Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Energetic Thresholds

Its all energy….even the physical is a type of energy.  Entrained atoms moving at light speed, spinning in place giving the appearance of solidity.  If you knew how your consciousness is holding all of this together, you would be amazed.  And we do all of this without thinking about it.  We are consciousness coming to the realization that we are conscious. 
Within all energy work, there are thresholds  These thresholds, which I am not sure I have ever read about before, surely exist.  I have observed this over the many years.  The thresholds exist because we have filters in place.  There is something out there that is without thresholds, only perceptions of limit or location or being…..”I am not infinite so I can’t experience myself in my infinite scope” and thus, that “threshold” is created which you will need to overcome later.  But when it does happen, it will FEEL like a threshold has been reached.  Surpassed.  Broken through.  Its conceptual.  But this is what we do.  Otherwise, life would just be an ocean and none of it would make sense to you most likely.  You would need a nervous system that would allow you to process EVERYTHING. You are what you are for a reason.  That is itself a conceptualization.  A threshold. 
As you begin to bring larger amounts of energy into your system, you will find interesting things happening.  Abilities will surface.  Dreams might change.  Your consciousness might be different.  You might have some focus you had not had before. Your energy might become unzipped and flow up through you, liberated from its cage.  Your system is lit up in stages based, sometimes, on what you thought was possible.  Forget that these are belief based because in most cases, the belief will not feel malliable to you, but will seem like gravity.  To wash it away will often mean getting into the root of some unconscious material.  The energy will bring awareness to you.  In a moment something will happen and you suddenly see someone sitting there who was not there a moment before.  You see this person clearly, and yet you know you are not seeing them with your eyes.  The surface of your awareness, your own energy has become very…..shiny……..aware…..and you begin plucking things from the environment from around you.  Third eye opens or is more active.  You see inwardly the nonphysical reality around you….the subtle field.  And you can suddenly do so with startling clarity.  You always could….you crossed a conceptual barrier as the energy brought you greater awareness.  What you thought was not possible moments before can and will take place. 
Forget methods or means or dogmas or authorities.  Learn direct from the energy.  To do this means being able to learn from yourself….the beliefs that bias your perception, your mind and feeling…..and this is not easy but is entirely possible to do.  It is the core of all inner work.  You begin to self illumine. The more you set aside what you think you know, the more you will know…..which is that all forms are often built on shadows in the world.  Name something, and I will show you how it is shadow of a larger reality.  As such, they point to something, some times they point well, some they don’t.  You can know if you ask to know.  Understanding will come in stages, thresholds as you need and as you are ready.  
As what you did previously to give shape to the experience is worn away and you are ready to feel into the Source, there will come a deepening enriching, a mellowing, a process that continues in a way that is more like a partnership with a great mystery that does most of the work….you participate……and while you feel the grandest love, the deepest bliss… continues to work on you….changing you bit by bit.  Its a high height to which we ascend and to which we can fall without the arms of the divine to support.  Without it, we turn ordinary.  
If a belief is strong, the energy will need to build to a much higher pitch to begin to overcome it.  Some would say that you cannot overcome a belief that you do not want to let go of. There is a part of you that knows the truth….so if the belief that you hold does not really do a great job of hauling the water, it will show when the energy moves higher.  It lights you up. You can choose to hang on harder, but this will require a lot of energy and strain… the force of maintaining the belief will be matched by the energy flowing through.  You have to become VERY deluded in order to keep believing that the Emperor actually has clothes on….. When it is strong enough, even you will see through its bright beam.  And you can shut it down if it gets too much.  That is what most people do.  I spent the weekend talking about this to my daughter, explaining the kind of forces at work in relationships, and why people do what they do.  Most of it is about fear.  
Realize, none of this is with form.  Everything you know is informed by the physical.  Even your own inner sensing which is entirely nonphysical, will be shaped by your own expectations and beliefs.  While it is a hook to hang your hat on, as you move deeper into this thing, form falls away as a different kind of form emerges.  It is a light without light.  It is a shape without shape. It can be a little slippery for you, especially when ego wants something to sink its teeth into.  EVentually, you will sink into this mellow wonder and out of this a life will form.  
I can give you a great example of how this all happens.  In tantra and kundalini, there is this tendency to want to call the kundalini Shakti.  This is how things have been seen for thousands of years.  If all these gurus and yogis saw it this way, its got to be right, right?  Second, in tantra, there is this mention of the inner woman; she is called “the wine.”  Now as  a man, I know what this is.  I know why it would be called this.  However, both of these conceptualizations result in putting into your mind how things will be.  
All of what I have just mentioned to you is from a male perspective.  If you don’t think this little point is of little consequence, look at what paternalism has done to our world.  I am not saying male is bad.  I am saying things have not been balanced. The amount of women in yoga and who have been in ashrams before this past century have been tiny compared to their male counterparts.  So, quite naturally, its all from a male perspective in the mean.  The books your read, the teachings you garner from teachers will have the stamp of the masculine, and most often people don’t even realize it.  You just need to know how to adjust it to your needs, or better; feel it directly.  How you are oriented sexually WILL determine HOW you experience the deity.  The wine is either woman OR man.  A man will experience it as woman.  The woman will experience it as the man.  And when it comes to other orientations, it will be thusly be different depending on your perspective.  The orientation is itself an image from physical to conform to a deeper spiritual reality.  Two cosmic poles….extremes of all that exists….and everything in between.  That is why the old teachings can build into your mind a preconception of what it is you will experience.  
Men sitting in ashrams will be visited by goddesses when kundalini awakens.  When kundalini awakened in me, it was the feminine that I felt.  It was the answer to some deeper awareness of how I tapped the universal energy.  For women, there will be a wonder about the deity as male.  These are vehicles for carrying your bliss.  So whether the form of woman or man does it, what does it does it. We put importance on some bearded guy in the clouds…..and yet… truth… is a joke.  It is a joke because that image is like a grain of sand on a beach that is bounded by a vast sea.  Each grain is a conception about the universe and how it works.  it is less that God-dess has a form but that ALL is reflected in it, moves through it…..and yet somehow it is more than all of that.  it may appear to you in certain forms because this place is a creation.  And YOU are sitting here causing atoms all spinning at the speed of light to coalesce into something that seems like zillions of particles that give your body form.  Its all being supported, created, every minute. Second.  Nano second. 
There is a bud in you.  A flower, that will open up and it will surprise you with how it can open.  What you feel in that bud is the bud of what you will feel later…..kundalini is with you every second.  The path of tantra will become yours in such an awakening because the bud of you is about bliss.  When you realize that the universe was built on supreme pleasure and all those prohibitive beliefs you had about yourself and others need now to go by the wayside. No; I am not suggesting that you will become some sex fiend.  You wont.  In fact, there is a far greater tendency to bring all of this energy upwards to sublimate it, which means to bring all of your frailties upwards where they are transformed.  the force of this is so strong that it is a misery to experience it only through the sexual channel.  it has to be spread out through your entire being.  It has to expand within.  And it will.  As the bud of you opens, your primal being will emerge.  It wont be some mad slut.  It will see how the behaviors of the past served to cripple us and make use use the word “slut” in the first place.  There is perhaps nothing more demeaning than a word like that.  And it misses the point, too. As a bud, it is wonder.  It is everything that we think about, this bud in us.  It defines who we are attracted to, who we marry, the children we have, the kind of life we have.  When the bud begins to open, it goes from wonder to miracle  Anything that served to hold the bud closed is pushed away, threshold by threshold.  Shell by shell, the outer layers fall away as the bud opens all through you.  And yes, sexual energy moves all through you, but this is creative energy, the baseline energy and its energy is felt differently in each energy center, a room capavle of sensing a different wavelength of the energy coming in.  At the base…..its very primal…..and it grows upward from there.  No one center is better than another.  Each center, opened by the energy will have material that will have to fall away….negative beliefs…..feelings….old hurts and traumas.  You will not be able to embrace tantra fully until you take care of your parent work… who have not resolved their relationship to their mothers, for example, will have problems with other women and ultimately with the goddess in the universe.  To feel this deeply, you must clear the way.  And the same goes for women.  If you have father issues, it will limit your access to the masculine side of the deity….of the source of all life. A lot of these things manifest as issues with authority.  Until you get it healed in the micro it will effect the macroscale. Each scale can help the other, though, in healing the other.  Thresholds.
As you let go of form and rely on feeling, your need to flow some sort of rule will go out the window.  You wlll begin orienting yourself based on feeling…..and this will actually begin to focus you in the material. Weird events will happen.  I was needing a desk for my daughter….I thought how I wanted to find one that was at the same level as her bed.  I began looking for this…but did not find anything that I liked. She came and I explained how I had been looking but hadn’t found anything just yet.  As we turned out of the driveway we spied a desk whose color matched the flooring in her room perfectly.  it had been set near the dumpster.  All natural wood.  A few scratches, but perfectly sandable….built back when they used solid wood.  Nice. Heavy….but nice. We later found it fit the space perfectly and was at the exact same height as her bed so she could have computer and t.v. near as she worked on her bed, or at a desk with a perfect little nook on the other side for reading books and drawing. She is beginning to see how these things have a way of coming along in perfect timing.  
People show up, books come.  Someone will mention a resource you are looking for just the day before but who did not know you are looking for it.  Every day it is like this.  The medicine man Rolling Thunder who did work with herbs was often seen gathering a plant he needed at a time when it would not otherwise be found.  People tell how they would go out with him in the snow to find a flowering plant that he needed the flower for in order to do his herbal work that could not be found in the middle of winter.  These are impossibilities, and yet, the world will align to your needs when you have cleared the way for this to happen. As you allow the thresholds of conception to shift so will your experience.  Within the heart of all of this is pure powerful energy.  
And al through this, you are aligning, changing, healing, fixing, forgetting, remembering.  Its a big work because we are undoing thousands of years of silly thinking.  Control. Goddess, the feminine, is coming back.  In each man, she fills him and softens him.  Makes him consider that instead of holding on to power that what is best is that he share it....not even like a king, for a king demands allegiance.  In this world, we are all born of royal lineage  Every single one of us.  This is a toppling of those sacred towers built to control and false concepts that no longer serve us.  Time to rewind it all and find ourselves back in the Garden.  And in that moment, I shall be a witness to that precise moment when we peeled ourselves away from the divine and we will each choose a different path, a new beginning.  This is the Alpha and this is the Omega.  It starts here and it also ends here.  We do this in the now, but we also do it as though we become time travelers.  All of these ancient thresholds will be utterly erased, taken from our collective soul so that all that exists is a deep blue and gold being that is not made up of parts of aspects but will be one continuous and healed being.  No more shame, no more separation. All of those thresholds will have been removed as we realize that this place is what we have collective made it.  And now, in this little place, we are taking back that ancient power inside of us.....the old demonized goddess, the witch and wizard.  All of the efforts to expunge from the record will be like a giant erasure as we wake up to how all knowledge can be reclaimed.  We are doing this now, and the flames will grow as it spreads through the world just as Jesus described them.  
Every ending has the beginning in it.  If you wish to know the end, look to the beginning.  Even as you were born, it felt like a death to all that you knew, so folded up neatly in your mother's womb.  And even globally we are getting ready to emerge from a still larger womb, a still larger threshold....
What will you choose to create?

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