Friday, June 8, 2012

The Truth Of The Divine Source

I have been dealing with the issue of inner truth throughout my awakening.  This began to emerge when things got more difficult for me, back when the energy broadened and put ego on the defensive, shall we say.  Ego had been running the show, holding everything tightly together in all that it knew to do.  I didn't realize just how much of a controlling agent it had become in holding all of my many parts together in a way it thought was best to do.  The unfortunate thing, though, is that it was also holding together all of these old karmas together which were not good for me.  When the whole thing began falling apart, ego was more free to drop back into the background, realizing it was wrestling with the cosmic gorilla.....a powerful and unbending force of perfect divine alignment.  Ego had no other choice but to slip back into a more reasonable arrangement.  I was simply suffering too much.  Something had to give.

The truth of the Divine Source is found within awakening.  It will tell you its secrets if you will but listen. In order to listen you may need to consider that perhaps everything you built your life on was not correct....or in alignment with what the Source is. What makes Source so perfect is how simple it is.  Perfection is not complex at is finding one small truth that works in everything and then becoming that truth throughout. And what is this truth that Source has become or is?


Its just that simple. Really.

Of course this wont satisfy many.  There has to be something more to it.  But what you do not realize, if you find yourself unsatisfied with what I have just offered on a silver platter is that this love has the capacity to be everything, to encompass every things thing that is.  Because it can do that, and because it is perfect, it can likewise bring perfection to your life.  If you let it. But we make it complicated. Okay, so now you wonder how is it we make it complicated.  There are lots of ways, but there is one way that we have been doing it for a long time and its karma. Now I want you to consider for a moment that karma is not just about action.  The reason why someone bonks you on your head is due to their karma. Its not merely action, you see, for it comes from a feeling they have inside of themselves like fear.  Nearly all karma comes about through fear. And what does fear do? It scatters love. Love cannot exist within the presence of fear.  they are two very different vibrations, and like attracts like, you see.  So negative karma is always built on fear.  Always.  The reason for this is that karma is in truth a turning away from the divinity.  We do this through fear. If you were to know the truth that the divine is ready to love you perfectly and give you a life of wondrous fulfillment, you would be at a place where you would know how this all comes about.  But why doesn't the divine just crash into the mess of your life and set thing straight if it loves you so damned much, you ask?  Free will.  It reins supreme. You are free to make your life a mess. You are free to turn away from its perfect love. Because you are free, you are also responsible.  This is how Source knows you will learn. Its the only workable system when individuality has been given to creations such as you and I.  Yes, this can mean we spend lifetimes stuck in the wheel of karma and feeling like outcasts from God or Source of whomever you attache the moniker for the Creator.

When we turn from the divine, we do so out of fear that perhaps it will not work perfectly for us. When we do, a vibration rises within us that immediately begins to attract based on that thought. When we doubt that the divine Source will work perfectly for us, fear enters and as it does, we literally begin to create, using divine energy, our lives.  The people we meet may reflect this fear in some way or another.  They will also reinforce our fear that maybe this force cannot be trusted. So we fear more.  And this builds until it spreads like a weed in the Garden of our own inner Eden.  Then we spend lifetimes trimming these weeds, but never really uprooting them once and for all.  If you consider that karma is turning away from the divine within, then the way to set it right is to welcome the divine into us to help us to learn a better way.

But how do we do this, you ask?

One way is through awakening.  To be sure, this may be something that will take some work, but I find in my own experience that the one thing that sparked my awakening was when I was willing to forgive an old hurt, an old shame that I had that was between me and the universe. The effect was immediate and noticeable.  I had let go of a heavy weight.  I was letting go of a karma, a feeling like I had to do it all, like I could not simply trust in the universe unfolding as it should.  No, my ego and mind had to solve this problem, but it was a problem of such large proportions there was probably no way I was going to get it taken care of in this lifetime. Somehow, I managed to forgive myself.  When I did this, I let this old karma go.  As far as karmas go, it was pretty easy.  It was between me and the universe and no one else.  It was a good place to start.  When I did this, I felt the first effects of awakening.  Then, from that day onward, my world began a transformation over a six month period that resulted in a more full-on kundalini awakening.  Now, will this work for you?  Who knows, really.  We are all different.  But the fact that forgiveness of an old burden that was karmic was at the center of my own experience has some interesting implications about the nature of this experience.

When we let go of those things that serve to keep us from the divine, letting go of them makes more room for that divine to dwell.  The divine is ready to rise up into your awareness at any moment.  It never judges you, never says you or someone else is more deserving of this. We all are. And this is how it feels, for it is perfect.

When you turn away from karma, you turn inevitably towards the divine.  Awakening can teach you in simple terms how to turn towards it.

Kundalini is universal energy.  Kundalini is not a religion or a philosophy, but merely a word to explain a phenomenon that happens. It is not tied to any faith.  It happens through out all the cultures of the world.  It predates all religion.  It is our connection to getting back to our divine roots. Kundalini is the essence of union.  When it enters you body it does so as a unity.  In fact, the yin and yang was never separate except in our own minds.  When kundalini enters into your awareness, it enters you whole, perfect.  The two currents of the universe are themselves already fully surrendered to one another in joyful union. What you feel through this force is the bliss of their own union.  You have somewhere asked them in.  Most who seek fervently are the ones most often to find it. Within them they feel some burning question they have forgotten was all about and just feels like some wordless question of why are we here, what is our purpose.  They are our purpose.  To find the divine. If you can realize that the energy you feel is their union, they can begin to show you how to unify yourself. This is why when you struggle in awakening, it is because you are going in the wrong direction. Maybe its too much ego. Maybe its identifying with some old hurt or negative karma.  Kundalini is there showing you the way.  When you simply melt and soften, you will feel its force moving all through you. You don't even need to know what you are giving up, or what you are surrendering for.  Just do.  This alone will lead you to feeling them more.  Then, as the bliss pours through you you might ask "what is the purpose of the bliss?"  Well, that is mind and ego trying to find a purpose.  the purpose is to feel love.  Feeling love will lead you to fulfillment.  Nothing more need be made of it. You are turning away from the hurt and into the love and bliss.  As you do, you loosen the bonds to karma. Keep letting it pour through you and stop asking questions.  Embody it. BE it.  Don't turn to your karmas and say "Yes, but that part of me hurts so much, it needs to be healed!"  So how are you going to heal it?

The only way to heal is to forgive.  When you forgive you give yourself permission to let it go.  When you do that the associations within the self drop away.  Its simple really.  But we make it complicated. You are more than just the self you are here on this planet.  You have far more resources at your command. Something like your perception made you believe you were somehow limited. You are not. You have to begin to trust that you are more.  You don't need to know HOW to bring on this more.  You merely have to invite it and step out of the way and watch as miracles happen by making them possible through how your belief is arranged.  You create your reality.  Thus far its a perfect mirror of your limit and lack, hurt or pain.  Now you can create based on something else.

So when I now do the work and I feel this pain in my energy body making me uncomfortable, I know that this is a sign that I have to do some letting go.  There is something more to forgive.  Sometimes I get tremendous pain.  I sit and thank it for letting me know it is there.  I say that I am thankful now for this pain because it shows me so perfectly where the hurt is, where the lack of the divine energy is.  Now that the divine is running all through me, I can feel its presence say to me "Lets fill that hurt with all of this love.....we can do it....I just need your permission!"  And I give it permission and I can feel this energy flood into it. At first, its like fresh water meeting muddy water.  They at first mix and the water just gets more muddy. But now more clear water is flowing in that there is muddy water.  It will begin to clarify.  The center will go from feeling a sharp intense pain to one of sheer joy and bliss.  Its a kind of seduction really.  Its not like some goddess seducing me, no, its more like pure love filling my light body.  But I have to give myself over to it.  When I do, I feel different.  I feel utter relief.  I feel the love of the divine inside of me.  I feel it in the way I always needed to.  The lie of karma was that the divine was gone from the world and I was on my own.  But with it coming into my core, I know wherever I go, it is there with me.  Further, I am also bringing heaven to earth.  As I do, others are better able to. I don't even need to know these people so affected because this is not an individual thing.  We are actually healing the entire species.  The collective template of the human identity gets rewritten in subtle ways at its source and as each person achieves this place, the vibration within the whole changes.  I know you might not believe me, but why do you think so many are now waking up?  Why do you think awakening is such a ubiquitous phenomenon now?  We come bearing the kingdom.  Like a mustard seed it grows.

The living presence of the divine in you is love and it is the truth.  If you feel like this does not suit you, then you have more work to do. Until then, you will be busy with what you feel you need to do before you come to this all on your own. But I promise, the divine has been waiting just outside your door waiting for the day that this happens.  Actually, that isn't true.  Its inside of you.  Its waiting for the time when you simply wake up to this fact. Your perceptions are all that are keeping it out.  As your belief and karmas, which are all tied together are loosened, you will give yourself some room to feel this. When you do, you will begin to learn what their love is all about as your awareness opens. It will open slowly at first and you might feel aspects of it slipping through you.  Just be patient. Some of it might express as powerful sexual energy and this might alarm you, but if you stick with it you will find that as your awareness expands, so does your experience of it. Because its love is so broad, it includes everything, even sexual expression.  As it expands and as you drop those limiting karmas, the energy will itself change as you change.  You are leaning the window of your soul so you can see this perfect light.  In the beginning, though, you are looking through a glass darkly.  Just trust. You will be okay.  Surrender, let go, give yourself to it and it will be much easier.

So Source is love.  Now I will also add that it is a love so perfect that it will take your breath away.  It is beyond anything you have ever felt in this world of hurt.  It will deliver you, heal you, raise you up.  The answer seems too simple to you now, but imagine that instead of love I were to say Source is the ocean and this ocean is everywhere and in everything.  Now how would that suit you? Source is a sea of perfect love and it is in everything. 

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