Wednesday, January 30, 2013

The Forgotten Power

We all develop tendencies, beliefs in how we must be.  Sometimes, our beliefs do not serve us, do not serve the naturally supportive rhythms of who we are.  For myself, I have been at this a long time.  I do not consider myself any teacher, but myself,  looking inwardly for the answer.  Always imperfect, but seeking greater degrees of what may unfold perfectly.  For myself, I know that what we think of as anger is itself a misplaced sense, a distorted version of a still very powerful thing that lies within us. 

Anger is most often a very natural force that has been pressed through the channels of ego and emotions, born often out of repressed emotion.  Anything shoved down will come back up violent or bent or distorted.  Fearing anger is just as bad as repressing it.  Next time, consider that anger, behind the associations that you attach to it, has something purer and powerful driving it.  You might be able to discover this power if you strip anger of all attachment to the world of things and use it as a dirving force more like a gale that blows through the trees.  It brings rapid change, it does what must be done.  It does not seek to harm or hurt, but has within it a cleansing effect.  it is like a flood that rushes through the creekbeds and flushes it of mud and muck.  It is like a sweatbath where your body si purged of toxins.  No one would dare suggest that a good sweat bath is itself dangerous if done properly.  Nor would we suggest that a strong wind that knocks out dead wood is itself bad or good. It is simply what is

I know that when I allow myself to feel this force, I move closer to the core of something that is what I am.  No, I do not mean that I am like a strong gale or wind.  It is thatI have the capacity to move directly and with purpose.  A summer breeze is sweet and is nice when it happens.  It is a delight, but also is supportive while these powerful winds are about cleansing.  If we try to make the wind into something, we can wind up directing it like how one might seek to direct nature. Let nature be.  Let this wind be.  Let it blow, but let it blow within you without a focus outward.  Focus it inward.  let it turn you this way and that.  Anything healthy will remain.  Anything that needs clearing will go. You might find that if you do this, you can experience a forcefulness, a power within you that does not need to be shaprened for a purpose or focused on others, but experienced directly.  It is a subtle, small, but important difference.  I suspect that we tend to feel that when we feel this force, it seems so much like anger, except it is not.  We need not shrink from this.  It can be a great sacred power just as important as stillness and introspection is in its own place and time. 

Don't fear your own propensity toward intensity.  Its force will blow just as long as it is needed as long as ego and emotion is not seeking to harness it.  Let it blow and see what effects it has.  By not turning it towards the world for a change, you might just find something that has lain hidden and forgotten or ignored that can bring you change and cleansing within. Just as we cannot argue with cleansing diets or sweat baths or other means, this force may well acquaint you with a part of your nature that will feel more natural, more easy, and nothing to shrink from, an ally in the cause, whatever that might be.  It may be, too, that at first you will feel such an association with this force that you will think it is anger, in which case I would say then feel it like that without directing it at anyone.  Do this until you feel its force spent and then, when you are not in anyway frustrated or angry, allow it to rise in your for no other purpose then to try to see it in a new light. Allow your past associations drop and try to see if you can see and feel it in a new light.  This new light could well bring you to new understanding.  By doing this, I sense that the explosions of repressed emotion will become less likely to occur and a greater peace will prevail in you.  Just because we have associated certain things with this force does not mean that this is all there is to it.....So run and jump, feel the forcefulness of your body and how it feels the force within it.  Feel the force needed to lift weight, to do a job, to do push ups or run or bike up a steep hill.  Do you feel the force necessary? Certainly we do not feel anger when we exert in this very physical way.  But it IS intense.  It is focused.  IN the same way, let yourself feel this force in you and let its own fire burn so it does not explode.  We are many things, many colors, and all are part of a larger pallet of choices that are true to our nature. 

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