you then realize just how silly trying to ascribe any kind of structure to it is.  It isn't about chakra opening, for if it was, everyone would awaken the moment one sought to open them. It isn't even that breathing does it, even though there is a great deal of material that says it is so.  It isn't.  The only thing breathing does is it slowly you down and calms you.  It returns you to a place where you can perhaps clear a place within the crowd of thoughts constantly swirling around you to come to this one silent truth.  Some people think silence is the key, and yet there are monks and nuns and all the rest who sit silent as stones and are dead, who have fallen a great distance in this silence which is nothing.  But you see, the silence is not nothing.  it is silent, too, but it is a presence of something that resides in everything.  Self realization is not a out a technique, or a method.  It is merely doing just this; realizing what you are deeper down. So for people to present material as though its the truth is missing the point. It would be far better to say "this is what I am doing at this point" and leave it at that. When I read through these writings, they are covered in ego "This is the contribution I have made to this important field of work...." and I have to smile and know its time to move back a little because this is one train that isn't going to go completely into the station. You do not get there through ego.  You do not go there through a materialistic view of how things "work."  This misses the point, and in so doing, confuses and confabulates.  But people love this, it makes them feel like they have something solid upon which to come at this thing.  This is why the truth is so dissatisfying to so many. Ok.  But its how it is, and it cannot be changed.  Your hope, your passion, your love, your imagination have a much more direct line to all of this than any method or process or materialistic methodology about how chakras work, how activating the light body works, or all the rest.  It misses the point.  Its what you ARE.

This is why it is so silly to say that the soul decides which chakras will be dominant.  No, the soul wants fulfillment, and this is not by creating any hierarchy whatsoever.  Its as though one says "I shall have seven children, but two I shall give more favor than the rest."  That is quite silly.  We want each child to thrive, each child to spring from the home to reach its own unique sense of what fulfills them. As a result, one does not want any one of them to be above or below one another. Each child is different, and each will go on to do amazing things, all amazingly different, too!  So to say there is a hierarchy with the chakras is misleading.  It is your karma that decides this.  Karm will create blind spots in your awareness, will limit you.  It will result in the heart being closed down because of some association with an old unresolved hurt, not because the soul wants it to be deemphasized.  No.  The soul wants fulfillment and the chakra system are seven notes on a scale. Without one chakra, a part of the chorus is missing. As you resolve karma, you release the old material that has been attached vibrationally to a given chakra. Simple. Then it can be much more free to open more deeply to the universe. And even so, the chakra can still be felt, even with all the karma, to open.  Its more about awareness of what is still possible beyond current experience that lies ahead of that person.  So as a result of this, awakening can be a bit like peeling an onion.  One layer of karma is gone and the heart opens so blissfully.  Its more than you have ever felt, so it feels like this is IT. And then later, another layer is removed and then this new layer is the ULTIMATE!  On and on this goes until you finally get the memo about just what it is that is happening. It is then at this place of realization that this is a process of reaching an ever greater mystery.  And this mystery does not live outside you.

Getting it right means that distortive material is not circulating.  Lets keep it clear and correct. We lost our understanding of what God is through this very process of misunderstanding back when early Christianity was just getting underway.  Now we have a very distorted view of what the deity is as a triune spirit with a very mysterious ghost whose identity was swept under the rug....so that now, hardly anyone knows what this is.  While its coming back, it only took two thousand years for it to be corrected. An awakening will correct it in a twinkling.  

The New World

There lies ahead a new world.  It has been spoken of by some who were considered mad in their day, some who claimed dream of its reality, its shape, its many noble qualities.  There were other worlds that we were busy with conquering, seeking advantage and fulfillment in them.  Quietly, this world has hid itself waiting for the day when it would be glimpsed enough to make rumor more than rumor, and promise of it a possibility.

This new world awaits each of us, every one of us, as breathless, its secrets are carried on the wind, drawing us all the while, teasing us with its secrets unfolding in the minds of its visionaries.  Dream unfolds to reveal a shining world beckoning. Shall it be conquered? Will humans do what they have always sought to do, to bring nature to its heel under arrogating will as this new world is made a waste as have others, its great possibility but a thin sliver of its greater truth?  Or will we find an entirely new way, a way that was once promised by all the mad men and women who dared speak of it, whispering "it lays there, like a lover beyond all lovers, a land unlike any other..."

Much is said of it, much guessed, and hoped, and spoken of both its shape and nature. Much has been suggested, and guessed at.   Here, a gathering throng now begins to see its shores as it begins to emerge out of the mists of  dream.  We gather ships whose sails are filled by hope and travel to this place together, which is our collective yearning, building something that if we allow ourselves to set aside what we think we know for allowing ourselves to dream more broadly, to see something that is beyond all that we could have imagined. What seems its physical shores always seems to remain shrouded in mist, and yet even as our own dream builds its presence within us and it never quite appears, we are most certain that it lives in us not merely as just a dream.  But what kind of world is such a place?


Upon its shores, which live within each of its adventurers, we find a new world where things happen differently.  Instead of material land  moved by human hand, these lands are moved by mere intent, properly placed. The skies blue and bright by day turns indigo and brilliant, bespeckled by the fires of countless suns who we now know are the  brilliant souls of our ancestry living within and without our world. The stars resolve into who we are in some other form, and here we tell tales of looking back into the past but with a new twist. We are they looking down into us as we all look from within, with minor shifts in the cosmic time frame. Here, in this world, every particle bears the knowing of every other.  We speak and our words are heard not through air but through channels neatly laid within spirit as all of this world awakens, as air knows our words as intimately as our own beloved.  All secrets then pass beyond us and into a greater knowing, like lost souls redeemed in the great sea of time.

The greatest dreams in this world become evident not in conquest but through surrender. Here, there is no nobility that must be toppled or laid to waste, but known as a far greater mystery than any lineage that had its place upon this earth.  A lost land with our lost parentage who were royal, their line consisting of every human who ever lived, a world now passing out of loss and into gain.  Only in this world could we ever hope to journey and find them awaiting us, to crown us all princes and princesses.  The only law which binds this royal line is the love that awaits within as all veils of the old world gives way to the new.  Here, no banners born from dogma fly, just the deepest and truest knowing which rests in every heart and in every mind.

As we take up residence in this new world, may we always dream broadly as its great secret emerges in larger dimension than we could have ever believed. Instead of a known and conquered space, may we greet it always with its mystery upon our lips and its grace moving through our hearts as it brings us the courage, love, and awe to dream it anew in each and every moment.  This new world is just ahead my friends.  Its as real as any new world could ever be, perhaps more real than any could hope to be.  For as much as we have scanned the horizons for its place in our universe, a world full of searching will never yield it unless we peer intently and deeply within ourselves. 

Popping The Lid Off Duality

Okay, so when you go through this awakening experience you become very aware of how your bliss is the result of a merging of two opposites inside of you.  I was aware of it as a refined intelligence that had suddenly started moving through me.  It had a sense of awareness about itself, but it felt so diffuse or so developed that the "I" was not there in the way it is with a person.  It was certainly there, no doubt, but this "being" for want of a better term was more like one of us far far far into the future when we evolve into earth spirits, sky spirits, guardians of vaster realms of energetic experience.  Not to say this IS what kundalini is, but very much HOW it felt which is perhaps to say that this is a higher order awareness, what I say in my book our future selves looping back into us, a cosmic hand up from out divine or cosmic parents.

You can feel their union in you from the moment this begins to move.  Some say kundalini must go UP the spine to be fully realized.  I say its fully realized the MOMENT you feel it.  Then, it sweeps you clean.  And then, yes, you learn how to flow into ever greater levels of INTEGRATION of that energy which is there in UNION from the get-go.  Realize, what I am saying is that the two forces of the divine masculine and feminine are not working their way UP to reach a place of union.....they ARE in union.  THIS is what creates the unique experience of kundalini.  And it is we, on an individual level, who learn how to effectively mimic this, or learn it from this cosmic parentage.  Its how ALL learning works in our world, so I use the analogy because its so close to how things work with awakening.

So, knowing this, we sense there are two poles in us that push and pull.  Really? We certainly experience that.  I say the poles are a seeming in a larger world of reality.  Here, though, through the magic of individuation, we tend to move from one end of the pole to another. We do this based on our own natures at the soul level.  Its a choice, basically. For some reason one soul feels more aligned with the inverted force of the feminine whereas another soul will feel more aligned with the extroverted energy of the masculine.  We then see the sexes, the natural kingdom dealing in all of this dual expression and we say, its a manifestation of something deeper.  But what if in truth, what kundalini is trying to tell us is that all of the sexual energy we feel, all of the yearning we feel is merely the result of being pulled from one end of the polarity spectrum?  And what do you think would cause this tension?

In awakening, when you feel ANY form of tension, what can you attribute it to? The literature is rife with this phenomenon of energetic tension, and its spoken about as leading to intense pain in the body only to find there is NOTHING in the body to warrant it.  Its entirely energetic.  What do you think causes this?  I say that the cause of this is our own misalignment from the deeper truth....and this misalignment is karma. If you consider that all karma is a miperception of what is true, you will realize that it is karma that gets in the ay of your being able to FLOW and integrate kundalini. This is all done in degrees and is not a sudden thing, but is more like a spiral than a destination. If you were to see it visually, you'd see a spiral going on forever.  There IS no end.  We just keep going, developing, opening, realizing our greater potential along this growing world of awareness.  We all accept I think that as you drop karma you free yourself up to FEEL more deeply into what this kundalini thing is. And what it is is simple; bliss.  THis bliss is a new level of being based on joy and wonder than the old modes of pain and loss. Its a flip.  WHat has been keeping your from experiencing bliss is karma. You THINK you are separate.  You THINK you aren't loved.  You THINK you will be abandoned.  Now just to make things interesting, in comes the Law of Attraction.  Remember, its entirely neutral, but once it hits you (well it doesn't suddenly hit you....its ALWAYS there....) but once it "hits you" you naturally find events form themselves around your expectations.  So in the case of a hard karma about loss, well the world will bring you loss.  You become a prisoner to your own junk.  Now that's hard. But kundalini is there, a kind of ace in the hole and it whispers "You have a choice....you have free will.....you can choose to feel differently......the path is forgiveness.....only this will free you.....you can't pretend your way out of feeling differently.....you must BE different....."

So karma is the material that separates us from our nonduality.  Its like mortar between two bricks that really don't want to be separate but ONE.  It LOOKS like the two bricks are separate through the wonders of the physical world of seeming, but in truth, the bricks came from the same seam of clay, were all made of the exact same stuff.  Deeper down, the bricks know they are part of something that makes up a whole.  Dissolving the karma results in settling in deeper to the Source of all life and to the bliss that pours through it. This bliss leads to a very different life, and I daresay its far preferable than living a life of loss, anger, sadness or fear.

So we tend to divide out from one pole to another because of how bodies have evolved to process this energy on a physical level.  We create more people through the process of our being individual and sexed differently.  We have all made this choice to do this.  We identify with a certain composition of sexual traits.  This isn't merely male or female, but also can result in a range of effects where people have a blend of traits, too, as in the case of gay or lesbian. Based on my own experience, though, I can say that there is  a polarity to this energy much like a magnet having two poles and attracting based on its opposites.

I have never read this having happened to anyone before, but some time ago I had an experience that involved what I can only describe as a momentary flip of my energetic poles.  This happened as a result of feeling into my makeup energetically.  While I do feel we tend to move into one end of the sexual energetic spiritually, I also note that we ourselves are a mixture of traits that we would identify as being masculine or feminine.  As a result of this, one layer is a MIX of traits. On another layer, we are polarized towards one end of the spectrum of yin and yang.  I would say for simplicities sake that the former tends to define your sexual orientation.  Again, I think its entirely possible to have variations inbetween where the identification between one or the other is less polar.  I don't think its a hard and fast rule, just that there SEEMS to be a tendency towards one end of the poles over another per soul choice.

In this experience I became aware that I was a woman living in a country that very much looked like Mongolia. I lived in a kind of hut or tent.  It was covered with the hides of animals.  We wore heavy clothes because it was cold most of the time.  As I felt into this through the eyes of kundalini, I felt something happen where my own sensing into my sexual energy experienced a sudden flip in my body.  There, in my life as a male, I could feel my energy change.  It was as though it turned itself inside out. Instead of a beam of energy projected outward, I was a shaft of darkness pulling inward.  I did not push energy OUT I pulled energy IN. What I experienced, though, was a bliss that was identical to what I had felt as a male. The only difference was HOW I felt it. Perhaps how it was processed, or HOW energy moved through me was different, but the feeling was about the same.  Looking out through her eyes, I could feel how fond she was of her partner.  He had rough callused hands from the work he did. He was kind of rough in a way, yet he was simple and direct.  He was uncomplicated.  His eyes were like a beam of energy that exuded a quiet sense of confidence.  I cherished him.  And feeling this, it was a revelation.  As a male in this life, I found that I did not feel weirded out in the least by this.  IN fact, I was overcome by the sense of love and intensity that existed between these two people.  I felt the same attraction I might have felt otherwise except the energy went IN instead of OUT.  As I felt this memory fade, I felt my alignment continued along the feminine pole.  I then observed that the pull began to weaken and I could feel the polarity literally shift inside of me, like a bubble rising to the surface of the water.  What happened through all of this, though, was an amazing amount of energy was liberated.  For days I felt the waves from this experience.  I think that under most circumstances because of our own fear, we never experience this just because we are somehow afraid it will alter us, make us strange.  We are, after all, some of the most repressed beings sexually of any species on the planet. Centuries of weird societal and religious controls that I think are entirely unnatural and repressive have kept us from seeing or knowing our truer selves.  It isn't that we are some kind of strange androgynous beings, no.  But even so, WHO says being androgynous is weird?  Weird to who? Snails are able to fertilize themselves.  Nature certainly makes a case for this way of being, so how is it weird.  Maybe its just outside of people's experience.

So here is the thing.....Jesus spoke about how he was one with the father and mother.  This is in both king James and in lesser known gnostic texts, so we know its not some glitch.  Mother was changed or used interchangeably with Holy Ghost. Most forgot conveniently what the Ghost part was all about.  But regardless, her was Jesus with the father and mother IN him.  He was ONE with them.  He was as much in the father AS the mother. And he was a dude, okay?  Buddha himself experienced kundalini, and here the masculine AND feminine were crawling all through him.  Yup.  The DUDE was experiencing the bliss of the WOMAN coming into (gasp!) union with her male counterpart.  Her is where I light my hair on fire and pretend to run around the room in mock terror. So her is the thing; I can FEEL what it feels for the feminine.  Being unchained through kundalini I KNOW what its like. Being connected through soul energy and soul connection, I KNOW how it feels. Its part of a deeper energetic merging that happens when two consciousnesses come together in this way.  If you go deep enough you can feel a sense of being in two bodies at once.  THIS is what consciousness does. It is not limited.  When I had a a past life experience of a native American vision, I was in multiple places ALL at the SAME time. None of this felt strange or even confusing.  If felt natural.  Only to our limited individual awareness do we dream such limited dreams that tell us we only experience life through one perspective.  Hog wash!  Energy flows. Consciousness flows.  Tantra, one of the highest forms of worship involves this very form of energetic communion between two people.  There is a sense of two becoming one less in body as in soul. How is this possible?  Divisions are dissolved enough to allow it to happen.  You are no longer weird about what it might feel like to feel another person feeling you feeling them. Feeling you. And them.  And back again. And this DOES happen.  Its not some weird glitch of the universe or the product of some depraved mind. When you get there, though, all of your old junk just drops as you see in a larger totality how the creation is perfect.  And in an awakening, you have BOTH of these polarities in you.  BOTH.

We have both in us.  We were said to be born from their union.  So if souls are made in this way, we are each a part of one and the other along with a choice for a given polarity so that we wind up one orientation or another. Curious, I think, because I sense that the amount or reliance on one end of the polarity depends also on how many lifetimes you have lived as male and female.  I do not buy that we are exclusively one or the other.  Nope. I can se and read in all people a blend of traits.  Some women who are very feminine also have some pretty overt masculine traits, and what is most interesting is how they themselves choose not to see them.  Something about the polarity of being convinced of just how feminine they are seems to breed this.  Women, though who are more of a blend where they do not define themselves so strongly along gender lines also have less of a problem with being one or the other. There are also all sorts of variations in between. And the same goes for men.  Some men are amazingly weird about any suggestion that they might have feminine traits. These men, are extremely polarized while also having a kind of repressed femininity.  Some men are very comfortable in being sensitive and nurturing. See, thing is, our worth is not tied to one gender or another.  We can be whatever we want. Quite naturally we have some people who will scream from the sidelines that we ought to be burned at the stake, but really, who is paying any attention to those folks anymore?  Do we? So the point here is we may have a polarity within our sexual orientation, but we will also have a blend.  We have both.  And I suspect that we need both because life force IS both. You just can't get around it. This I very much suspect is the case.  If you tease the masculine out from the feminine embrace in the universe, things would devolve into madness quickly.  If you do the same in the opposite fashion, the universe would go crazy in the opposite direction, but mad nonetheless.

So we feel all of this in separation.  Our bodies are separate, our awareness is too, or so we experience until awakening hits.  Gradually, we learn things aren't QUITE the way we had thought they were. And why?  Karma. As we dissolve karma, we bring those poles closer and closer.  Do we lose our sexual identities?  Well let me ask you, do you think individuality can ever be destroyed?  I don't think so, no.  I think that any imprint made will remain even if for some reason someone WERE to manage to slink back into absolute oneness.  Others would naturally follow, so its not a genie you can keep in the bottle I don't think.  I think the further we get from concretions of thought, the more flexible we are to see the universe in all its vastness.  Do I think that means you HAVE to be sexually flexible?  No. I still think we have the capacity within to still grasp it.  Now as to whether we embody it, that might be a different story.  But ultimately, the walls do come down at one point or another, and its at that point where there is no fear over what those walls even mean because they are now no longer useful in serving karma. But still we have choice because we have free will and because of these things, we do this out of individuality.  Some say its an illusion, but I say its a CREATION.  and THAT dear reader is a BIG difference!

So honor the masculine and feminine within.  They bring you bliss.  Its okay, the universe is making love inside you, big deal.....your parents obviously made love in order to make you, so surely some good must come from this love thing.  And a curious thing happens when you can ride the wave of this bliss, all those karmic issues that seemed so pressing aren't so pressing anymore....yet another interesting inverse correlation with karma and kundalini.  Kundalini: The Karma Killer!!!! (now THAT would be a GREAT Baliwood movie...a kind of double headed cobra meets dark mysterious overlord in Godzilla-esque scales as they fight it out over Tokyo or Varanasi).
Of course, anyone who DARES speak of things in such light ways certainly CANT be enlightened, so why listen to me?

Indeed.  Why.

IN the end, through all this, no matter where this all goes, it all ends in love. Its a trip you take that always leads to the same place.  I am sorry.  You are in the city of love.  You wake up, make the journey a different way and there you are; the city of love.  There is no escaping it. City of Love.  And while I am at it, that too would be a great movie title, but without the scale miniatures of city buildings.  This one would be the greatest of romances.

So flip or not flip.  We are all one.  But you do have both inside you.  Remember that.  You can't spell love without BOTH. Well, actually you don't spell love B-O-T-H but I bet in some world you do.... 

A Good Purpose

I just listened to an interview with someone who had gone through awakening....and is so often the case, well sometimes the case....often....this person was holding a good deal of hurt in her. She wasn't aware that it was coming from within, and thus in doing so, projected it outward.  There was a fight to be had, a power to topple, a wrong to be made right.  She was a tangle and it made my stomach tense up.  I understand.  I was down that road once.  I was once gripped in this KNOWING that there was something going on that was going to bring this world to its knees.  It was the old order of chaos and control.  Its been around a long time, and yet, we have all helped to build it, maintain it, and keep it in control.  Otherwise, it would not be.

Beneath all of this was an awareness of the archetypes....and I have written about these before.  In the beginning they can come whispering in the night.  Insights, healing, great moments of reflection and change in a flash.  What these are we can sometimes become befuddled by in a sense.  We think they are real.....and they are......but seeing the bigger picture helps.  And I presume to know.....so just my two cents worth.

All of creation is a giant fractal like form.  Its holographic, and it repeats.  It does this out of a very simple basis for how reality is formed, how all of creation is formed.  Out of two forces that do indeed exist.....and these two forms exist IN us and they are mirrored all throughout creation.  In atoms that can be "twinned" to reveal a weird quantum effect where one particle responds in the same way even when both are at great distances.  Recent experiments with photons has shown that this effect can be done over many miles and may well extend out into infinity. We know in soul connections the same thing happens.  People are joined through vast distances and can feel one another.  We also know that experiments made recently with a man and some skin cells kept in a petri dish so they would remain alive registered all of his ups and downs consistently while he spent time vacationing in Europe thousands of miles away.  These things that defy reason or logic merely point to this principle at work, which is that the whole universe is touching or connected to itself through an endless number of points.  Better, there is a unifying force that is in ALL things that is the same.  Sliced a trillion bazillion times, its like the loaf of bread I dreamed of once where no matter how many slices you took off of it, the Presence of the deity was in each one, completely undivided, completely uninterupted.  No matter how thin you slice that loaf, there it was.  Its in EVERYTHING and as such, by reaching into it within ourselves, we touch the infinite.

We ARE individual.  We came here to experience this.  We divided out and came on this adventure in consciousness. And along the way we fell into karma and this little knot grew in us.  And now, in this age, we are undoing the knots and letting them fall like some overly tight corset.  And as we do, we realize just how beautiful we are underneath all of that covering.  All of that delusion that we are somehow separate.

So here's the deal my quantum mechanics all over the planet; what we are here to do, given we want the mission, is to begin feeling into what we really are deeper down.  We are individual, yes.  We have all kinds of knots and troubles with the world.  Its out to get us, most certainly, because that is what we created.  But like children at play, who think they see the world the way it IS, we get caught up in all these passion plays and then along come our parents, our higher selves, and they say "what's the fuss all about?"  And as children do, we say Johnnie hit Lucy and then Tabitha fell in the mud and then Brad laughed and she started to cry and.......the parent says "you guys.....you just need to relax and enjoy the time you have and stop being mean to each other.....now everyone forgive each other and go play nice, okay?"  And in real life what this means is you feel the pulse of awakening in you and in that moment you are transported beyond all your silly and petty arguments.  Suddenly all that matters is being still and knowing that there is a deity inside of you.  This is a secret that many do not want you to believe or know.  Its okay.  But you reach God and the Goddess from inside of you, and when you do, you feel incredible bliss.  This is where people described things like "being made love to by God" and things like that.  Its because its true. Its just that there is no other concept that can describe this level of intimate contact with a higher form of consciousness, so we feel it as the most exquisite bliss.  Buddha felt it.  The early Christian mystics felt it.  St Teresa of Avilla likened it to being married to Jesus and God.  She could not wait to die so she could meet them on even ground. She actually said this.  So you can begin to get an idea of just what this is like.

So what is the purpose of this?  The purpose is simple. Its to grow love here.  See how your experience has brought you so much bounty.  You feel this bliss, and in reaching this place you know its a huge milestone.  You are feeling the deity inside....the universe that is loving you.....and indeed it is the most lovely thing.  it will mirror you perfectly because its so vast anything you conjure it can mirror and more. Endless worlds and civilizations have felt this.  All of life vibrates with its presence.  We are waking up to this just now....and the purpose of it is to calm us, to heal us.  We merely need to be channels for it.  We become like Christ's, like Buddhas.  Its no more complicated as that.  Just FEEL it.  This is a huge thing!  Now let it do its work.  Sink into it, and then feel how your highest can touch and become a channel for the universal flow.  Imagine it flowing through you.  You are bringing heaven to earth. You, one of the most blessed beings are doing the great work, the divine work.  Still feel like things are a little cramped?  Feel deeper into this love.  Let yourself flow. Allow yourself to not know all the answers and seek always to be led by it.  Seek the highest.  Do your best. Follow your conscience.  We are all like children, and sometimes we will misunderstand and not be able to see he bigger picture.  But the purpose is to consider that the archetypes do reside in us in that we share something in common with them.  They are like our ancestors.  They reside in other scales of awareness and yet we are all connected. Stop asking questions. Let yourself be still. Just FEEL it.  It is bigger than you and It will work its magic on the planet.  Trust it.  It has to go a certain way.  Participate, yes, co-create, yes.  Learn from what you create.  Take lessons from it, and keep moving forward.  Sometimes, the best way is the silent way.  Feel it do its work FOR you. Its been lifetimes of separation and its now being knitted back together.  We just need to give it some time to work.  I promise, this is what is happening.  Its this retrovirus being placed through the backdoor and it will infest everyone with this peace and this divine love.  Some of it we might not understand....and yet, it will be able to stand up to your questions and your queries, so do not wonder if testing it is somehow dishonoring.  It isn't.  Do what you must.  It will be there once you are done.  This is about letting go in order to realize that all the stuff we held wasnt necessary.  What was necessary was so simple it lives in the hearts of children....and like children, we all need a little direction from above.  This time, though, we aren't getting direction from some ancient book or some old teacher.  We are getting it direct from the source.  So embody it to the best of your ability.  Do your best.  And love as much as you can.

There is no more fights.  This isn't about that.  Find your truth.  Go beyond delusion.  Meet your own love within one on one. It is there and its waiting. And once we have filled this planet with love, perhaps the divine will have other plans.  Until then, we must lay the ground work for the divine to inhabit the earth.  Up until now, its only done so in pockets and sparks.  Be the channel.  That is all that needs doing.  Be the best channel you can be.  Speak up for love.  Be love. See how transformative it is for YOU. 

The Human Aura

Its been the subject of religious iconography in the East and West, and its been the subject of growing interest over the decades as our experience and understanding have grown in the present day.  Saints have been depicted as having glowing orbs of light surrounding them, and stories tell of illuminated beings who come in visions. The idea of our being as composed of a light has endured and has taken a turn in the subject of the human aura.  While it would seem that only the most saintly would have these glowing orbs of light surrounding them, the truth is, we are all beings of light, of energy.  Seeing the aura is one aspect, one facet, of a world of energy that is the tip of a larger realm of awareness of ourselves as more than mere physical matter.

There are methods explaining how to see the aura, and all of these will work, for the ability to sense into this world is what we are.  However, understanding what its all about goes a bit deeper and can be a little confusing at first until you understand what is indeed going on.

Your own energy body is itself like an antenna of and for energy.  We draw this in to us as part of what we are.  Some would like to think we are pulling from some larger grid of energy as this cosmic energy and life force floods into our chakras.  While this may seem to be the case, I would like to suggest that there is boundless energy available to you now, and that while you seem perfectly solid and singular in your awareness here and now, there are larger parts of you that are right now moving vast amounts of energy as part of its very essence. I will tell you that all energy is aware, conscious.  I cannot speak for electricity or all the rest except to say that I know that my own consciousness rides atop a swirling world of physical organs and cells that all depend on electricity to convey information to all of its many parts.  We know the body produces a weak electromagnetic field much like the earth produces, and this comes about as a result of electricity being present.  Electricity creates these magnetic fields, so I must surmise that al energy has consciousness of some kind.  My own experience in awakening shows that my own consciousness and its encounter with higher forms of energy does create greater awareness, and that all spiritual practice serves to help the person in moving larger and larger amounts of this energy to fuel awareness.  Little surprise, then, that in a kundalini awakening that one feels or experiences greater levels of awareness.  Its a pretty simple concept, then, and is one that has been born out in my own experience over many years of having different encounters with larger chunks of energy flowing through me.

But what is this energy?  To seek to analyze it down to its most basic of quanta or particle does no good to my mind. Doing this only takes apart the thing that needs to be understood in its totality rather than parts.  This is not to say that some information cannot be gleaned by taking things apart, but it will probably never get you to the place you need to be which is IN the experience rather than merely reflecting on it.  So what I am saying to you is that instead of trying to figure out what it is, sit back and FEEL.  What you feel in your physical body is a manifestation of this energy.  What you feel in your emotional, mental, and spiritual dimensions of your experience is ALSO "it."  I say this because this energy does not come in discrete pieces, but is best known as a wave form.  Taking the wave apart to see all its particles only breaks the wave.  To know the wave, you encourage its place within you, its presence.  As it grows, you will observe that it changes how you see things, what you experience, and how the world seems. Rather than pieces, consider levels of this energy as greater and greater waves.  While the aura seems itself to be seen by the eye, the truth is, you are sensing it with your own body of energy. YOU are the antenna, and the better you are at tuning into that field of energy, the better you are at picking up on it in a conscious way.  And yet, the concept of seeing the aura persists.

Seeing the aura is a trick the brain performs when presented with information that it has no sense for receiving it. For the brain, there is a set number of circuits available to it.  Eyes, ears, nose, tongue, and touch are the five most recognized.  Within this finite system of the brain, there is also a great deal of flexibility for how information is interpreted.  Every psychologist who knows much about physiological psychology has agreed that if the brain is presented with material that is not gleaned from the five senses, it will find a place to put it. Its a massive filing cabinet of everything felt and known in your life.  Marvelous piece of machinery, yes, and it also has the ability to move right along with quantum effects....to think outside the box.  This, afterall, has been the element that has allowed us to survive without claws, strong arms or legs, furry bodies or big sharp teeth.  If anything, we are the antithesis of what the top predators of the world have possessed that allowed them to survive and to thrive physically. This tells me that the experiment with the human biological "machine" isn't about the usual method for survival and development. Within us lies the innate capacity to think beyond what our brains seem capable of dealing with. Limited, for sure, but within that lies a very flexible system that allows for a range of things that we may have not thought possible.  Its equally possible, then, that there are bodies of energy within us that are carriers of intelligence that operate independantly from the brain.  Consider that your energy body is intelligent and thinks.  Consider that because it is made up of energy and that this energy is intelligent, that there is a means for processing information in a way that strikes the brain and is registered within it, but that a lot goes on in the same way that a subtle energy brain might operate.  We are coming to the realization that not all thinking is being done in the brain, that there appears to be evidence for the heart muscle sending far more information from it to the brain than what comes from the brain, for example.  We also know that past memory can be lodged in the energy body and in the physical body.  Consider that body work has for centuries sought to release old traumas and problems through the use of movement and manipulation of the body tissue.  Chi Gung was a method I used to dissolve many old blocks in my energy field.  Massage therapy often results in people crying on the therapists table after an intense period of working on certain parts of the body.  Ida Rolf, known for her incredibly aggressive massage therapy called "Rolfing" developed the method based on a sense that people register old traumas and hurts in the physical body and that these could be accessed through her method of digging down into the tissues. Acupuncture also opens up areas of the energy body in a way that can lead to clearing of our energy body. The action of kundalini itself has the universal effect of churning the depths in an attempt to stir up and remove old patterns, old hurts, old unresolved issues that have served to hold a person back spiritually.

When people say "don't shove it down" when mentioning emotional material, what they are talking about is the very act of suppressing this emotional material.  It seems far better to face whatever it is head on so fears do not develop that wind up submerging the experience down into the subconscious.  By pushing it away, we push our energy out of awareness.  We limit ourselves by fragmenting the self and our own energy bodies. By being more whole, we drag those old dead bodies out of sight and out of mind, recognize them, and let them go.  In so doing, we also achieve a more unified and more healed state of being. We are less cluttered, less effected by those old issues that have been shoved down and out of awareness.

Now there is a method in all this bit or ramble, which is to point out to you the way energy works, that its not just the brain that is doing all of this.  Certainly, I would say that the brain does record the information and this energetic information impinging on it does have its effects.  My guess would be that it has subtle effects on the brain that allow it to be rewired to a certain degree, perhaps to a large degree, so that as more and more awareness grows in what seems to be our subconscious (perhaps this is just our energy body?), the brain learns how to keep all information about all its seemingly different parts not locked up in tidy little boxes where we can conveniently filter out and forget old material, but instead brings everything into a greater unity so that we can become more efficient processors of information from both the physical and subtle realms of energy.  It is my experience that the energy body does quite well on its own of picking up on information without the need of any physical sense to process it.  I don't think there is a need to have a physical sense for information that impinges on the world of the physical but may have no mass, which is what allows it to behave quite differently than most physical phenomenon.  Mass seems to be the issue.  Mass is physical, but when you remove mass, you are dealing with a range of effects that are pretty wild and exotic.  Here you move at light speed.  Here, your energy could literally globe trot across the earth as some people who have had out of body experiences report being able to do. This is how someone on one side of the globe can feel what another is feeling as it is happening in that seemingly inexplicable moment of psychic awareness.  It is experiences such as these that people manage to experience through an arrangement of their awareness that brings them out of so-called conscious awareness to deeper levels of awareness that have been mapped by sensitive instruments enough to show us that there is something happening in the brain in regards to the type of activity its presenting and the information that it is processing.  It appears that in all the studies with yogis and people with a good command over their mental states that they can bring on a deep state of awareness that leads to feeling very differently and is also a region in experience that brings on visions, insight, and what some might call second sight or psi ability. This is the realm of remote viewing, intuition, mind reading, out of body experiences and all the rest.  To get there one shifts away from the conscious into something else.  It is this something else that I contend is the realm of our energy awareness. This is like the other brain, the other intelligence that we have that is rooted more in feeling than in rational thought. We tend to discount it because our focus has been for so long on the rational....which is the desire to pick phenomenon apart.  But for all the creatures we have picked apart in our search for understanding, we have learned the how but never the WHY. It is the WHY that I am pointing to and it cannot be reached through simple rational thinking.  To get there you have to give yourself over to feeling.  You have to give yourself over to that self, your body of energy which is a part of your sensing.  Its a part of what you are.  You ARE this energy.  So understanding this, lets take the next step....

Most often, learning to see the aura involves holding your hands up in front of you and gazing at them in a particular fashion. What are you seeing? Well, you are not looking for anything.  This is counter-intuitive, but in this method is a clue to how this all works.  You are holding your attention on your hands, but you are not using your usual means of seeing as you are used to doing.  This is to say that you are not focusing on any one part.  Again, this is harder to do than at first blush.  Consider that what what you need to do is to scan or use your peripheral vision more than your center vision.  Its almost as though you are tuning out the center of your own vision in favor of a different way of seeing.  Again, another clue.  But as you do this, you are merely waiting for something to resolve in front of you.  And what is this? With your hands in front of you, with your palms toward you and your fingers slightly outstretched, bring your hands together so a finger tip or two touch.  Then very slowly, draw your hands away.  As you do this, it might help to focus beyond your hands some so that your focus is not directly ON them.  This might work well for you to look a few feet away.  It might work well if you look just an inch away from your fingers.  it may also depend on how far your hands are away from you.  The further your hands are away from you, the easier it may be to scan more.  The closer they are, the more easier it will be not to scan, and by looking further away you may lose some of the seeing that you will need.  The idea here is to play around with it.  I tend to feel holding your hands further from you, close to arms length may work best, but everyone is different.

I would suggest that as you do this that you pick a room where there is good diffuse lighting.  Instead of having sunlight streaming in on a southern exposure of the house, choose a room that has a northern exposure.  This will give you naturally diffuse lighting.  Also, you may want to try this in a room that has lightly colored walls with no competing patterns or objects on them such as art work or other objects.  For as much as I dislike florescent lighting, I have found that for some reason, this type of lighting has helped me in seeing the aura better.  It may be the diffuse light it produces, but it may also be its rather irritating flicker that plays a part.

Another thing that you should do is if you wear glasses, remove them.  Even if your eyesight is very poor, do this, as the reason why will become clearer in a little bit as I attempt to bring this full circle for you.

What you will be looking for is a very subtle effect, a difference in the air as your hands move together and apart. You may see some image after effects which are the natural result of the cones in your eyes becoming fatigued by looking at the same object for a time.  This effect can produce some things that can look very much like an aura, and I want to point this out to you now so you can realize the difference.  I am sure you are aware that when you look at an image for a few moments that upon shifting your eyes to a blank light colored wall, you have been able to see a colored after image.  This is not what you are looking for, but while you are doing this exercise you will likely be seeing this a lot, so it will naturally compete for your awareness some. The reason why I am telling you to move your hands together and apart is because your own energy will tend to grab hold of itself and then pull away as your hands reach a certain distance.  I wont tell you precisely what you will see as I prefer that you simply not have any expectation about what it is that you wind up seeing.

Now I am going to tell you a little story about how I first came to see auras, and it is a tale that helps, I hope, to explain what happens when we shift into energy awareness.  Before I do that, let me emphasize that  most of all disciplines that have to do with reaching higher states have to do with letting the yammering side of your conscious self to drift into the background.  How we do this is the result of countless methods and techniques, but all of them have all the same purpose or outcome, which is quieting the mind. By doing this, we seem to keep the mental activity that naturally competes for our focus or awareness so that this more seemingly subtle part of our awareness is edged out of our experience. Being able to get calm helps.  Breathing helps since it naturally has a calming effect, but there are other methods, and one of them I discovered when I was 18 and attending college.

Before I tell you this story, let me explain that before this, I knew what the aura was.  I had done a little reading on it.  Being who I was, I was very curious about all of this phenomenon.  It wasn't that I was skeptical, I very much was open minded and had a very hearty sense of excitement about the prospect that these things existed.  For me, it was part of a very exciting realm of what I felt was partially hidden from our view.  Being so naturally curious, I considered that this realm of tuned out reality was there just under the surface.  I wasn't exactly someone for whom having this experience was a huge surprise.  In fact, it was my own awareness of auras that helped me to test the phenomenon from the first hour of having seen them.  I will also say that the summer before I went off to college I met someone who could see auras.  I thought that this was the coolest thing.  He talked a little about it and what he saw, and I picked up a little about it from him, although he tended not to speak about it terrible specific terms.  I picked up on how he would look slightly beyond me when he read my aura.  I picked up on how he would take off his glasses in order to see them more clearly, for example. In fact, I even had a dream a month before I started seeing auras in which my friend was in front of me and was reading my aura. In the dream he then said he was going to show me his aura and for me to watch closely.  As I did, in the dusky light of the waning day, I watched as I saw his energy emerge into view.  I was astonished.  Now, it was a dream, and while I have always viewed dreams as capable of containing all sorts of material from psychic phenomenon to simply sifting through feelings, I thought the dream was curious but on the day I started to see them I did not have the dream in mind at all.

On the day that I began to see the aura, I was in my dorm, coming from another class and having to pick up a notebook, which was making me late.  I realized I only had minutes to get clear across the campus before my next class started.  I had to go into a sprint as I sped across campus past the theater, the library, and the clock tower that was beginning to toll the hour as I tried with all my might to make it to class on time.  The professor who taught this class had made it clear that anyone who was late to class should not even bother coming in, so I naturally was doing my best to get there on time.

What was happening at the time was I was working to keep oxygen to my body.  I felt faint.  I was chugging away, my legs feeling like lead weights as I bounded up the stairs to the second story where the classroom was.  My focus was entirely in my body and in getting it to that class on time.  Everything else was crowded out.  There were no small thoughts eating at me.  No nagging thoughts of what I was going to do tomorrow or the paper I would need to write.  I lost myself in the moment.  I was in the Be Here Now-ness that we are all now familiar with by now. Was I feeling spiritual?  Are you kidding?  Did I feel mystical?  Nope. I was firmly focused with getting air to my lungs as my whole body seemed entirely focused on oxygenating itself and getting to my class on time. By doing this, I edged out a whole range of things that might have been normally a part of my awareness and which would soak up my focus.  I had become very simple and quiet.  As I took my seat, I began to focus on the lecture being presented. This was being given in the art building, a grand international style building with lots of glass windows all facing the north.  Studios always have northern light because it produces the fewest harsh shadows and allows you to see more clearly what is there.  The room was open and spacious.  We all sat in a circle with the professor in the center giving his lecture.

I first noticed that I began seeing a vivid field of energy colored blue around my professor's body that had the most unusual habit of moving seconds before his physical body did.  In each case, his physical body would move into the exact place this field of energy did.  I could see what looked like a ghost of his face turn to his right seconds before he would do so. I would see his arm in its subtle form reach out to point only to be followed by his placing his arm in the same exact place. As I watched this, I considered that what I was seeing was the aura.  The dream I had had clicked through my awareness and I wondered....was it somehow connected?  Was I on the verge of being ready?  Was life just waiting for the correct set of circumstances to hand me this sensing when the time was right?  As all of this happened, I began to scan the room and noticed that one of the guys who lived in my dorm was sitting off to the side and had the most peculiar energy surrounding him.  His field was not blue, but was yellow with a tinge of orange in it. Coming off his shoulders were these two foot long spires of orange energy that I intuitively read as being pain.  I noticed that there were subtle differences in his field of energy.  Some areas were brighter, some were more intensely colored, and some would go to almost white.  By this time, class was coming to an end and I decided to test what I had seen in my dorm mate.  I walked up to him and clasped my hand on his shoulder in a happy welcoming way in the same way an old friend might give you a friendly slap on the back.  If I was wrong and was just seeing things, he might have no reaction, but if I was seeing something I ought to expect some kind of reaction if what I sensed was right.  He immediately winced and cried out saying that his shoulders were sore.  As I pulled back in mock surprise, apologizing for being so rough with him, he explained he had been lifting weights the night before and had overdone it.  What I observed was that there was nothing about his body language that would have suggested that he was in any kind of pain.  He was this beefy kind of guy who always liked to lift weights so he tended to move around less like a gazelle and more like a bull, so if anything his body language was mute in regards to feeling.

So my head was spinning with the possibilities for what this could all mean!  In an odd turn of events, I found that my ability to see auras as I had that first time entirely went away after the incident.  I had returned to a less simple state of mind.  All of the old postures of consciousness returned and the seeing was edged out.  Since none of this appealed to the rational mind, even using the rational mind was itself a dead end in trying to understand it. It was here that a new world opened up to me a few days after this happening occurred. I had a fellow classmate who also saw auras and I discussed this with her in the snack bar.  As we sat there, another classmate came up, a slightly older student who was in the art department.  He said to me about my professor "He is a very ordered guy, so you see this in his energy all the time.  You can see his aura move before he does...."  Suddenly I was surrounded by several people all talking about this energy.  It was then that I realized that all of this was around me but was very hush hush because of how different it all was.  Seeing energy?  Sound crazy to most folks, right?  It was probably the very thing that would get a person branded a witch  back in the day, so understandably people were tight lipped about it.

The sight began to come back over the course of the next few weeks as I relearned the type of focus required for this type of seeing.  I was very curious about all of this and was always using my lectures in class to watch the professors to see what I could see.  I found that I was looking in the same way that my old friend from home had, finding that I could see best by looking just past the person.  It felt as if my peripheral vision was better at picking this all up than my frontal vision.

Over the next few months, I began to learn what all the colors meant.  I found that while there were charts explaining what the colors were supposed to mean, my own experience was at variance with these. I only had one book that discussed the aura at any length, and since this was before the internet was anything being talked about, my only resource was that one small book.  I found that I could learn best by taking in what I knew through observation to be true.  What I did was to take situations where I was very clear on how the person was feeling and then tuning in to them to observe the colors that came into view.  If I saw someone who would shift from one emotion to another very quickly, this was a great opportunity for me to learn what this all translated to in their aura.  Over time I developed a kind of visual vocabulary that worked for me.  I also found that there were some colors I just never saw that were mentioned in this one book I had.  For example, I have never seen red.  I suspect the book explained that red was anger and passion.  For me, though, I just never saw that color.  I also found that the aura is a very complex matrix of energy that has both emotional, mental, spiritual and physical conditions imprinted upon it.  In the very beginning I used my friend's own seeing as a way to gauge what it was I was seeing to figure out if I had any glitches in what I might be perceiving.  As time rolled along, I found a way to trust what it was I was seeing or picking up on.

Now, I am going to tell you something that has to do with bringing this whole thing full circle.  The truth is that we do not in fact SEE the aura.  We can't see into that wavelength of energy with our eyes.  This is in truth what happens when we shift our awareness from physical sensing to energy sensing. The brain is getting this information and because we tend to be very visual (I was studying art so....), it is no surprise then to find the brain putting all this information into the visual centers.  It does this in a very appropriate way, though, effectively creating a visual analog of what is there.  And yet, in a way, it is not there as we seem to see it.  The reason why I told you to take off your glasses if you do wear them is because your glasses keep you too focused on your frontal vision which I suspect has a way of also keeping your mind focused.  When we enter into these dreamy mystical states, our vision changes....we scan and focus less on any given thing.  I suspect that this mirrors that is happening in consciousness.  We are literally tuning out one focus as we bring another into full conscious awareness.

Some people will see the aura without any colors associated.  Some will see color.  Some will see a very broad field of color that goes further and further outward.  Some wont.  Some will see people and objects in the aura while other will not.  For a very long time I only saw color effects but began to see objects that the person was talking about moments before they would mention them.  I began to see a dim form of a movie playing all around the person as I could see what they wee thinking in their mind's eye.  Its all how one focuses.  It may be that someone who sees only white auras and no color is FEELING the color part while seeing the outward movements of the energy.  I suspect this is so.  It may also be that for some people, their perception is somehow blocked by their own mind.

But wait.....why would I tell you to select a room with diffuse lighting with light colored walls and all the rest?  My sense is that this has less to do with seeing as it does with sensing.  Diffuse light will lessen dramatic and distracting visual effects.  It will keep contrast low and will keep your frontal vision from latching onto such things as a beam of light striking the side of someone's head, which invites frontal vision effects.  Here, you are entering into a slightly more muted environment and in this way all of these conditions can aid you in "seeing" better.  Having said all of that, you CAN see auras in darkened rooms and even against noisy backgrounds.  It helps though in identifying what it is you first pick up on because of how subtle it can all be and the tender balance that seems necessary in reaching the point where you begin to see the aura. But realize, too, that more than seeing we FEEL them.  And why? you guessed it; you ARE this energy.  And this energy is naturally aware.  You are stepping into that quantum world where everything IS energy.

Now I will say that you are not at the mercy of anyone's energy.  You also are best served by being neutral in your perception of all of this.  The more neutral you are, the less you drag the ego into all of this.  By doing this, you naturally remain without any agenda.  By using this perceptual ability with an agenda, you are misusing energy. You are effectively becoming a wizard, and wizards like to dress themselves up in their abilities for the world to see because they themselves do not have enough self love in them to understand that they are absolutely perfect as they are.  The more we dress ourselves up in this spiritual jewelry for personal gain, the more we miss the point.  You don't need to tell the world how incredible you are through something as simple as seeing the aura.  Everyone can do this.  Its what we are.  And besides, everyone IS incredibly wonderful and amazing once you clear away the debris enough to see everyone at their soul level.  So what you see can often be all of that material playing through countless people.....all rising to the surface of the aura.  What I prefer to do is to go back to that childlike sense of wonder, excitement, and awe that all of this is even possible.....and in so doing, realize that seeing the aura is but the tail of a much larger thing.

As a result of all of this, it is possible that some wont ever see an aura.  That is okay, actually, because deeper down, we are all feeling them with the seeing of them as being a neat trick the brain plays to present it to us in a different way.  I wont say that one way is better than another, only that each method has its benefits as well as challenges.  Seeing auras keeps you relatively neutral, which can be good, but it can also shield you from how what you are seeing actually feels. It can lean into the analytical a bit, and the only problem here is that all of this seems to work best when you can bring all of you to the experience.  Its when we start dividing things out that we only see one small aspect. This is where we begin dissecting phenomenon all without seeing the bigger picture.  Its just one way to examine, but in the end you have to take all of your microscopes and x-ray machines and come to an inner understanding of all the phenomenon that you have seen.

I think that seeing the aura could be very helpful to people who do body work who want to remain very neutral in their work.  Sometimes it can be hard to feel deeply without getting caught up in the field of feeling from another person.  Its a trick I think that the greatest healers have gotten figured out through years of practical work. I simply have not had much experience with this type of work, but I suspect that in some cases using  aura sight could help to quickly identify some issues and then be bale to go to those issues more quickly.  A psychotherapist could use the sight to identify exactly what it is s/he is seeing in a patient, how it expresses not just in their mental and emotional state but the physical one as well.  This could be done with a glance.  But still, the person thus seeing has to know how to relate to what it is they are seeing.  In this case, being able to feel could also be said to be a more direct route. All of this is very empathic, but empathy with an ability to sense what is being felt without being swept up by it.  This seems to me to be an even more focused and practiced balance along the wave of awareness, and again, I suspect this all comes from years of work and familiarity with what works.

When I think about this process of staying healthy within ones self in regards to this sea of energy, I am reminded of a book I read many years ago about a medicine man who was a healer by the name of Rolling Thunder. Rolling Thunder did a type of healing that involved both energy medicine as well as healing with herbs.  His approach to healing was that most disease took place within ones own self, within feeling and the emotions.  Sometimes there were problems that were more directly physical, and it was here that the account of his healing was described.  In the book Rolling Thunder the author Doug Boyd describes how Rolling Thunder performed an impromptu healing ceremony on a man who was listening to one of his talks.  Rolling Thunder took note of the man who had injured his leg in an accident before coming, but because he did not want to miss the talk, he came bad leg and all.  Rolling Thunder approached the man to see about his condition, asking him about it and if he was alright.   People clustered around to see the wound on the man's leg.  It had grown dark and was filling with puss.  This was a large wound on his leg that was clearly getting worse by the minute.  Rolling Thunder asked the man if he would like to be healed.  He explained that this was something only he could give permission for and to understand that once he gave permission, it was going to happen and he WOULD be healed.  When the man agreed, Rolling Thunder asked him to think of all the things that this healing would do for him.  Did he want to be free from the pain? Would he want to have his health back?  Would he like to be able to take part in physical activities that he could not in his present state?  Rolling Thunder said for the man to focus on these things as he began the healing ceremony.

Rolling Thunder then asked for a pail of water and for a piece of fresh meat to be placed in the basin and placed near the man.  Rolling Thunder began by breathing in this unusual way according to Boyd.  It struck him how he seemed to be snorting like an animal.  He went into a trance state, breathing heavily and doing this type of deep nose breathing that seemed very animalistic.  Rolling Thunder used an eagle feather as though he was flicking away an invisible object from around the man's leg and body, flicking the energy into the pail of water with the meat.  Rolling Thunder then seemed to go even deeper into his trance state and began moving around the man, grabbing his leg and then beginning to suck violently on his leg until he moved backwards and vomited violently into the pail where the water and meat rested.  Quite suddenly Rolling Thunder had returned to his normal self and was looking calmly around the room as he picked up the pail and  explained to one of his assistants that the pail had to be taken far from the building and the contents buried, being careful not to spill any of it along the way.
Within minutes the redness in the man's leg had already begun to disappear.  Within an hour, the man was up on his feet and playing a game of ping pong in the meeting house where the talk had been held earlier. The results were dramatic and was one example of how this man was able to remove the sickness that was keeping the man under the weather.

This is a method of healing done by aboriginal peoples that is known as "sucking medicine" and in it there is a ritualize drawing away of the bad energy that is the result of the injury.  The shaman then draws this energy away from the person  into themselves only to remove it from their own bodies through a process of vomiting or purging that gets the energy out of the body.  Without this, the sucking doctor could become sick from the same energy that caused the injury in the first place. This may also involve a broad range of effects for the person, a kind of ritualized or symbolic taking away of the energy surrounding the accident so that the person doesn't have it with them anymore.  In this long winded way, I think that this healing helps to remind me how we need to have mechanisms to keep ourselves healthy.  In the tradition of the sucking doctors, they do this through purging, a way of removing the energy effects or perhaps even the karma from their own field through a technique that works for them. But this is a technique that is based in energy.  Its a drama played out to help one to feel differently, to let go of trauma, and to even have some physical event to focus the mind and intent of the patient.  In a way, its a bit like seeing auras.  In truth, deeper down, its all about energy.  Seeing is an effect that appears in the physical in much the same way that the healing done by the doctor does.  it can have very real physical effects because that is how energy is.  Our bodies quite naturally are effected by whatever energy it comes into contact with. Finding a way to cope in a healthy way with what one comes into contact with is the key I think.  So perhaps for some simply visualizing having helpers in the etheric realms beside you helping you maintain the highest degree of awareness and protection does the work necessary.  For another person, the method might be still different.  I can remember Rolling Thunder explaining to Boyd how different healers have their own style or technique and are careful not to copy each other.  This is less a rigid scientific protocol as it is a full range experience.  It is science and poetry, life and wonder all rolled up into one.  And there may be more things there than meet the eye, too.

I think back on the early morning visitation I had with a celestial being, an angel, who told me his name and then unceremoniously reached into my heart chakra and pulled something out of my body that felt like an old body. This same account was also found in a book written over a thousand years ago by a Carmelite nun in Spain by the name of Saint Teresa who had a nearly identical procedure worked on her by an angel with an arrow tipped in golden fire.  The being explained that I would be more beautiful without this there.  I detail this account in the book I have been writing entitled Waking The Infinite.  The effect was so similar to drawing away things from our field of energy that the two stand as closely related to my mind, and helps to be a kind of touchstone bridging the world of the physical and the spirit.  In each case, both Teresa and myself felt a bliss so complete, so beyond words while this was happening, that for myself, it put me on a new trajectory in my experience.

Its all energy.  Learning to handle it in a healthy way I think is a very positive thing for you.  While a lot of what I have described may not appeal to some people who only want the techniques for seeing the aura, I think that what you will find is that you will naturally limit yourself by going this route. By taking in all that I have said, you will realize that in seeing, you are dipping into a world that is much larger than you might have realized, but is a fascinating world of us as light beings, energy beings experiencing life in this physical form.  If you can come to it with the simplicity and curiosity of a child, the experience will naturally unfold as it should. I tend to feel that we all will know when we are ready.  Perhaps I was being made ready when I had that dream the month before seeing auras.  Some might say it was wishful thinking.  But whatever it was, whether connected or not, the result has been sensing auras in this way for over 24 years. And I hope that in this rather long winded post that I have provided you with some information that will pique your interest, maybe remind you of something you may have forgotten.  It might also strike you that seeing energy just isn't your natural focus, and this is all as it should be.  

Brain Waves

In the map of brain wave activity below you can see that so-called higher brain activity is marked by a higher frequency whereas mystical states of insight are marked by a very slow vibratory frequency of brain wave patterns. I don't feel that one is preferred over the other necessarily, as it seems to me that we need variety....mystical states followed by rapid brain activity perhaps as a way to learn how to integrate the experience into our larger lives. Its an interesting chart.  I hope it helps....

Wipe Out The Noise

When we move from infinite awareness---what I call Waveform Awareness to the finite,or Particalized Awareness---that soap bubble of you that tells you that you are YOU and discreet and singular, you enter the focus of the world of phenomenon in a way that leads most often leads to an illusion of separation. In this separation there is pain and hurt and worry and all negative emotion that serves one thing and one thing only: separation. More. The more we feel this one-sidedness, which some call a misidentification of the self with itself, instead of its more natural and healthier birthright as infinite and connected (with that soap bubble you call you as floating WITHIN this infnity of bliss), something in us dies or goes dormant. We are left with a corpse that is our lives, and we are left with the limited realm of our separateness, our singularity that tells us that we are alone.....and this is the noise instead of the signal. I don't think we were meant to live that way, to be that way (even though we have thousands of years of this very type of feeling in our memory banks individually and collectively) We live a half life as the noise overwhelms the signal, as we move out into the particle and away from the wave.......and the wave is our connection to ALL That Is. We were made to receive the signal from the very center of all life, to receive it so that its mere presence would do the magic that IS what it is. It heals us of everything we thought we were or were not. We see as things are, not based in the egoistic attachment to expectation. Here, this is where all karma turns and is born in us, so its quite natural to expect problems with this self. The "work" in this individual self is in forgiveness of ourselves so that we may shed all the competing memes and programs that have held us hostage and kept us from smiling and feeling blissful and ecstatic in the moment. In this crazy place, its easier to just feel BAD. How on earth is that any way to be? And yet, ego does this for us. Ego is not bad, its just that it quite naturally does this number on us because it identifies with the most immediate phenomenon here on the planet, and it only sees what it WANTS to see. Because of this, it can be surrounded by love and just never see it. I have seen this behavior first hand in myself and in those whom I love. I have a child who is utterly convinced that his notion of how unloved he is is true. As a result he heaps wheel barrow loads of loathing into the phenomenon in an effort to justify why he feels the way he does, never realizing that all of this is emerging out of him. We deny our place in all of this I think because we can't believe that we could be so messed up. But a curious thing happens when you face all of this in an honest way. You grapple with it, you return to the inevitability that returning into the wave of love does. It forgives. It surrenders. It says to the universe "Take me; all of me, I am yours." And here, in letting go, the universe grabs hold of you and nothing can ever be the same.


We are each multiversal. I serve the divine masculine, the voice of the infinite. I know that deeper down I touch upon a universal aspect. This is the basis for the old pagan rites of bringing the gods and goddesses down to earth. They would inhabit us. In truth, we reach a portal within us where we mesh with the larger nervous system of the universe. It isn't that we are taken over by some being or entity but that we are all ONE and thus like body that shares all the same water from the lips, the same electrical signals, each cell shares in the collective experience of that body. We are a cell in a larger body, waking up to learning how to embrace this reality as our beauty and not feeling as though its any kind of threat. My touch is bliss for I bear the light of its knowing. It moves through me. I am not the bliss, the bliss is itself. I do not presume to be it, but I am a reminder that it exists. To myself, to others who are ready to see it. Just as Jesus said "through me" this is the same. We each serve as reminders for others of what we are deeper down. We each choose to lapse into forgetting, into the ego, into the sleep of illusion. Learning how to anchor this bliss on the planet can be the hardest thing because expectations born of karma crush this bliss. We feel we do not get what we deserved, or what we wished for, or hoped for. Instead of allowing the light of the infinite to shine unconditionally, we slip into the night of the woeful self, the victim, the lost child, the spurned love, the forgotten one. We fall for our belief that we may not be lovable or good enough. We lash out in anger, in fear, in our loneliness......


When all along, we were never alone. Its secret lay curled up inside of us, waiting patiently for the moment when we made ourselves ready for it, allowing ourselves to be seduced and taken by it.


This is what the voice says. You have never been alone. I break all illusions, and place you in the stream of your own bliss as the reward unto itself. Only when you come to it in this way will you know the zero point. At the zero point a new world resolves away from what was in the past. Its not magic. It is life claiming itself. A larger part of you goes for the bliss instead of the pain. You move away from the focus on what you thought went down and began to believe that you may have been looking through very colored glasses. We can't tell just how colored our seeing is until we just quite the identification with those glasses. The only thing that works is getting into the bliss, into the flow that is this zero point...which is where the wave of the infinite crashes upon our individual shores, letting in a great and delicious mystery. "Take me; all of me, I am yours" your lips ennunciate as you sit alone looking out the window. As you do, you feel it slip all around you like the most ancient of loves, the most perfect of loves. When you heal in this way, when you say yes to this love, you are on your way. This is a huge step. An important one.


So when you are ready to sift through the noise to find the signal, it will come through amazingly clear and persistent. The bliss is YOU. Before the All, you ask it to take you, all of you. You have given yourself to the ultimate as it pours through you moment by moment. You become multiversal. You are one with the deity, a force so vast as to be nearly incomprehensible....but lying in its body, like a cell, its nerve impulses reach you as you wake up to the realization that you were never really alone, but waking up to a bigger life, a larger life full of sound and beyond the noise.