Wednesday, March 7, 2012

The Sacred Marriage

Kundalini brings a powerful transformative force to the psyche.  It does this in order to bring about a greater sense of unity to the self.  Part of this is the process of marrying the two sides, the yin and yang more deeply into the self, to help bring its energies together.  When the masculine and feminine merge, creative energy is released in vast amounts.  This happens in physical union as well as spiritual.  It happens at a distance, and it also happens inside the self.  Just as a person might merge with another in a soul connection, so too does the self merge into itself in what is an act of healing by bringing to bear the union of the masculine and feminine principles of the energy into the self.

In the gospel of Thomas, there is an often-missunderstood passage where it is said that the masculine becomes the feminine, the left becomes the right….and this refers to the unifying effect of awakening.  It digs deep inside of you and brings forward those sexual archetypes in order to help you to learn to integrate them.  As it happens inside the self, so too will it effect its power on those connected energetically.  Nowhere does it stop, it does not discriminate;  it flows upwards and downwards, it will seek to unify unify unify.  Individuals, couples, groups, the planet, the universe.  As a result the self will often undergo periods of phasing into their opposites in order to bring them closer to unity.  When the masculine and feminine come ever closer in the self, the self becomes suffused in a flush of creative energy.  Along with the bliss of this experience comes also the creative energy. So whether it is through sexual intercourse or through the intercourse of the self with itself, coming closer into unity was always meant to be pleasurable.  It is the syntax of the universe.

When you are creative, it is the result of a blending of your masculine and feminine traits.  The two ends of your being come together to form a powerful juncture of unity of self that results in large amounts of creative energy flowing.  The purpose of this is that it has no purpose, it has a nature.  Its nature is to be this, and out of its foundational presence worlds can form.

Some time ago I had a powerful experience with my masculine and feminine aspects.  I literally flipped energetic polarities from masculine to feminine.  What I found so remarkable about the experience was that while my energy DID feel different, the bliss felt the same.  Being in the masculine polarity did not mean that the bliss was any different.  I felt it the same in my body as I did when I shifted into the feminine.  As this happened, a memory from another time surfaced to help aid me in relating to this experience a little better, a way to give it form.  I was a woman who lived on what looked like the Mongolian Steppe.  It was vast prairie but this was not the Prairie of North America.  I lived in a kind of yurt-like home.  It was small, easily rolled up and carried by dog or reindeer when the need arose.  I could feel how the energy of the feminine moved in me, and it stirred the same feelings as if I were male, but I was very much a woman. I watched, engrossed, as “I” saw the man with whom I was married to arrive.  I was in love with this man.  He was rough….he was sometimes dirty and his features were angular and asian in look.  His body was tough and short and strong. I loved him.  I loved him for his ruggedness, for his power and certainty.  I was in some ways the opposite.  Soft and yielding, we were two forces in opposite, attracted powerfully. Everything I felt about him involved my lettting him move through me.  I took him into my hut, I took him into my presence, and I took him into my body and energetic essence.  He, on the other hand did not take me into himself in the way I did, but rather sought to merge into the force of the feminine that I was focused within, and within that relationship, took me into himself.  It was an amazing interaction and it showed me how the baseline bliss was no different for male of female, the only difference was in how one was oriented.  They were, I am convinced, simply opposite ends of the same spectrum of experience.  Each were like opposite ends of a longer rope that JUST LOOKED like they were separate.  They weren’t.  Nor was I queezy about this experience in the least.  I was surprised by the feelings moving through me at the time, though.  I was surprised that I could so completely embrace her perspective and experience as I did, and I was fascinated with what the feminine felt like, for what this did was it helped to underscore how the feminine is in the world and it gave me a much deeper appreciation for the vulnerability that can exist within a woman.  To be a woman, there was a surrender that has not been a regular fixture with male experience (although I believe that it should in order to tap ones greater being!).  It taught me a lot, and I suspect it also served the purpose of helping to integrate these two aspects of self/being into my present day self better. 

Following this experience I found that I moved HUGE amounts of energy through me.  This was one of the most powerful experiences up to that point, and looking back on it, I know now that the surge in bliss that I felt was the potential of my own inner being to experience and express in a broader way its native being which isn't mono-sexual, but was in fact a combination of both, with a lifetime spent learning how to be "male" while de-emphasizing the feminine aspects in overt ways.  It taught me that far from being made androgenous, it serves to relate both sides of the creative spectrum in a powerful and significant way.  Even as these aspects become balanced in us, masculine still remains masculine and feminine still remains feminine.  They are part of a larger continuum of experience, but one that I think most people feel funny about.  We have so many limits and hurdles to just feeling okay with such an experience like I had.  I was pleased at how incredibly dynamic these two poles were in themselves as well as when merged.  No wonder tantra is so important a practice. It is powerful, carrying with it a pulse of energy so strong that it has served to animate the race beyond mere caveman days but a rich and hopeful future self.

This is the marriage of the self ever deeper into itself.  When we can do this, when we open the hitherto closed doors of the self, its as though the floodgates open. The biggest hurdle is fear and conditioned learning.  The single most powerful way to honor your opposite is to look out through its eyes and heart. It isn't that it somehow twists your sexual being into something different, because it doesn't.  By giving me such a close up view, I was better able to appreciate how the feminine can feel, the issues that are most important to it, and how we can merge our different parts within for a greater sense of unity and healing.  Jesus said in the gospel of Thomas that we make the masculine the feminine, and the feminine masculine....the left the right.  This is what I think he was talking about, a place where the self becomes married to all its parts, and once this happens, a greater sense of unity and realistic perspective comes into view.

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