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Thursday, May 26, 2011

Poll

I have found innumerable things in lesser-known texts which were not included in the Constantine Bible, which comprises the bulk of the Bible today which pique my interest, that speaks into the nature of Awakenings.  The language is old, but clearly I see some remnants....these are those documents which were originally burned and their proponents were branded heretics.  Nasty business, the Bible-making Niceans....

But as I follow some of these books which escaped burning in the desert of Nag Hammadi, I feel voices and words that are near-perfectly aligned with the language of awakening all the way down to how the masculine and feminine energies work together....the problem is that there are many voices in these books.  I cannot explain how I can feel it, but I can actually FEEL when there is a different voice.  It feels very much like a different person has entered the room.  I lose my place sometimes, wondering what tangent is happening. The voice has changed....silent hands have been handling this document....so many hands...hands which early early on felt they knew how to convey this truth, people who were themselves not awakened....yet desiring to know the truth and had a vocabulary that sounded right....

As I have begun to read what the scholars have had to say about these documents, my original first-read impressions have been confirmed by their study of the texts at hand, which is that its recognized that some books show real stylistic differences in how they were written, with the best appraisal being that these documents in question are themselves a kind of compilation of different writers over a period of time.  Bear in mind that Emperor Constantine didn't call the Council that would determine the makeup of the first Christian Bible until about 326 A.D. (as an accepted date by the Church itself), so documents were in-hand for a considerable amount of time before anything was even formalized.  What I am expressing, though, is not something based on a formalized sense of knowing, but something else altogether, and is one that many people do not have experience with, and thus, perhaps, confidence in. 

For myself, thus far, these senses have tended to bear out as they relate to my perceptions in the area of empathic reading of others.  Often, I have found, most recently, just reading the words of a given author will reveal immediately in my own field of feeling where their issues lie, where their issues spring from and what remains within them to align.  I always consider that I could be misreading something, and yet after some 27 years experience in reading the auric field (I began seeing and sensing auras when I was in college back in 1984) and what I know from those experiences is that we have the ability to pick up on a wide range of information that is present in a person's field of energy.  With the issue of Awakening with me, I understand and am more aware of how unresolved issues lodge in the field, and it seems that I feel these all the time as I come and go in the world.  Further, this sensing is not bound by space or time, although someone in the world who is currently engaged in the now seems to help me somewhat in the vividness of my perception.  I also consider that my own unresolved issues themselves can serve as a distortive influence in my perception, either blinding me or biasing me in various ways.

At present I go on what I feel until something inside of me aligns more completely, which makes one a clearer channel, and less biased in certain ways (and also more aware, I think).  The more distorted we are with things like belief and agenda in our own field, the less we are able to see with clear eyes.  To my way of thinking and feeling about the state of the Bible as it is now, it strikes me very much as a historical document that has been the result of a lot of strange thinking that does not adhere to the essence of Awakening.  It is my feeling or position, that anything short of awakening simply falls short.  Falling short is not itself bad, simply that there is a whole realm of knowing, sensing and being that is effectively cut off, and the process of refinement tends to not be in the same engaged sort of way.  This does not stop an adherent from meditating religiously each morning and night, or pursuing some inner path, certainly not!  I reference, though, how fast some people can cut through their dross in the midst of an awakening as opposed to, say, traditional modes of therapy.

My Mother not so long ago turned to me in wonderment when I explained how I had dealt with one very old issue from my early childhood, saying that in all her years in the mental health field she had not seen many cases of someone being able to "get at" the material that was buried so far back.  The answer was in large part how an Awakening can help catalyze such change.  I also had the help of someone who was herself an intuitive, who herself could "feel" through my issues and help guide me to the waters of my being that were the source of the problem.  What I learned through that experience was that in order to get at this material, we have to FEEL through it. Trying to wrap one's mind or memory around such a distant "memory" isn't all that effective, short of some kind of hypnotic regression. At any rate, Awakenings themselves can be a very powerful method for dealing with large chunks of unresolved material provided the person is willing to tackle it.  It is my sense that as we clear our fields of this material, and when I say "field" I mean to refer to how the energy body that comprises us contains a host of things.  Our being and awareness is not the brain, but rather the brain is the physical mechanism by which information is transferred from one "location" to another.  Some of this material does not come through the five senses, but can be spiritual.  The brain does its job of placing the memory of it, but as eastern practices suggest, feeling based memory is also lodged in the body....in the auric field of the person.  This is why acupuncture can be used to release old issues, and also the system created by Ida Rolf, known as "Rolfing" which is itself an attempt at working out those "knots" which express themselves in the body and which are themselves, she would say, I think, are mirrored in the corresponding energy field of the person.  I only know this because not so long ago I was emailing a local acupuncturist in my area about the possibility of my having some treatments with him.  I had explained that I was in the midst of a kundalini awakening, something he admitted to knowing nothing about, but I expressed my sense that acupuncture served to help open these lanes of energy so that blockages could be dissolved.  He wrote back the next day and expressed his surprise over having just seen an article written by Ida Rolf in which she discussed how she felt kundalini awakenings were themselves involved in doing the same thing she sought to do in her largely intuitive process of working out the junk that was mirrored in the body through her very intensive, and sometimes very painful body therapy. He found this to be a nice synchronistic event in our conversation, and it helped him to relate better to our conversation I think.  Anyway, the point here is that I think that as we remove those distortive elements from our field of energy, so too does it clarify our awareness.  Instead of a muddy lake, we are a clear lake, more able to see what is there to see. 

I know plenty of people who think they know what was meant in the gospels....and we all know how broadly they can be interpreted to fit some needs, desires, hopes, and agendas.  But what about a situation wherein the truth was massaged in order to help fit a concept of what a church should be....one which fit a notion about control, keeping the flock following and perhaps even dependent upon the institution for community, understanding, and their salvation?  I think to myself what separates me from those people who would only seek to foist yet another dogma or interpretation upon us all?  I think the difference is that no matter the time, religion, or culture, an awakening brings with it some common language, or some similarities in how they seek to describe what is utterly indescribable....yet leaves traces upon us.  In the Gnostic texts there is the mention of the bridal chamber as an image for understanding union with the higher self, with our god and goddess self.  What is more, there are images of the "father" and the holy ghost, which was widely known to have been the feminine side, both became one in order to bring forth the child, known as the Christ.  All of this is in sparkling evidence in the gnostic texts, and before I ever laid eyes upon such texts, I felt that in my awakening I was dealing with the progeny of the union of the feminine and masculine energies. In fact, I came up with this notion long before my awakening got under full sway, six months prior while I was in the grip of kundalini, but didn't realize just what it was.  It propelled me into nature for some reason, and in nature I was shown how things were connected from top to bottom.  I spent months trying to tease it all out, make some kind of imagistic sense of it all. But much later I would find a gnostic text, The Gospel of Thomas, that spoke nearly the same exact words as did Jesus.  Over and over, as I poured through the gnostic texts, I kept seeing bits and pieces rising to the surface like shining pearls.  These were often pearls amidst a sea of mud, sadly.  But I would find accounts in the mystics of Spain (very well positioned within traditional dogma of the church some 1,000 years after Christ), in the words of the Hindus, the Japanese Zen masters.  Over and over, I read the words of modern individuals and the effect is the same; recognition.  its not that we are trying to grasp just any unknowable thing....no; we are all trying to speak this thing and as we do, its like a given quality is invested in ALL of our lungs so that the sound itself is the same....its less what is said....because we have not been made of normal knowing.  Our knowing is aligned in such a way that we can simply feel into it if our barriers have been sufficiently melted by this fire that burns within.  It bears no mark of the ego or the mark of an overly active mind.  This rises from a certain place....and its place is IN it....yet cannot be seen but can be felt....sensed....like a wild cat can sense with keen ears what others miss, or how a hound can catch a scent that is days old and miles away....

So I ask you....what if I were to gather these things together and bring them into a collective only those things which rang true?  I say this not to forward yet another agenda, but in a sincere interest in presenting those pieces, those pearls, which I do feel have managed to survive the two thousand reign of fiddling and the desire to edit and change....and having awakened, would you be interested in identifying those writings from old that bear the marks of such an awakened sense of being?  Can we find their traces?  Can we, dare we, make them into a collective, a book?

I would thus like to know your opinion and thoughts on this...

1 comment:

lunasea said...

Oh please do.. you know my vote already.. but I must write it.. be bold and brave and get to it while it is musing thru you.. (my two cents, smiles)